Venting I feel it's soon for me

[Theresnoescape]

Hi all,

I feel I'm at the point I have to make a decision one way or the other now. I have everything I need for 2 different methods, SN or FSH.

I suppose I could keep buying things for other methods, but what's the point of that, I still need to just get on with it.

An ex colleague recently took his life by hanging, and as bad as it sounds, I was jealous.

The only thing still keeping me here is family, I really don't want to hurt anyone but at what point do I put myself first? I can't carry on feeling like this much longer.

I'm living back with my parents now after the breakdown of my 25 year relationship. Yes, I could get a place of my own, but would that even make me feel any better? Possibly even worse, I don't know.

I don't feel like this because of my relationship ending (though that certainly hasn't helped) I've always felt this way and now I'm just so so tired of it.

Anyway, I'm planning on going in the summertime when it's warmer outside, I don't want to do it in my parent's house, and wouldn't feel comfortable at all in a hotel. More thinking for me I suppose.

 

[Realog11]

I would go the sn route if I was you, but if you want to do fsh that's fine, I also tried to do fsh in my past

 

[FuneralCry]

I really understand feeling so tired of it all, I also feel so tired of suffering in this existence, I wish you the best.

 

[Theresnoescape]

I would go the sn route if I was you, but if you want to do fsh that's fine, I also tried to do fsh in my past

It will most likely be SN, hanging is my back up plan. What happened with your attempt if you don't mind me asking?

 

[Realog11]

It will most likely be SN, hanging is my back up plan. What happened with your attempt if you don't mind me asking?

My first attempt was an overdose than hanging I failed the overdose cause I woke up vomiting everything, when I failed hanging it was cause I didn't know how to do it right

 

[Theresnoescape]

My first attempt was an overdose than hanging I failed the overdose cause I woke up vomiting everything, when I failed hanging it was cause I didn't know how to do it right

Ah ok, that's one of my biggest fears, failing my attempt. That and the SN making it difficult to breathe, I think it would be panic inducing. CTB certainly isn't easy.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do with your future.

 

[Realog11]

Ah ok, that's one of my biggest fears, failing my attempt. That and the SN making it difficult to breathe, I think it would be panic inducing. CTB certainly isn't easy.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do with your future.

Hopefully we both will be unconscious from the sn to not notice our breathing

 

[Theresnoescape]

Hopefully we both will be unconscious from the sn to not notice our breathing

Yeah hopefully, I'll be following the protocol to the letter, nothing much else we can do really.

 

[Deepdense]

If it feels too early, it probably is.

 

[Realog11]

If it feels too early, it probably is.

Yep felt too early for me when I made my ctb thread lol, so I'm doing it on Friday

If it feels too early, it probably is.

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