Help How to put Suicide behind oneself?

[Janeツ]

I truly want to be okay, but sometimes it's hard to remember, especially whenever you hit rock bottom again. Just two months ago I felt hyped to work on myself. I planned on burning my rope and my Xanax as a symbol for moving on and leaving everything behind. Doesn't work that way I assume. The last few weeks were hard and I caught my self-fantasizing about suicide a lot. It's like a safe harbor, I can't help it! Having these things gives me some sort of control and safety.

What do you guys think about this whole "burning these things as a symbol for putting something behind oneself"? How can I finally let go of the idea of talking my life? I don't want to have THIS as safety plan in the back of my mind all the time.

 

[catflowers]

dude you gotta write down a safety plan if you are putting a noose to your neck just trust me it does wonders for depression

 

[Coffeebean77]

I get the rope part, but maybe you shouldn't burn your Xanax. You might need it in the future.

I wish I could give advice on putting suicidal thoughts behind you, but I'm having the same issue.

 

[timf]

Sometimes people make a complete change of direction in their life in one step. Others of us may take several tries to slowly make a change. The fact that you had a recent up period is a good sign that you may be able to gain more control and set a path that brings you to recovery.

Rather than holding on to the means of suicide as a backup plan,. you may wish to use a plan that offers an alternative like calling or staying with friends, taking a brief trip to another city, or even checking in to a hotel for a few days of indulgence.

The alternative plan may help reduce seeing suicide as your plan "A".