Hhhh

Hhhh

Exhausted
Apr 6, 2019
29
I can't bring myself to care about anyone. At my grandmother's funeral, I saw my mom weep for the loss of her own mother, but I felt nothing. The entire open casket funeral I couldn't bring myself to tears, and quite honestly couldn't feel anything at all. All I could think of was how gross it is to be in one room with a dead body, as the entire family cried. Now again, my mother lost a friend dear to her and cried in front of me. I felt nothing. I didn't know what to do or say, I changed the subject. Even now, I can't bring myself to feel bad about it. A friend of mine could die and I feel like I wouldn't react at all. I can't love my mother, I can't love my family nor friends. I feel like I'm so deep in my own pain, I can't bring myself to care about somebody else.
It's just me and that's all there is.
 
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Memento Mori

Memento Mori

shambling garbage
Jan 24, 2019
573
i was annoyed from all the people other around so i may looked like i was pissed from being there and waiting. that sucked
should visit his grave some day. i dont have real connection to any family member, maybe dad somehow. friend died too in 2016, somethimes i think about him. either get over it and live with it or...wenn idk

damn dude thi is is so hard to type i'm normalle very pro at keyboard btut these benzos are a new level. drunk you may swing around by walking but on benzos you just fall down XD and u remember where word u were and where the right key lies. i'malso actually mixing languages together so ill stop here, if you have question you can PMme when im sober again,

peace!
 
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Escaper Boy

Escaper Boy

累坏了...
Apr 11, 2019
245
During my dad's funeral, pretty much everyone was crying... except myself. To be honest, I didn't really care about him. We didn't have great relationship. Considering the funeral took 6 f***ing days to complete, I was more like angry instead of sad.

"Why the heck am I forced to participate in these stupid rituals? What a waste of time! Why the heck I was not allowed to take a bath for stupid/idiotic/unscientific reasoning? Why the heck am I forced to burn stupid paper money that actually cost money in order to appease dead people? Since when dead people need money in the afterlife. Is everyone here stupid or what!?"

Sorry for the venting. But, those were what I truly felt at the time. I guess to most people, I am indeed a very uncaring individual.
 
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W

Worthless_nobody

Enlightened
Feb 14, 2019
1,384
Not going to lie I dont care much anymore but I do care about a few people/animals in my life. I do tend to care about people who are going thru the same things I am because we can relate to each others pain. Honestly my past has made me extremely jaded and caring about someone who didn't deserve it brought on a lot of my problems. It's just so hard to feel emotions and care a lot of the time. I have more apathy towards everything now.
 

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