Venting I don’t want nothingness

[EmotionlessWanderer]

I want to exist. I want to be myself I just don't want to live in this world anymore. I hate it. How do I convince myself that death will reward me with an peaceful afterlife? I believe in one but it's not enough to make me at peace.

I don't want to lose myself but I have to because I'm never going to fit in this damn world. I just want to wake up in one I finally can sympathize with. I don't want my CTB to be the end of existence.

I want out of this body but I want to keep my thoughts and imagination. Why can't there be definite proof of an existence after death so I can finally be at peace?

Why am I such a coward?

 

[Philip]

I feel the same way sometimes....but at this point nothingness would be just fine

 

[Minudah]

We're just useless lab rats for an experiment. The experimenters wouldn't waste anything giving us. They wouldn't torture us for their experiment if they would. Keeping us in the simulation past our use would be wasting their resources for no reason

 

[meaningisgone]

Nothingness used to be my greatest fear. No past, present, or future. Nothing anyone ever did mattered at all, because it never happened. When I was a kid, I had awful night terrors about nothingness.

But I gotta say... over these past few years... nothingness sounds super nice. Well, it's not nice, really. Because it's nothing. But that sounds... nice.

It's nice that you still like your thoughts and imagination enough to want to retain them. That's sweet and endearing. Maybe you're not done with yourself. Which doesn't make you a coward. It makes you strong in a messed up world.

 

[itsallover]

My best advice is for you to say to hell with everything negative in your life. There are no rules to life and how you should live as everyone just cares about their own ass. Seriously just do whatever you want. Just enjoy yourself and throw caution to the wind. Even people full of crazy tattoos and piercings go out there and make a life for themselves no matter what people think. I read some of your posts and you sound intelligent. I would tell the doctor to stick that autistic diagnosis up their ass. They tried to pin that shit on me too. I wish I could wake up tomorrow feeling healthy and would walk out the door and never look back. There's gotta be some reason you're still holding on. I'm sure there's some hope mixed in with all that fear. You're young so it would really be a shame for you to go. Pm me if you wanna talk.

 

[nooo2]

I personally believe we just come back as different people, our souls? Our sub-conscious, our energy? I don't really believe in a heaven or a peacefulness we go to after we die. I mean just take a look at our world, the universe and all the weird things exist but they all stick so perfectly together. I'm rambling and probably sounding insane, but I'm okay with either possibility of death, if it's just blissful nothingness, I'm fine with that. If I come back as another human being, I'm fine with that as long as I'm cleansed of the current thoughts and issues I have in my current life.

 

[mpti]

I feel you. Sometimes I'd like to imagine that there's something after death where I can meet the love of my life, be comfortable in my own skin, and not be a fuckup in general. But imo nothingness after we die is the most likely scenario, and I guess that's better than being sad.

 

[GeorgeEastman]

Sadly, this is all you get.

It's either this or nothing. I'm so mind fucked that I'd take nothing. This mind can never be unfucked. I think that's a song or something. But nothingness is heaven to me. I want it, need it and will be glad when I'm really on the verge of it.

 

[Beyondajoke]

But nothingness is heaven to me. I want it, need it and will be glad when I'm really on the verge of it.

The best feeling I've had for years was going under general anaesthetic... a kind of tingling and then blackness and nothing. It was wonderful and a relief. I hope to replicate it permanently soon.

 

[Nitromask]

The nothingness is irrelevant as you won't be experiencing the nothingness. You won't even know you're dead.

 

[Coral7]

I want to exist. I want to be myself I just don't want to live in this world anymore. I hate it. How do I convince myself that death will reward me with an peaceful afterlife? I believe in one but it's not enough to make me at peace.

I don't want to lose myself but I have to because I'm never going to fit in this damn world. I just want to wake up in one I finally can sympathize with. I don't want my CTB to be the end of existence.

I want out of this body but I want to keep my thoughts and imagination. Why can't there be definite proof of an existence after death so I can finally be at peace?

Why am I such a coward?

My friend, if you research, deeply, not only looking for the usual "hard" evidence but also using your mind's eye and intuition, you'll have the "definite proof" you conscious mind need to feel more calm/secure now...

I can talk for myself, and after many "hard evidence" + intuition, I can assure you that what you want: be able to Live in another "world" or plane of existence, so to speak, without this current bio-body and the many limitations of this world; is precisely what you are able to get when you set free of this "existence" and its "laws."

You, in Essence, are a powerful Being-Soul that is much more than this current part of you now talking/writing, your whole-Self with all its natural "tools" or energetic capabilities to create the Life you truly want, in "anywhere" you want, will be more easily available when you recover your Natural Being, which don not need a physical body to exist and just BE (thinking, understanding, feeling, Be Pure Creative Consciousness).

Ps: you are Not a coward, you just simply are a human experiencing this specific human existence with all its limitated "rules" (one of them: an automatic amnesia in a conscious level of the Whole Magnificent Being you truly Are, the moment we "born" biologically in this world.)

