Volatile

Volatile

God
Jun 18, 2018
1,286
It's so fucked up when you find a solution to your many problems but then something like cost shuts the option down. Even with the sliding scale therapists sometimes use, the price is still too high.

I thought of trying to get a part time job to help with the cost, but then I remembered from my last attempt at working that my monthly ssi deposit was reduced by how much I made that month. Might as well stay home then...

I live off disability for mental illness. My life is like being under house arrest. It's so agonizing. I could try to socialize but then I'm pushed aside when I'm discovered to not be a part of society in a normal way.

My mental illnesses are a result of the extreme childhood abuse I suffered, but society doesn't give a shit. I think ctb is all that's left. Either that or continue living this house arrest-like life until I die someday.
 
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TheCrow

TheCrow

Invisible Spirit
Sep 26, 2018
802
Have you ever tried listening to any of the EMDR videos on youtube? I just tried for a few minutes bc I didn't know what EMDR was, & the videos/sound seem kind of interesting. I wonder if that'd work?
 
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Kdawg2018

Kdawg2018

Still here...
Nov 10, 2018
272
Yes, this therapy works, I know two wealthy men who did this therapy, I think it's like a workshop also. They both reported feeling better after it. I think the main thing is that whatever you believe about yourself is not true (whatever it is that is negative- I am unlovable, no one loves me-whatever that is for you), and you pick what it is instead that is positive. You also will talk about your pain or trauma, and then make a new story about it that is more positive. I learned from speaking to someone who had done it, that you can build a bridge from your past trauma and those memories, and detatch from those emotions connected to those events, or how you perceived those events. He mostly said that we get to choose what story we believe and also in a way that we can recreate stories in our life to be more positive and something that we can live with. I don't know if this helps, but I understand feeling frustrated. I don't know what the cost of it is, but I can't afford it either. A large problem for a lot of suicidal, depressed, or people with trauma, is that we cannot afford treatments that might help us. I think that youtube could help, like the person said above, but I haven't seen those videos, so I am not sure. Good luck!
 
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