Venting I can't believe how stupid I am

[Judah]

A few weeks ago I met a girl on Facebook, we talked, we chatted and well at first everything was good, at first I helped her with little money since she told me that she had almost nothing to eat and I agreed to send her. It was only a few weeks ago that we decided to try to have a relationship obviously, for now virtual
I helped her pay her rent for this month, I sent her money for her food and even to do her nails thinking that everything would be fine and that as her boyfriend I should collaborate financially for being the man
We agreed that she would come to spend this weekend with me and last night she asked me for some more money to buy some things I told her I would send it to her in the morning but it turns out that my mother took money from what she had to pay a debt that we had a refrigerator that we both bought
So I was left without a lot of money for this month and I explained to her that for this month I could no longer help her with money. the last thing i told him was

"If our thing was so superficial, I prefer that this end here, I just wanted someone who was with me through thick and thin and I see that you are not like that"

in short i'm an idiot
Nobody is going to love me for who I am but for how much I have in my pocket
several times that has happened to me

 

[makethepainstop]

Men have been scammed in love many times across the century. Not stupid, a regular dude.

 

[Julgran]

A few weeks ago I met a girl on Facebook, we talked, we chatted and well at first everything was good, at first I helped her with little money since she told me that she had almost nothing to eat and I agreed to send her. It was only a few weeks ago that we decided to try to have a relationship obviously, for now virtual
I helped her pay her rent for this month, I sent her money for her food and even to do her nails thinking that everything would be fine and that as her boyfriend I should collaborate financially for being the man
We agreed that she would come to spend this weekend with me and last night she asked me for some more money to buy some things I told her I would send it to her in the morning but it turns out that my mother took money from what she had to pay a debt that we had a refrigerator that we both bought
So I was left without a lot of money for this month and I explained to her that for this month I could no longer help her with money. the last thing i told him was



in short i'm an idiot
Nobody is going to love me for who I am but for how much I have in my pocket
several times that has happened to me

Don't blame yourself for falling prey for desperation, but yes, you were probably used by this person.

No one should buy things for anyone in such a weak relationship.

 

[hungry_ghost]

Inb4 this thread inevitably devolves into some "all women are _____" type bullshit:

I'm sorry that this person took advantage of you.

Trying to find a romantic partner online is risky in and of itself, because you never quite know what kind of person is on the other side of the screen.

 

[Worndown]

There are people out there with no restraints on what they say for other peoples money. They called them Con Men but it is no longer gender specific.
As tough as you may have it right now, just be glad you are not them.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

I'm sorry this happened. It really sucks.

Inb4 this thread inevitably devolves into some "all women are _____" type bullshit:

I hope not. This shit happens to both genders. I don't know the exact demographics, but it wouldn't surprise me if it happened the most with older men and younger women in both directions. For the men it generally happens outside of a normal relationship and for women it generally happens inside one.

Cannot trust people to be honest these days. Keep money in your pocket until you know who you're dealing with.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

My ex-fiance' from a long time ago took all kind of advantage of me, financially, as well as, emotionally. As others have said, this is nothing new. My being taken advantage of lasted years. I think you got off cheap. Consider yourself lucky and try and move on as quickly as you can. And know that all are not like this. The trick is to find the ones that aren't.

 

[lionetta12]

A few weeks ago I met a girl on Facebook, we talked, we chatted and well at first everything was good, at first I helped her with little money since she told me that she had almost nothing to eat and I agreed to send her. It was only a few weeks ago that we decided to try to have a relationship obviously, for now virtual
I helped her pay her rent for this month, I sent her money for her food and even to do her nails thinking that everything would be fine and that as her boyfriend I should collaborate financially for being the man
We agreed that she would come to spend this weekend with me and last night she asked me for some more money to buy some things I told her I would send it to her in the morning but it turns out that my mother took money from what she had to pay a debt that we had a refrigerator that we both bought
So I was left without a lot of money for this month and I explained to her that for this month I could no longer help her with money. the last thing i told him was



in short i'm an idiot
Nobody is going to love me for who I am but for how much I have in my pocket
several times that has happened to me

Story of my life.

 

[Hollowillow]

A few weeks ago I met a girl on Facebook, we talked, we chatted and well at first everything was good, at first I helped her with little money since she told me that she had almost nothing to eat and I agreed to send her. It was only a few weeks ago that we decided to try to have a relationship obviously, for now virtual
I helped her pay her rent for this month, I sent her money for her food and even to do her nails thinking that everything would be fine and that as her boyfriend I should collaborate financially for being the man
We agreed that she would come to spend this weekend with me and last night she asked me for some more money to buy some things I told her I would send it to her in the morning but it turns out that my mother took money from what she had to pay a debt that we had a refrigerator that we both bought
So I was left without a lot of money for this month and I explained to her that for this month I could no longer help her with money. the last thing i told him was



in short i'm an idiot
Nobody is going to love me for who I am but for how much I have in my pocket
several times that has happened to me

Have a rule to never lend money. Never offer money. The relationship won't be based on that & scammers will flee.

I do my nails for free with a 10 years old clipper.

If she needs money for nail salons, she's a snob scammer whore.

Fake nails disgust me. Long nails too. My mother liked to grab my arms and claw my skin until I bled.

If she has no food, she doesn't need to waste a cent on superficial garbage at any time in her entire life.

Superficial whore. Using our hearts as weapons against us.

Read about narcissists and their manipulation techniques. Gaslight is the worst. Guilt trips are basic.

I had to forge a split personality to deal with monsters. SI personified. They do not stay long.

Express your needs & never EVER offer money

 

[Wormfood]

I don't think you're stupid. I've been in this position before and I've learned. As far as I am concerned it's always a choice to offer you money. If I don't have a choice that's manipulation. If I'm less lovable because I can't fork out cash then hit the road.

Look for women who are vulnerable with you. Women who want to get to know you. Women who want to give you stuff. It could be affection,money , a listening ear or something. When you like someone you try to make their life better. A woman who makes herself out to be desperate and makes you feel like you don't have a choice but to help her is manipulative. You always have a choice. People who adore you respect that.

 

[hungry_ghost]

I'm sorry this happened. It really sucks.

I hope not. This shit happens to both genders. I don't know the exact demographics, but it wouldn't surprise me if it happened the most with older men and younger women in both directions. For the men it generally happens outside of a normal relationship and for women it generally happens inside one.

Cannot trust people to be honest these days. Keep money in your pocket until you know who you're dealing with.

There was actually a special on Dr. Phil, I think? A series of older women who were conned by men online into giving them thousands of dollars.

When it came down to it, the women were just lonely, desperate, and vulnerable, and they basically succumbed to the same deception as OP: the guy needed money for rent, or debt, or surgery, or needed money to travel to her, etc.

 

[CTB Dream]

Sorry have this huma all type decieve lie tell lie many only money greed , even thoug deseprate monet need not lie other see injury not lie not tell give, this world terrible this same many abuse, not have money feel bored leave, human really terrible many lie that why prefer lone

 

[Judah]

Inb4 this thread inevitably devolves into some "all women are _____" type bullshit:

Sorry I'm just an autistic retard with money

 

[freedompass]

I've been financially exploited sooo many times, it was totally a pattern exacerbated as always by psychotic/manic episodes. This is why I'm just so relieved to be strictly celibate and keep all my money for meee

 

[Le_Dauphin]

I've made a rather similar rant here recently, the only difference is that I'm a gay man: https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/reversed-sexual-abuse.90927/

I apologize for my poor english (I'm brazilian) and I'm sorry you went through that!