nozomu
Global Mod // will i wiN my recovery arc
- Nov 28, 2022
- 1,082
I am always grieving myself. I can't believe I have to die. I'm stuck going between intense sadness, anger, acceptance, it never stays linear but I am hurting so bad. This won't end until I die either.... Fucking unbearable ... I wish I could just go now because I can't deal with these feelings
I'm grieving the life and love I never got to hold onto. The things I needed from the world that it never was kind enough to give to me. I'm grieving the person who has so much to give but has no way to survive the world to give it. I'm burning away. I feel sick whenever I get like this because it hurts so bad. But I have to go. I can't bear this world anymore. I can't face this life with a honest smile.
I'm holding out through my last few obligations to others before I go. But I need to leave. I'm so distraught, angry, sad. Why do bad people get the world handed to them and more and I can never escape this crushing pain? Why do they get to live painless existences and I have to die?
I miss when I had hope. But it is but a delusion for someone like me. My only path forward is to the end.
I'm grieving the life and love I never got to hold onto. The things I needed from the world that it never was kind enough to give to me. I'm grieving the person who has so much to give but has no way to survive the world to give it. I'm burning away. I feel sick whenever I get like this because it hurts so bad. But I have to go. I can't bear this world anymore. I can't face this life with a honest smile.
I'm holding out through my last few obligations to others before I go. But I need to leave. I'm so distraught, angry, sad. Why do bad people get the world handed to them and more and I can never escape this crushing pain? Why do they get to live painless existences and I have to die?
I miss when I had hope. But it is but a delusion for someone like me. My only path forward is to the end.