Help I don't know what to do

[Phoebe11320]

I turn 28 next week. I've been suicidal with varying intensities every single day for over 15 years. I've never actually attempted because I'm afraid I'll screw up and be stuck with some sort of permanent physical damage. I've been in hospitals and day programs, and I was in residential treatment for a year for borderline personality disorder. Despite being the image of success - marathon runner, masters student, dog mom, lots of friends - the misery is so crippling. I can't do it anymore. What do you recommend? In terms of advice and/or in terms of methods.

 

[Pluto]

A bittersweet welcome!

We have many different backgrounds but are ultimately here for the same reason. You will find understanding and practical advice just by being here. The support can help with recovery or, at worst, sourcing solutions for methods like N.

 

[SamuelClemens400]

Im sorry to hear you are so distressed, and I hope it will ease soon. I cant really recommend much because I dont have enough info to go on. Like what is your goal here and what have you already tried to achieve it?

 

[blue]

This place isn't a fast food restaurant where you get your burger immediately; this is more akin to a slow cooker. A place to come for help. Whatever the help is you are seeking, you will need to put in the work and the time. If you aren't invested in putting in the energy to learn, then you aren't in a place to be discussing suicide. Impulsive suicide is never encouraged. If you are in despair, I recommend connecting with mental health resources to see if treatment options such as medication can help to improve your wellbeing and quality of life. If you PM me, I can provide some resources in your area. If you have tried this route already, I am happy to work with you to discuss some alternative avenues that you might want to try before coming to the conclusion that suicide is the option for you.

 

[Pure]

Have you tried ketamine treatment?

 

[FuneralCry]

Only you know what is the best option for yourself, it is your life and your decision. I understand it is hard to carry on when you are suffering, I also fear failing a method. We all deserve the option of a peaceful, reliable exit at a time of our own choosing. Whatever happens, I wish you the best.