Wow proud of you! I'm struggling to decide whether I dare or not to throw away my SN because I don't think I'll ever get my hands on it again since I live in Norway. Could you explain to me how you were able to make that decision? My therapist is trying to make me throw it away because he said it seemed a little weird and fake that we were working on me getting better while I literally at the same time have poison in my closet and I'm afraid he'll stop treating me because of it. I'm so confused about the matter and it seems like I have a million thoughts about it that I just cannot sort.
Are you making progress in therapy?
When I talked with suicide crisis workers, they completely understood that I didn't want to tell them my planned method so that supplies couldn't be taken away. One of them even said they understood that having the option to stop the pain could be a source of comfort for me, even if I didn't want to take that option.
It's strange to me that your therapist wouldn't understand this if they've been trained in mental health. If you like them, continue with them. But if you aren't getting much out of it, instead of worrying they will stop treatment, perhaps you might look for a new therapist?