"I felt relief when I found out I was terminally ill"

[CursedFortune]

I read this beautifully written post on Reddit last night and was so happy to see someone validate similar thoughts that I've had over the years. Has anyone else wished for this to happen to them and would you have taken similar steps to the OP? I sincerely think I would for all the reasons that they laid out in their post. I'm thankful they wrote this so that others can have a better idea of how terrible the pain of chronic depression is to live through every day, to the point that living with cancer is more bearable in comparison.

 

[SHThrowAway213]

It's a very good written post
I have always thought I would like something like that to happen to me, and if it did, I would not seek treatment

 

[ValideSultana]

Honestly, this is something else I hope for. I'm a cancer survivor, you may think me crazy, but I'd give anything to have it come back. Obviously it couldn't come back in the same place, as that had to be removed. Cancer runs in my family. My father died of cancer aged 56. My mother had breast cancer aged 44. I had cervical cancer aged 22, then it recurred aged 34. Other members of my family have had cervical cancer, stomach cancer, throat cancer, lung cancer and a lot of us have also had a variety of tumours, brain and spinal cord. This probably sounds really sadistic, but I want cancer again, with no treatment other than pain medicine.

 

[jgm63]

I know this is not a laughing matter, but I can't help laugh a bit.....

"I'm a cancer survivor, but I'd give anything to have it come back"


Doctor : I'm afraid I have some very grave news.....
Patient : THANK YOU SO MUCH !!!!

Of course, I do understand what you are saying.....

 

[CyanideSoup]

I feel bad but I often wish this on myself. Purely because then I wouldn't be blamed by my loved ones and they would understand.

 

[ValideSultana]

I know this is not a laughing matter, but I can't help laugh a bit.....

"I'm a cancer survivor, but I'd give anything to have it come back"


Doctor : I'm afraid I have some very grave news.....
Patient : THANK YOU SO MUCH !!!!

Of course, I do understand what you are saying.....

I know, it is laughable!

 

[NotMeant2B]

This is a beautiful poem to me, it almost brought me to tears. I'm so happy for them, I feel them. 1700+ words that felt like a bliss. I wish them peace.

 

[okaoki]

Ah..... a fellow patriot

 

[Circles]

I saw this post also last night while skimming through Reddit though I didn't read it fully, but after reading it I'm at a loss of words. It's scary similar how much I'm like him, I completely relate to what he's said. Especially when he understands what's it's like when you're near your limit and can't take the pointlessness anymore. I just wish I could get a terminal illness also instead of having to kill myself, but all well.

And of course Reddit never fails with the ignorant comments. One of the top comments is:

"please find and consume psychedelic drugs..psilocybin mushrooms..lsd..dmt...
experience true godlike holistic substances before you depart..and maybe find some peace within yourself. rest easy...as above so below." Like wtf, I hate when people over glorify psychedelics, doesn't help with everybody.

Anyway, Thank you for sharing this.

 

[BPD Barbie]

Earlier this year I was investigated for a brain tumor. Now I wouldn't wish cancer on anyone, I've lost enough people to it, but honestly my heart dropped when my scan results came back clear. Everyone else was so happy and relieved and I just felt disappointed. I'd planned it in my head, I was going to refuse treatment other than pain relief and other things to make it comfortable and just let it do its thing.

Very touching post to read.

 

[Jean4]

I'm a 9/11 First Responder. Government thought we would all be dead in 10 years. I was thrilled when I got sick the first time and was vented and hospitalized for a month.

Unfortunately, I am anomaly and I am alive.

 

[riverstyx]

I'm terminally ill also. It's not too bad. Noone lives forever. My only worry is the pain and discomfort that may be facing me in the immediate future. I don't believe in an afterlife, so when I go it's just over. Curtains down. Like Woody Allen said: I don't fear death. I just don't want to be there when it happens.

So far I'm doing well physically, and my last scan was very uplifting. I realize I'm probably not going to beat this thing though. I still might get extremely lucky, but I'm not going to hold my breath.

With regards to the unfortunate reddditor. It's her life and her choice to make. She's mentally competent and fully in her right to make this decision. It's not hard for me to understand why a person would make that choice.

Depression can in some circumstances be quite severe and treatment resistant.

It's just like living with chronic physical pain or a disability, only that the disease is in your own mind.

It's not my place to descide for other people when they've had enough.

Here's a documentary about a Belgian girl who got euthanasia because of her treatment resistant depression.

 

[justanotherday]

Earlier this year I was investigated for a brain tumor. Now I wouldn't wish cancer on anyone, I've lost enough people to it, but honestly my heart dropped when my scan results came back clear. Everyone else was so happy and relieved and I just felt disappointed. I'd planned it in my head, I was going to refuse treatment other than pain relief and other things to make it comfortable and just let it do its thing.

Very touching post to read.

 

[Asta]

Jean4 If Guiliani hadn't said that the area was safe and everyone had been protected with hazmat suits and masks, do you think so many would have died? I'm so sorry for all that you and the others have gone through!

Many years ago I thought I felt a lump, went to a doc for a test and while waiting a week for the results, was literally dancing for joy, I was so thrilled, like you, Jean! Then the disappointment. The nurse who gave me the news couldn't understand why I said, "Oh, rats!"

 

[MeltingHeart]

I feel guilty for thinking it - but I wish I was too!

 

[justanotherday]

This sounds like me too! I was so disappointed a few years ago when a spot on my long turned out to be nothing. I was praying it would be cancerous , and I would refuse treatment. See, I am just too damned afraid to try and ctb by my own hand again... afraid of another failed attempt. So, instead I just hope and (pray) for some cancer diagnoses, ect...
lung, not long... sorry typing mistake