Nothingheretofear
New Member
- Sep 28, 2018
- 4
Hello,
This is my first post after a long time of reading this site. I'll give a brief background to me, but feel free to skip to the end where I'll be discussing my ways out.
I'm 20 and live in the UK. I spent 20 months, between the ages of 16-18, sectioned and inpatient in secure and open wards. I've tried therapy and different cocktails of medications, yet the depression always return with full vengeance. On top of my MH, last year my grandfather died of cancer, and the next day my best friend took her life by train. Since then my life has gradually deteriorated. People around me say I have 'potential' and that I'm intelligent, but I think the worst thing about depression is knowing how much you could achieve, but not being able to achieve it. I'm just fucking up everything, and I've decided that enough is enough. I'm stuck in a rut, with no options left, and I'm sick of going to bed every night, kidding myself that tomorrow holds hope.
The method
I've tried OD'ing (however I throw up even at the thought of it now), ligatures, cutting arteries, and jumping, but I'm still fucking here, and want a quick way out. I want to die by train, however I need to plan the logistics. I know various stations where high-speed trains travel through, however none of which near to me have tunnels where I can hide round the corner. I could travel but it's simpler to do it at stations where I know there's no barriers, and know the platforms/times etc. I would prefer not to trespass, but the idea of just laying my neck down on a track seems so much more ideal than jumping at random as a train approaches.
A few questions though for British folk, as our railways are ridiculously secure, with fewer level crossings.
(And well done to those who have made it through this stupidly lengthy post too).
How quickly can rail staff detect trespassers around/on stations Vs. on long stretches through the countryside?
These high-speed trains top at 125mph, but would they slow down around stations, even if they don't stop there?
And anyone within the midlands/east midlands, with any guidance, please PM me. Thank you, so so much. I've done my time inpatient, and now I'm in crisis again. I tried reaching out, one last time, but now I'm ready. I feel so calm about it, and I just want to make the plan as smooth as possible. Please help me out- I've read all the threads and sites on train suicides, but I need UK-specific help
Thank you
This is my first post after a long time of reading this site. I'll give a brief background to me, but feel free to skip to the end where I'll be discussing my ways out.
I'm 20 and live in the UK. I spent 20 months, between the ages of 16-18, sectioned and inpatient in secure and open wards. I've tried therapy and different cocktails of medications, yet the depression always return with full vengeance. On top of my MH, last year my grandfather died of cancer, and the next day my best friend took her life by train. Since then my life has gradually deteriorated. People around me say I have 'potential' and that I'm intelligent, but I think the worst thing about depression is knowing how much you could achieve, but not being able to achieve it. I'm just fucking up everything, and I've decided that enough is enough. I'm stuck in a rut, with no options left, and I'm sick of going to bed every night, kidding myself that tomorrow holds hope.
The method
I've tried OD'ing (however I throw up even at the thought of it now), ligatures, cutting arteries, and jumping, but I'm still fucking here, and want a quick way out. I want to die by train, however I need to plan the logistics. I know various stations where high-speed trains travel through, however none of which near to me have tunnels where I can hide round the corner. I could travel but it's simpler to do it at stations where I know there's no barriers, and know the platforms/times etc. I would prefer not to trespass, but the idea of just laying my neck down on a track seems so much more ideal than jumping at random as a train approaches.
A few questions though for British folk, as our railways are ridiculously secure, with fewer level crossings.
(And well done to those who have made it through this stupidly lengthy post too).
How quickly can rail staff detect trespassers around/on stations Vs. on long stretches through the countryside?
These high-speed trains top at 125mph, but would they slow down around stations, even if they don't stop there?
And anyone within the midlands/east midlands, with any guidance, please PM me. Thank you, so so much. I've done my time inpatient, and now I'm in crisis again. I tried reaching out, one last time, but now I'm ready. I feel so calm about it, and I just want to make the plan as smooth as possible. Please help me out- I've read all the threads and sites on train suicides, but I need UK-specific help
Thank you