turbomightbegone
🎣
- Nov 13, 2023
- 181
i failed at partial around 2 hours ago and my god do i feel awful. it was purely out of impulse if anything
all i remember is being semi-unconscious for a few minutes before snapping back awake. i think what happened was that I either didnt tighten the rope around my neck tight enough or i missed the carotid artery altogether. doesn't really matter atm as im not risking another attempt now
my neck and head hurts a bit but otherwise im fine. nobody ended up walking in on me trying to ctb or anything which is good. I reckon if i did manage to pass out completely I wouldn't be saved in time
I still feel rather shitty about it now, I hate how the one time I actually gathered up enough courage to ctb I fail. it feels like I can't do anything right.
i really need to get my thoughts to stay put for one minute and stop jumping to drastic measures. there's a high risk that I'll get caught if i keep impulsively trying to partial hang because of a moodswing or whatever
all i remember is being semi-unconscious for a few minutes before snapping back awake. i think what happened was that I either didnt tighten the rope around my neck tight enough or i missed the carotid artery altogether. doesn't really matter atm as im not risking another attempt now
my neck and head hurts a bit but otherwise im fine. nobody ended up walking in on me trying to ctb or anything which is good. I reckon if i did manage to pass out completely I wouldn't be saved in time
I still feel rather shitty about it now, I hate how the one time I actually gathered up enough courage to ctb I fail. it feels like I can't do anything right.
i really need to get my thoughts to stay put for one minute and stop jumping to drastic measures. there's a high risk that I'll get caught if i keep impulsively trying to partial hang because of a moodswing or whatever