I feel weirdly...at peace

[DanLip22]

I've just accepted that this is the most rational outcome for me. I had the will to live years ago but after everything that's happened to me I'm just ready to go. I've noticed that I don't even negotiate with myself in my head anymore ("Oh, well maybe if I can just fix x and y then I can live peacefully"). My SN will be here by either tomorrow or Wednesday and I'm gonna ctb on Friday...will be nice.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

I used to feel a lot of peace at the thought of suicide. Then I procrastinated and aborted attempts for months. Finding out I'm too weak for it has introduced me to a whole new hell.

 

[DanLip22]

I used to feel a lot of peace at the thought of suicide. Then I procrastinated and aborted attempts for months. Finding out I'm too weak for it has introduced me to a whole new hell.

You could possibly try SN?

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

You could possibly try SN?

Mine got intercepted by customs. I suppose I could try again but I don't want to wait. But guess what, I won't go through with my plan to hang myself in the meantime. So I might as well. I live with my dad so the delivery could fail even if it gets here.

I just live on in this hellish half life where I stink and starve and do nothing.

 

[DanLip22]

Mine got intercepted by customs. I suppose I could try again but I don't want to wait. But guess what, I won't go through with my plan to hang myself in the meantime. So I might as well. I live with my dad so the delivery could fail even if it gets here.

I just live on in this hellish half life where I stink and starve and do nothing.

I'm so sorry. I really hope you find peace. I live with my parents aswell but they're kind of...disinterested so I just told them it's material for an art project for uni and they believed me.