How to make suicide letter cause the least amount of guilt? Lying?

[cait_sith]

I am in the "happy" position that both my parents are dead and I am an only child so I have no close family members left that I could feel guilty over when I ctb, but there is the girlfriend of my father left who knew me since I was child and helped me a lot since my father died in 2015 and I know she will be very sad when I leave, although we only meet every other month now. I am thinking a lot about how I could write the letter and I worry about how I am unable to write my real reasons without her feeling guilty about not telling me enough that I'm "worthy" or whatever the things are people think that could help with when somebody hates themself and want to die because they are a genetic failure. When I talk with that person on the phone I started mentioning that I have a lot of pain, which is not a lie, but I am playing it up a bit with the intention to later write in the letter that I did ctb because I'm so much pain (which is also a reason, but a small one in comparison to the other ones) but she will probably know I am lying and it's a stupid idea but I don't know what else I should do. What do you think about this approach, what would you do/ what will you do when you write your letter, or have you maybe written it and can you maybe write some ideas on how to word the letter to make person feel the least amount of guilt , that it wouldn't matter what they did etc. I know it's impossible to control their feelings but I want to try to make this as painless as possible for her.

Thank you!

 

[sugarh1gh]

Yeah, people who cared about you are going to feel guilty no matter what you say, but I guess if you leave letter saying them being happy and not feeling guilty will make you peaceful could help. They will overcome the guilt over time.

I would personally just say they have done everything they can and did their best.

 

[Onelegman]

This is a copy of another message that I put in a very similar post, I hope it helps you.

I have recorded many videos, some to say goodbye, explain what was happening to me and ask for forgiveness. Others are help or tutorials to be able to use the computer and watch those videos, also to do procedures online, such as making an appointment with the doctor... things like that. I understand you a lot, people who you don't see often but who appreciate you will have many questions and you would like to be able to answer the most important ones. Say goodbye to one or the other, thank you, anything.

I have a letter with instructions so they know where to find those videos and discover the answers. Also another with passwords that you will need at some point. But the important thing is the videos, nothing better for your loved ones than being able to see and hear you whenever they want. Nothing very robotic, just sit down and talk to the camera as if you were talking to them, even making a joke, so that they don't lose the sound of your laughter.

These videos have several backup copies in case something fails on the computer or USB.

Don't be ashamed to leave a simple note or leave absolutely nothing, it's your life and you decide. But if you appreciate someone who will leave you very hurt, try to make it clear that you appreciated them too.

 

[the_last_race]

It won't matter, the universe ceases to exist with your consciousness

 

[Traveller12724]

I am in the "happy" position that both my parents are dead and I am an only child so I have no close family members left that I could feel guilty over when I ctb, but there is the girlfriend of my father left who knew me since I was child and helped me a lot since my father died in 2015 and I know she will be very sad when I leave, although we only meet every other month now. I am thinking a lot about how I could write the letter and I worry about how I am unable to write my real reasons without her feeling guilty about not telling me enough that I'm "worthy" or whatever the things are people think that could help with when somebody hates themself and want to die because they are a genetic failure. When I talk with that person on the phone I started mentioning that I have a lot of pain, which is not a lie, but I am playing it up a bit with the intention to later write in the letter that I did ctb because I'm so much pain (which is also a reason, but a small one in comparison to the other ones) but she will probably know I am lying and it's a stupid idea but I don't know what else I should do. What do you think about this approach, what would you do/ what will you do when you write your letter, or have you maybe written it and can you maybe write some ideas on how to word the letter to make person feel the least amount of guilt , that it wouldn't matter what they did etc. I know it's impossible to control their feelings but I want to try to make this as painless as possible for her.

Thank you!

This is the line I will be using, I got it from some suicide note ""
"Please understand that me leaving is not a reflection of you, but the result of my own inability to turn myself for the better. Please remember me for the good memories we have shared, and never for my downfall. I will see you all again on the other side."

 

[cait_sith]

This is the line I will be using, I got it from some suicide note ""
"Please understand that me leaving is not a reflection of you, but the result of my own inability to turn myself for the better. Please remember me for the good memories we have shared, and never for my downfall. I will see you all again on the other side."

Good approach, but could cause guilt that they didn't do enough to help my inability to "turn myself for the better"

Yeah, people who cared about you are going to feel guilty no matter what you say, but I guess if you leave letter saying them being happy and not feeling guilty will make you peaceful could help. They will overcome the guilt over time.

I would personally just say they have done everything they can and did their best.

I think this is a good way, telling them upfront that they shouldn't feel guilty.

 

[ssplease]

Thank you so much for all you have done and been in my life. I wouldn't have made it so far without you. My biggest regret is that I don't know the words to say to ease your mind. I am finally at peace.