I think that becoming more socially active and meeting more people will help me recover. What are some ways I can get to know people quickly?
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whatevs
Mining for copium in the weirdest places.
- Jan 15, 2022
- 2,914
I'm in college now so I have no shortage of courses. However I will try to enroll in courses where there are more people in different majors so I can get to know more people.
I met almost all of my current friends though a local board gaming group. I'm not even that into board games, but its a good way to socialise cos if you're feeling nervous you can just focus on playing the games, but eventually you'll probably find people you like and who like you.
GentleJerk
Carrot juice pimp.
- Dec 14, 2021
- 1,372
Volunteer work. My friend met his gf at a volunteer-run organization that feeds the homeless.
Community Centers. They have all sorts of activities, classes and such. Most go there mainly to meet people rather than do pottery classes or whatever other some such thing they offer.
Bush doofs. Just sayin'.
The 'rona might have messed things up a bit though.
Community Centers. They have all sorts of activities, classes and such. Most go there mainly to meet people rather than do pottery classes or whatever other some such thing they offer.
Bush doofs. Just sayin'.
The 'rona might have messed things up a bit though.
What's been helping me is partying. It's a very slippery slope so if you have an addictive personality or family history of addiction, stay far far away from the party scene.
In my case I have social anxiety disorder and partying not only helps me loosen up and talk to others, but it gives you somethinh in common with many people.
In my case I have social anxiety disorder and partying not only helps me loosen up and talk to others, but it gives you somethinh in common with many people.
Antigonish
Mage
- Sep 19, 2020
- 593
This may sound crazy...
But just try opening up and talking to random strangers. Unfortunately there is not too many quick ways around it. Not to many people are keen on trust falling into the arms of a stranger.
Methodically getting to know them helps. And giving them proper chances they probably wouldn't give you.
But just try opening up and talking to random strangers. Unfortunately there is not too many quick ways around it. Not to many people are keen on trust falling into the arms of a stranger.
Methodically getting to know them helps. And giving them proper chances they probably wouldn't give you.
rudebeat
Member
- Dec 18, 2021
- 61
I'd start scanning through the list of student organizations for your college. Gaming clubs in general are probably going to be some of the most popular clubs with the most different people to meet. Even if you get bored of any of the gaming clubs they could be a good starting point to doing other stuff with people you meet there. I find playing video games as the easiest way to meet people because there's something happening in the game to talk about and you don't have to feel weird about times when you're silent.
If you don't play video games you at all though you can ignore everything I wrote after here.
If you don't play any of the games that are listed as having a club, a simple game to pick up could be Super Smash Bros. It's what I did back when I wasn't really that good at the game, but since it was one of the clubs with the most people attending there was enough people to play with no matter what your skill level was. Granted, this was at my college which had 20,000 people so I don't know if it will be the same for you.
If you don't play video games you at all though you can ignore everything I wrote after here.
If you don't play any of the games that are listed as having a club, a simple game to pick up could be Super Smash Bros. It's what I did back when I wasn't really that good at the game, but since it was one of the clubs with the most people attending there was enough people to play with no matter what your skill level was. Granted, this was at my college which had 20,000 people so I don't know if it will be the same for you.
There's a large list of student organizations in my college, but unfortunately there are no video game groups. I heard that some people tried to start a esports group but they were rejected by the school. Super Smash Bros isn't really popular in my country. People in my country play competitive mobile games the most, but I suck at them.
I was actually approached by a guy in math class. He seems like a friendly and smart person. So I guess this might work.
I try to join parties whenever I get the chance, but I have a hard time finding parties to join. I seem to be stuck in a loop. No social life -> no one invites me to parties -> no social life and so on.
I think these are all great ideas. I'm actually required to participate in volunteer work by my school so that's two birds with one stone.
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Do you live on-campus, or do you commute/live off-campus?
If you're on-campus, most universities have a "frat row" where you can walk by and go to a party. If you need ratio, you can meet people at a bus stop or online who might want to get in. You can also pay to get in, and as you meet people you can find a group to party with.
Another thing to try is barhopping!
I live on campus, and unfortunately universities in my country don't have it. Barhopping might be a good idea, but I'm worried about safety.
Ethereal Knight
Seja um bom soldado, morra onde vocĆŖ caiu.
- Jan 10, 2022
- 817
I find all the answers interesting. I like the idea of talking to people in real life, 'cause I don't think the internet is the same thing.
Tinder, Facebook etc have tried, but it's not even close. Telegram has created this feature called "People Nearby", which uses your location to scan for people who are near and find new friends, but if you don't actually message someone, probably nobody will message you. and they don't necessarily are there to make friends, many people are there to sell something or for no reason at all. Tinder is worse, needless to say.
in other words, the real life is still the best place to talk.
plus all online socialization can make you not work on your real-life social skills. and that's not good. these skills require training and you can't stop using them for too long or you lose them.
many of the things that make us grow are unconfortable. it's normal.
