Venting I can´t do this anymore

[takeyourshotfunboy]

I know what I´m going to do will hurt my friends (I have a few ¨real friends¨ but they live far away and I barely ever get to see them) and family. But the thoughts just get worse every day. I feel like an alien observing humans from a distance. I can´t relate to them and they can´t relate to me. Some of them let me hand out with them but they don´t treat me the way they treat their other friends, their real friends. No one ever notices when I start to isolate myself and stop talking to my so-called friends. No one notices the pain behind my smile. I know they won´t give a shit when I´m gone forever.

I don´t have an exact day that I know I will do it. But I do know I will hang on until after this Halloween because I want to spend one last Halloween with my ¨real friends¨ before I die.

 

[Sweet emotion]

Hey how are you doing. It's Halloween!