Venting i hate how complicated this can be

[roping]

i really just find the amount of factors that go into something like this incredibly discouraging. it's just so much that can go wrong with every single method, failing can be debilitating, i worry so much so i dont get the opportunity to ctb again. with hanging, your convulsions can ruin the attempt, sn you could throw up, mess the dose up or incorrectly estimate the potency, people survive some high ass jumps too. it doesn't really feel like you're left with too many options.

i do believe with reason, research and the will to execute, your chances can be raised significantly but at the end of the day its just so much to be uncertain of and it doesn't really make my situation much better.

 

[makethepainstop]

I know they make suicide so damn difficult. Why can't it be easy, they say the earth is over populated, but they sure don't want us to leave.

 

[Venus13]

Me too, holy fuck. I don't know why I struggle with the practical parts of suicide. I picked a good date though to avoid birthdays/holidays and it's sentimental to me in that regard.

It took so much time to pick a date. Then trying to avoid being a vegetable is the next challenge. These methods are like rocket science to me. I must have some mental defect about it. I look at the images of where the brainstem is and it doesn't line up with the roof of the mouth in my mind. Can't get anything about partial right.

First year I could afford N and what do you know, gone. SN is the only kind offering with simpler steps.

 

[makethepainstop]

Gonna use sn myself, if it ever arrives in the mail.

 

[October112021]

So I've got plenty of SN if anyone wants to join me.

 

[noalarms]

I agree completely with this.

Every method has its flaw. SN and N are difficult to acquire, suspension hanging is painful, jumping requires you to overcome severe SI and may also be painful, firearms are inaccessible in most countries, Inert gas and CO poisoning are complex and requiree expensive equipment and is difficult to store, the night-night method and partial are unreliable... you get the point.

As a general rule, a method is either painful or inaccessible, with the exception of firearms if you live in the U.S.

Isn't it just tragic how people who suffer to the point of wanting to ctb are expected to end their lives in the most violent and undignified ways?

 

[FuneralCry]

I also hate how it can be so difficult to leave. We do live in a world that makes planning suicide so unnecessarily complicated and I'm just so tired of it all. I find it horrifying the thought of an attempt failing and it's what keeps me here even know all that I want is to permanently cease to exist.

The problem is this pro suffering society that is so focused on prolonging people's misery. I personally see no point to suffering just to die anyway and for many people life is simply not worth living so they should be able to exit in a peaceful and reliable way without having to worry about the method potentially failing.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Yeah, the most assured way is really kinda gruesome, that being placing a shotgun in your mouth and you know the rest. I know it shouldn't matter, but there's just something about it, at least for me, that just isn't appealing. I have the means for this method, just not the will or desire for it. It would make things easier, I will admit, if I could. All the other methods do require more investigation, planning, homework, even expense. I do think we have the tendency to overthink these other methods. Maybe SI contributes to this, too.

 

[Nekohime]

Same; suicide could be so much easier on everyone if they just allowed psychiatric euthanasia the world over. Think, instead of suddenly hearing a loved one killed themselves in a brutal way, all alone, you are instead next to them, holding their hand, while they patiently wait for an injection - both are sad, absolutely, but one far less traumatic on loved ones, I think. Every time there is a news article of someone killing themselves in a public way, like jumping from a building or jumping in front of a train, the comment section on the article is absolutely vile, with 0 care for the individual that felt they needed to kill themselves in such a brutal way, most likely because every other more reliable method is so hard to access where I live. If people think so negatively of suicidal people then why can't they just let us leave the Earth peacefully? Why do I not get the choice to peacefully end my life, a decision that I have been set on for years, but people can choose to dangerously drink themselves to bits just because it's a Friday and they feel like it. Yes, I know there is a big difference between being drunk and being dead - but whether I live or die, since I'm a legal adult, should my choice alone, not my family and not some doctor that doesn't even know me or the prison I live in. The world has access to so many methods for a peaceful death, but we're selfishly kept from it and forced to do something painful, distressful or not reliable that could end up not working and leaving us worser off. I'm sick of people not listening to us and what we say we need - the other day I saw Lifeline posted on Facebook 'Squat for Suicidal People' when did any of us ever give the impression that all we needed to get better was a SQUAT? Next time I go to the psychiatric ward, instead of medication I just want a row of people squatting in front of me so people can see how stupid this is. Rant over lol.