helpmegetout
lost
- Oct 19, 2023
- 7
I have suicidal thoughts since I'm 10 and tried to ctb many times. They were all impulsive attempts. The truth is that I feel so bad lately but I don't want to die. My existence feels like pure suffering. I have suicidal thoughts all the time and I'm collecting my sleeping pills since over a month now, mixed with alcohol it could kill me. But actually I just want my suffering to end. I wanna feel better. I wanna live a life worth living and I don't know how the fuck I can get out of this. I don't wanna life in a hole anymore. I want friends and a hobby. I have a loving boyfriend. I'm thankful for that but of course he can't save me. And I can't save myself.