Discussion How would you go about cutting someone off?

[Rocinante]

I think being direct might be the best route for someone I find too bothersome/toxic. Wouldn't want to ghost someone and leave them without closure. No need to beat around the bush with people you don't want to deal with. But also don't want to justify with valid reasons why they were cut off.

What do you think would be the best course?

 

[enduringwinter]

I just ghost. Usually when it comes to that for me the other party is bothersome because they actually have become tired of me but would still drag it on. It hurts me more so I have to be the one to cut the loss. They won't be seeking me and we would both ignore if we run into each other again.

 

[psp3000]

I would be direct in these situations even if the person finds whatever reason you're cutting them off for rude

and then once the discussion is over it is best to block them whether if it ended on good or bad terms (mostly in case you feel some kind of guilt or won't stop checking if they have reached out again) but that's optional because that can also be seen as rude and it depends on the thing/reason why you're cutting them off

edit: if it bothers you or depresses you after too much I think it's a good time to focus on hobbies after you leave that guilt/depression phase especially if there isn't anyone else besides that person

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I actually cut someone off last year. It was easy since I had a mutual friend to do it all for me.

 

[HereTomorrow]

Depends if it's IRL or online.

If it's online, I typically just stop replying. If I have a particular reason to cut someone off (like harassment), I firmly say it and block them everywhere.

If it's IRL, it also depends if you go out of your way to see them or you see them inevitably (like co-workers). Being direct helps for some people but will trigger an outrage in others.

It'll hurt either way, but it all depends on the person, situation, and current relationship. There's no universal answer to cutting someone off peacefully with minimal emotional damage to both ends, if you still care for the person.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Pretty much everyone who has cut me off stopped either reaching out or responding and thereby expected me to "get the hint". Since you have higher standards than that you could at least tell them why.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I'd personally use a chainsaw as it making cutting people easy.

Alright, real answer, I think I'd just be direct and give them closure like you said in your post. If I were the one getting cut off by somebody, I think I would want closure first so that I at least know why they're cutting me off so it's only fair I were to give others closure too if I were to cut them off

 

[Dark Moon]

I'd just be direct, give them closure, I don't like to keep people hanging. I might have to do this myself soon.

 

[Rocinante]

I just ghost. Usually when it comes to that for me the other party is bothersome because they actually have become tired of me but would still drag it on. It hurts me more so I have to be the one to cut the loss. They won't be seeking me and we would both ignore if we run into each other again.

This is the best decision imo

 

[derpyderpins]

This is the best decision imo

Depends greatly on the situation, I think. You said bothersome/toxic. I think those are different. If they've done nothing harmful and it's just not working I think they're owed at least a message telling them what is happening. If they're "toxic" as in they treat you badly and you've tried talking to them about it then yeah at some point you have to protect yourself.

Also have to be certain you are cutting ties completely. The most horribly awful thing you could do is partially ghost but occasionally come back so they still think there's something there.