 

[EmotionlessWanderer]

My friend, if you research, deeply, not only looking for the usual "hard" evidence but also using your mind's eye and intuition, you'll have the "definite proof" you conscious mind need to feel more calm/secure now...

I can talk for myself, and after many "hard evidence" + intuition, I can assure you that what you want: be able to Live in another "world" or plane of existence, so to speak, without this current bio-body and the many limitations of this world; is precisely what you are able to get when you set free of this "existence" and its "laws."

You, in Essence, are a powerful Being-Soul that is much more than this current part of you now talking/writing, your whole-Self with all its natural "tools" or energetic capabilities to create the Life you truly want, in "anywhere" you want, will be more easily available when you recover your Natural Being, which don not need a physical body to exist and just BE (thinking, understanding, feeling, Be Pure Creative Consciousness).

Ps: you are Not a coward, you just simply are a human experiencing this specific human existence with all its limitated "rules" (one of them: an automatic amnesia in a conscious level of the Whole Magnificent Being you truly Are, the moment we "born" biologically in this world.)

How do I find this proof?

 

[Coral7]

How do I find this proof?

Oh, like I said, the "proofs" are around you, even here, now, you need to understand that we currently are in a different "plane of existence" (with different physical "features" so to speak), at what we/you are without this current biological body. Here, now, the atoms of matter/energy vibrate slower than without this bio-body, and can vibrate even faster depending on the emotions (Love, gratefulness, sadness, joy, so on) one decide to create inside her/his Being.

In part, due to all of this, is that for our (so limited) physical senses many things and Beings (alive, starting by ourselves without this bio-body) are apparently invisible and seems non-existent; but that is far from the Truth...

Like I tried to describe before, one suggestion would be start by uknowledge the apparently invisible things (ghosts, any paranormal activity, psychic abilities, etc) taking each one with seriousness and researching deeply about it. Then, with the remaining that seem to be unexplained for "this world modus-operandi", review it again and always, at the same time of use your intellect, use your INTUITION... the part of your TrueSelf available now too, which has the ability to truly "know" without any intellectual analysis. Just knows, and why? because You (a part of You) already knew/experienced a given fact or information, now temporarlly "unkown" (not renembered) by your current "conscious" mind (which function with your current biological nervous system).

In short, @EmotionlessWanderer : The proof this part of you is looking for, is already there, outside (in other experiences) and inside of Yourself (your own experiences) before encarnate in this current existence and beyond...

When I started looking for my "own proofs", long ago, I discover a website described as Afterlife Evidence, which unified many of the apparent "invisible" or unexplained experiences, analizing them in a seriouss manner... making, for this world, visible the invisible, touchable the apparently untouchable and listened the unlistened... maybe its info can help You in find your so desired "aha moment" of memories... of Recognition... of "knowing without knowing how", You just have/feel certainty.....

Best wishes.

 

[anuglymale]

Can relate

I just want a simple normal life but instead we get this hyper competitive rat race of everyone against everyone

 

[ShadowOfTheDay]

If someone existing in the physical universe purports to offer you information about the non-physical "afterlife," then they are lying to you. Nobody knows, and nobody could possibly know what happens when we die. Not even theoretically.

 

[EvilForProfit]

Humans are cruel, though nature is very gifting in more ways than not. We are nature, death is natural. We should not fear ourselves. Nature is not to be underestimated, we are not to be underestimated. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst. We came from nothingness once before so perhaps we could do it again, especially with an eternity to do it. Peace

 

[EmotionlessWanderer]

I said it in a thread already but I'm going to try to give existence another shot. If it doesn't work out then I'll CTB.

 

[Pentobartbital]

Death! The undiscovered country...

Best wishes on your endeavours and may you find peace, satisfaction and meaningfulness in this world.

 

[Lisa]

My friend, if you research, deeply, not only looking for the usual "hard" evidence but also using your mind's eye and intuition, you'll have the "definite proof" you conscious mind need to feel more calm/secure now...

I can talk for myself, and after many "hard evidence" + intuition, I can assure you that what you want: be able to Live in another "world" or plane of existence, so to speak, without this current bio-body and the many limitations of this world; is precisely what you are able to get when you set free of this "existence" and its "laws."

You, in Essence, are a powerful Being-Soul that is much more than this current part of you now talking/writing, your whole-Self with all its natural "tools" or energetic capabilities to create the Life you truly want, in "anywhere" you want, will be more easily available when you recover your Natural Being, which don not need a physical body to exist and just BE (thinking, understanding, feeling, Be Pure Creative Consciousness).

Ps: you are Not a coward, you just simply are a human experiencing this specific human existence with all its limitated "rules" (one of them: an automatic amnesia in a conscious level of the Whole Magnificent Being you truly Are, the moment we "born" biologically in this world.)

I believe this how do you know this

 

[throwaway123]

I think whether or not a person is ready to CTB depends a lot on the individual. It's not something you can generalize. It's different for everyone.