Venting I hate it when they say...

[onewayroad]

What is the thing that really gets to you when you hear it said about suicide?

For me, it is definitely "Think of how much you would hurt your father/mother/sister/friend/goldfish/etc.". What about how much living for a few more decades would hurt me?

Sure, on my better days I might not be in a much pain as someone who just lost a loved one, but 1) I am still in pain on those days and it is fucking permanent, and 2) on my worse days it can be unendurable. So don't talk to me about hurting people or I'll give you a demo of it

Sorry that one just really irritates me. What is it for you?

 

[lonelykiwi]

Probably "You have so much to live for" or "But you were doing so well".
I was just doing a better job of hiding my pain for them to notice it

 

[polyswarm]

'It's the easy way out.'
'You have to keep fighting.'

Most of the statements people throw out are really just ways to shame you away from suicide, it seems to me.
Especially the one about fighting, this implies that people who ctb lost the fight.
Because they were 'weaker' than the people who continued living? Such bullshit.
Life is more a game of chance than a fight in my opinion.

The fact that euthenasia is illegal in most of the world, and the few places where it is legal are so strict about it is just incredible to me.

 

[TengoK]

I absolutely *love* (sarcasm) "but think of your family and friends".

So say 'friends' who barely talk to me online on a social network, let alone actually bother to *see* me in nearly two years.

And people who seem to conveniently forget that my only close relative, my mother, died over two years ago, I've been estranged from my father for over 30 years, and it's going that way with my sister too.

It's like I want to scream at them: "Who's going to *miss* me, then?"

 

[Candour]

When people say it's selfish (suicide is selfish but expecting someone to live a life of unhappiness to keep others happy is not selfish??) and when they say it's cowardly. These people have no clue, and just use worn out cliches

 

[Rocky M]

My former friend told me "you are wanted here, trust me. You need to ignore that little voice in your head telling you otherwise". Like that's gonna change anything. Funny thing is, she doesn't want me as a friend anymore (although, it's my fault) but still, it's ironic

 

[weedoge]

My former friend told me "you are wanted here, trust me. You need to ignore that little voice in your head telling you otherwise". Like that's gonna change anything. Funny thing is, she doesn't want me as a friend anymore (although, it's my fault) but still, it's ironic

I hate this. It invalidates all our experiences and feelings into "that little voice", its bullshit

 

[Circles]

Oh gosh I could write a book full of them.
'You owe society'
'What you'll do will have a lasting affect on this family'
'It's selfish and cowardly af'
'Just snap out of it, just stop being depressed'
'Life is sooo b-e-a-utiful'
'If you wanted to die you would have done it already'
'You should pray that'll solve everything'
'Just talk to somebody anybody as long as you get help'
'Travel the world'
'Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem'
''It gets better I assure you, please PLEASE stay'
'You ungrateful piece of shit you know how many people have it worse than you?'
'You're a pussy'
'What about all the future experiences you will miss?'
'You just need to find a passion in life'
'You need to have a baby, a child will complete your life'
'Most Golden Gate Bridge survivors said they regretted their decision'
'There's always a better option'
'Suicide only ends the chance of you getting better'
'You may think you want to die but you really don't'
'Did you take your medicine? Just give it more time'
'Life is such a gift ain't it?'
'You'll meet someone who'll love you eventually'
'Call 1-800-273-8255'
'Try volunteering and helping even more depressed people and see how depressing most of life is lol'
'Suicide is irrational'
'Your life is not that bad'
'You will go to Hell' Good fuck god and fuck you.
'Just go to school or get a job'
'Attention whore'
'Life is hard deal with it'
'You have a duty to the world'
'You're young you'll get over it'


I could go on and on and on but I think you get the point.
Suicide will always be a choice and any lifer telling me otherwise can go fuck themselves. What good is struggling against a constant, unrelenting, and in a lot of ways, wholly incurable apathy if in the end you still feel nothing but loss? If there is no joy in life, there is no life. If there is no hope in life, there is no point. What's the point of trying when the harder you try the harder you fall? Life is a losing game for egotistical fools who will fight to the bitter end believing what their biology and society tells them to do. We are all slaves to this system and death is the only way out as far as I'm concerned. Disagree if you must, but unless you deal with problems from sunrise to sunset, you simply don't have a fucking clue, and your opinion is worthless.

