I cannot bear my painful life anymore

[ilovebunnies]

Hi everyone,

I have been lurking this website for awhile and finally made an account.

I am struggling a lot. I have been chronically ill since I was 18 years old. This past summer, I got diagnosed with a new chronic illness that has no cure or even medications to manage it. It severely impacts my quality of life, and I am getting worse as the months go on.

I cannot keep up with my medical expenses. It has drained my savings and I still owe more money. I have a job but it's still not enough to afford all of these expenses. Not to mention I'm struggling to keep up with it because I am sick every day... I also really need to get more tests done, but I obviously can't afford it...

Recently I was informed that I'm being kicked out of my abusive parents' house. I don't have anywhere to go--I don't have any friends or family. I don't have any memories outside of being sick.

Things are only going to get worse as time goes on. I'm in so much pain it's unbelievable. Every day is torture. I really need a way out. I've read up on the methods here, but I have no idea how to access them--specifically SN. I am in the US.

 

[peacetime]

If you use the forum enough at some point someone will be willing to tell you what IC is, for SN. Besides that, some people walk into the woods with a rope and don't return; those methods are on the forum as well. I don't recommend you do any of this, just saying; there's nothing holding anyone to this life in the end.

 

[ilovebunnies]

If you use the forum enough at some point someone will be willing to tell you what IC is, for SN. Besides that, some people walk into the woods with a rope and don't return; those methods are on the forum as well. I don't recommend you do any of this, just saying; there's nothing holding anyone to this life in the end.

Thanks for your reply. I'll keep searching the forums.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm so sorry. You've really been given a terrible lot in life by the sounds of it. Yes- as @peacetime said- if you make more posts (game section is good for raising post numbers), you will get access to the search function- which will make it easier to research methods.

I'm sorry- your situation really sounds so difficult.

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds like a really horrific situation to be in, it's just so awful how this life can torture people causing so much suffering to be experienced. Suicide really shouldn't be so difficult in a world as hellish as this. I hope that you find the freedom that you wish for.

 

[ilovebunnies]

I'm so sorry. You've really been given a terrible lot in life by the sounds of it. Yes- as @peacetime said- if you make more posts (game section is good for raising post numbers), you will get access to the search function- which will make it easier to research methods.

I'm sorry- your situation really sounds so difficult.

Hi @Forever Sleep

I didn't know that about the games forum--thats a really helpful tip. Thanks so much

That sounds like a really horrific situation to be in, it's just so awful how this life can torture people causing so much suffering to be experienced. Suicide really shouldn't be so difficult in a world as hellish as this. I hope that you find the freedom that you wish for.

Thank you so much for your kind words.

 

[Hislight88]

It breaks my heart to hear you go through pain constantly. I know it's torture because I deal with the same thing on a daily basis for so long now. It has driven me to a place of hopelessness. Like you I want to the torture to end.

 

[DukeDestroyer]

Pain will be a chronic problem for me someday. I'm going to stay away from pain killers, hopefully I'll be dead before that happens.