Help I am scared.

[lifeafterdeath]

I am scared as I failed my latest attempt. I wasn't close to blacking out, but I could feel the blood pressurize against my vessels as it tried to escape. I felt like my whole face was getting heavier and my nerves would rupture. I felt like the synapses in my brain would tear. And I am mostly scared because now I am unable to do it again. I tried partial hanging but my method wasn't correct I guess and when I pulled off the noose around my neck I was in a state of trance, my motor functions aren't still normal and I am having a hard time to breathe. I feel weak. The last thing I want is brain damage. I just hope I have the courage to see it through and die peacefully. And if things couldn't get worse, my sister put all these afterlife crap in my head and how I will suffer in inferno. I am devastated.
How do I make sure I will die? How do I gather the courage once again? It took me so long to gather the courage to die. Oh god I am screwed.

 

[Fallen bad23]

I'm so sorry you feel trapped like that. I think you should try to take a step back from the bus stop for a while just to feel comfortable about whatever decision that you choose to make. Ctbing is final and whenever it is done you can never undo it.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

I am scared as I failed my latest attempt.

Really sorry your plans fell through. That sounds bad, but I think you know what I mean. I'm terrified of failing and then being worse off, so I can empathize with your anxiety. I've read lots and lots and lots of books and reports/postings about different methods, but actually doing it is another thing. I don't have a solution. I just wanted to reach out. And to thank you for sharing more about possible complications with hanging.

 

[SMarie1204]

Whenever I feel trapped or like I have no other choice, I tell myself this is absolutely not the time to do it. My emotions can get in the way of my plans, and that's how I might fail (I'm only speaking for myself, maybe you/others can relate). You have so much on your mind . Take your time to unravel the knots you're feeling. You deserve it.

 

[Mogley26]

I am scared as I failed my latest attempt. I wasn't close to blacking out, but I could feel the blood pressurize against my vessels as it tried to escape. I felt like my whole face was getting heavier and my nerves would rupture. I felt like the synapses in my brain would tear. And I am mostly scared because now I am unable to do it again. I tried partial hanging but my method wasn't correct I guess and when I pulled off the noose around my neck I was in a state of trance, my motor functions aren't still normal and I am having a hard time to breathe. I feel weak. The last thing I want is brain damage. I just hope I have the courage to see it through and die peacefully. And if things couldn't get worse, my sister put all these afterlife crap in my head and how I will suffer in inferno. I am devastated.
How do I make sure I will die? How do I gather the courage once again? It took me so long to gather the courage to die. Oh god I am screwed.

It scared me too. I passed out with a bathrobe belt around my neck. It broke because of my weight. I woke up on the ground thinking, that's it. I have to do it by accident because since then my SI kicks in. I have a solid setup but scared as ever and my body won't let me do it. This is where I got information from to set up, in addition with keeping rope above Adams apple. No amount of information helps us when it's time to do it tjough. SI kicks in. I wonder why so many are able to do it though. https://archive.ashspace.org/ash.xanthia.com/suspension.html