 

[NumbItAll]

'You need to have a baby, a child will complete your life'

 

[Trashcan]

"There are people who are dying but want to live."

 

[Mrs.O'Leary'sCow]

Ok, this is lazy af 'cause it's just copy paste, but it's the best response/analysis I've discovered to the assertion that suicide is inherently a selfish act.

Source link: http://thesacredmoment.blogspot.com/2004/02/roots-of-horror-suicide-taboo.html

It is a measure of the deep misunderstandings and unthinking moral commandments so prevalent today that a number of people have said to me over the years something like the following: "Oh, don't even think about it. It's wrong. It's selfish. Think about the pain you would cause all of those who love you, including me. Don't you see how cruel it would be? Besides, it's so weak. How could you give in to such feelings?"

But that isn't what interests me about this, and as I said, that's the easy part -- although it points to the underlying issue, one of critical significance. Here's the hard part: note what is missing in those comments. What is missing is simply this: any acknowledgment of the inexpressible anguish and pain experienced by the person who seriously considers suicide. Do you have any idea how intense and unbearable such pain must be for a person to view suicide as a viable option for more than a moment? If you don't, I suggest you think about it for a long, long time. And then think about it some more.

 

[Limbo]

The most ironic thing is, that the damage caused by my death will give everyone a glimpse of the turmoil I was going through, yetI will probably still be seen as the bad guy. Even though they got a small taste of my horror. People are retarded.

 

[BaconCheeseburger]

"But you were doing so well"

Yes, I'm doing well.. But I feel like shit. Outside doesn't reflect inside.

 

[onewayroad]

Several people mentioned people telling you that it's 'selfish'.

I just think it's funny that if you have a pet dog or cat in terrible pain, but you loved it too much to put it down, those same people would tell you that you were being selfish to keep it alive just because you loved it being around.

To me, telling someone suicidal that they are being selfish is the absolute pinnacle of hypocrisy.

 

[GeorgeEastman]

People won't even say it.

They always say, "You're not thinking about doing anything are you?" Or "doing anything like that?" I want to say "Like what?", but what I really want is for them to leave so I just say no to get them to hurry up and get out.

 

[eczema]

"you're going to hell" and "that's so selfish" are the worst to me. first of all, i don't believe in hell, and even if i did, i don't believe God would throw any of His children into hell for being unhappy and wanting to come home. and i know i'm being selfish, but like people on here are saying, it's selfish to make someone live if they don't want to.

 

[VincentValentine]

That "it's crazy" to want to kill yourself.

Another one I really it is: "you need to be a "stronger" person". It's so insulting and condescending when someone says that to you. So if someone is suicidal, and if that really were a bad thing that you're trying to convince them not to do, then the answer is insulting them, calling them weak, and making that person feel even worse about themselves and their life? Sounds a little counter productive to me.

 

[Mljonzy]

Life is precious. Don't get me started on that because life is awful and pointless. Also when someone says that suicide is selfish, they make me sick they can't even imagine the pain it takes to actually end it. People are just massive wankers.

 

[RM5998]

"Think of how much you would hurt your father/mother/sister/friend/goldfish/etc.".

If someone actually said that I need to remain alive for a pet goldfish, I would probably listen. At least I'm going to be entertained. The fact that I don't have a goldfish doesn't matter.

 

[Pastdue]

Pretty much today when I tried to explain to my doctor that suicide can be a rational decision in certain circumstances.
I told her they had figured out as much in Belgium where people can legally request suicide to end unbearable suffering either mental or physical. The look on her face was like I was crazy to even suggest such a thing. If she had to live a day in my shoes I'm sure she would change her mind very quickly.

