How to stop being lazy to CTB/Does my plan sound fine?

[ccake]

- Clean Room and position everything nicely

- Create note
1 For family (Irl)
1 For friends (Online)

Wait for my parents to leave to go somewhere with each other and use one of these methods

Firearm
or
Running away from home to find a high place to jump from (I'll most likely have already chosen the place before I run away)

Send a goodbye message to friends then take my leave.

For clarification I am extremely sheltered hence why my parents have a lot to do with this, I don't really go outside or anything so me simply stepping foot out the door will raise a ton of suspicious already. I could make some excuse like "I just want to go on a walk" which will 100% work

The problem with my plan is that I've just been too lazy to execute it. I just lay in bed all day or get on my pc and do random shit as a way of trying to numb my emotions, I am fully ready to ctb I just have no motivation

I have 1 more thing left that I feel like will make me hold on for a little longer but I'm not sure yet.

 

[purpleuser]

Actually, there are two effective ways to get rid of such a thought.

1. Get drunk, almost to the point of passing out

2. Buy a powerful pre-trainer and exceed the normal dosage.


On the other hand, do you have enough time?