Edit: also priceless was the expression on her face when I said that if Canada passed assisted dying for the mentally ill I would apply there as I have Canadian citizenship.

 

[onewayroad]

Pretty much today when I tried to explain to my doctor that suicide can be a rational decision in certain circumstances.
I told her they had figured out as much in Belgium where people can legally request suicide to end unbearable suffering either mental or physical. The look on her face was like I was crazy to even suggest such a thing. If she had to live a day in my shoes I'm sure she would change her mind very quickly.

Edit: also priceless was the expression on her face when I said that if Canada passed assisted dying for the mentally ill I would apply there as I have Canadian citizenship.

I wouldn't have dared to say that for risk of being locked up. People are so indoctrinated by their culture when it comes to suicide.

 

[s_girl]

Pretty much today when I tried to explain to my doctor that suicide can be a rational decision in certain circumstances.
I told her they had figured out as much in Belgium where people can legally request suicide to end unbearable suffering either mental or physical. The look on her face was like I was crazy to even suggest such a thing. If she had to live a day in my shoes I'm sure she would change her mind very quickly.

Edit: also priceless was the expression on her face when I said that if Canada passed assisted dying for the mentally ill I would apply there as I have Canadian citizenship.

I totally agree. It's legal in Holland too like with Aurelia Brouwers. You couldn't say that to a doctor here though or they'd lock you up in the mental institution.

The world should really be more like the Dutch: https://www.google.com.au/amp/s/www.bbc.com/news/amp/stories-45117163

 

[wanttodie]

I hate it when they say..

'It's selfish and cowardly

 

[Revok]

"Things can always get better."

Well they could also always get worse.

 

[AveryConure]

"But it gets better, trust me."
Cue the LGBT people who committed suicide before Trump got into office laughing their asses off before going back to "bed".

 

[NoHope]

...when pro-lifers say "All problems can be solved, therefore suicide is wrong/stupid"

It's easy to say all problems can be solved when you are not the one who is dealing with these problems. Maybe you will solve the suicidal person's problems then? No? Then why would you claim that all problems can be solved if you don't know how much that person actually struggled and what they went through. And some people just don't have the strength or energy to go on and "keep fighting". And sometimes, there is just nothing to "fight" for.
Besides, why should we continue to torture ourselves anyway, I genuinely don't see why people think it's wrong to just give up on life if one doesn't want to suffer anymore.

 

[TAW122]

"Life is great and amazing!"
"Being alive is great!"
"All life is precious!"

These are the ones (or variations of those) that really, really piss me off from people who spew them. Even the secular institutions are poisoned by religious dogma.

Several people mentioned people telling you that it's 'selfish'.

I just think it's funny that if you have a pet dog or cat in terrible pain, but you loved it too much to put it down, those same people would tell you that you were being selfish to keep it alive just because you loved it being around.

To me, telling someone suicidal that they are being selfish is the absolute pinnacle of hypocrisy.

I absolutely agree with you, and sadly most people don't see their own hypocrisy (or they choose to be hypocritical just because they can).

 

[Aaron Josef]

"Don't make a permanent decision to a temporary problem"

How the hell do you know it is temporary,You don't!!

 

[Anon1337]

When people say it's selfish.

 

[Pastdue]

I wouldn't have dared to say that for risk of being locked up. People are so indoctrinated by their culture when it comes to suicide.

I know it's flaunting with that possibility but they only have the obligation to lock you up if they believe you have an immediate intention of committing suicide. She also asked me 'are you making plans to suicide?' to which I responded 'no' because I know what their 'cure' for that would be, more trauma for me.

I guess I've looked at what is happening elsewhere and I just want my society to be more progressive to recognise the fact that suicide is a rational act in some circumstances. They are slowly coming around to the fact that suicide is ok to stop suffering for the terminally ill but not yet for those stuck in chronic mental/physical hell with no hope of relief. Sadly I can only find one influential person in my country who believes the same.