I think a possibility is exercising together. if you have a bike, you can call people who like to bike and go biking together. it doesn't hurt the knees as running does, it's not as dangerous as crossfit, jiu jitsu etc, it's a reasonable activity. but pretty much all exercise is great, you just have to find something that you actually enjoy, so this way your chances of sticking to it long-term are greater.
in my city you can often see people biking or jogging together. it's very common here.
if you think about it, things that don't involve alcohol or drugs are interesting because, first, you get to know how people are when they sober, and second, you're less likely to find people that are there just to party, get high, flirt and have sex. these things I just said are exactly what I found when trying to make friends in the context of parties. they're there for a reason and usually the reason is flirting and sex, or getting high.
Tinder, Facebook etc have tried, but it's not even close. Telegram has created this feature called "People Nearby", which uses your location to scan for people who are near and find new friends, but if you don't actually message someone, probably nobody will message you. and they don't necessarily are there to make friends, many people are there to sell something or for no reason at all. Tinder is worse, needless to say.
in other words, the real life is still the best place to talk.
plus all online socialization can make you not work on your real-life social skills. and that's not good. these skills require training and you can't stop using them for too long or you lose them.
many of the things that make us grow are unconfortable. it's normal.
I think a possibility is exercising together. if you have a bike, you can call people who like to bike and go biking together. it doesn't hurt the knees as running does, it's not as dangerous as crossfit, jiu jitsu etc, it's a reasonable activity. but pretty much all exercise is great, you just have to find something that you actually enjoy, so this way your chances of sticking to it long-term are greater.
in my city you can often see people biking or jogging together. it's very common here.
if you think about it, things that don't involve alcohol or drugs are interesting because, first, you get to know how people are when they sober, and second, you're less likely to find people that are there just to party, get high, flirt and have sex. these things I just said are exactly what I found when trying to make friends in the context of parties. they're there for a reason and usually the reason is flirting and sex, or getting high.
stellabelle
ethereal
- Dec 14, 2018
- 3,919
Drugs or alcohol. Not that those are "healthy" by any means but that seems to be the only way people socialize nowadays.
Alcohol maybe. The country I live in has very strict drug laws so I don't really know anyone who uses drugs IRL.
CometDustBear
New Member
- Feb 23, 2022
- 4
A lot of good ideas here!
This one is a weird idea, not for everyone, but I have made friends and been in nice communities through language learning classes. If you get the right teacher (a teacher who cares and is passionate about the language and teaching it) you can have a lot of fun and meet other classmates who may also be passionate about language learning. It can be awkward but oftentimes you do get to collaborate with others and maybe laugh together when trying to pronounce tough words. It can be a bit scary when you suddenly have to talk to someone (sometimes in a language you're both learning!) but it opens up opportunities to bond, have nice interactions and even make friends you may talk & hangout with outside class!
If you are interested in learning a new language then not only will you learn a new way to engage with others in the future but you just get to be in a social and (hopefully) positive environment while learning!
I miss my Spanish class everyday, I think it really helped me grow my talking & social skills, both in English & Spanish haha
Good luck btw, I hope you find some cool people! 'Rona has made things tough but there is still opportunities to meet others, make friends or just simply have nice moments with someone. Good luck, stay strong, stay safe & eat good food too!
This one is a weird idea, not for everyone, but I have made friends and been in nice communities through language learning classes. If you get the right teacher (a teacher who cares and is passionate about the language and teaching it) you can have a lot of fun and meet other classmates who may also be passionate about language learning. It can be awkward but oftentimes you do get to collaborate with others and maybe laugh together when trying to pronounce tough words. It can be a bit scary when you suddenly have to talk to someone (sometimes in a language you're both learning!) but it opens up opportunities to bond, have nice interactions and even make friends you may talk & hangout with outside class!
If you are interested in learning a new language then not only will you learn a new way to engage with others in the future but you just get to be in a social and (hopefully) positive environment while learning!
I miss my Spanish class everyday, I think it really helped me grow my talking & social skills, both in English & Spanish haha
Good luck btw, I hope you find some cool people! 'Rona has made things tough but there is still opportunities to meet others, make friends or just simply have nice moments with someone. Good luck, stay strong, stay safe & eat good food too!
Sherri
Archangel
- Sep 28, 2020
- 13,794
ok what im about to say to help you is not healthy, but you don't have smoke, the best colleagues I made we created a bond by hanging 10mn in tge smoking area, even if you don't smoke is ok, but they are usually the coolest colleagues at work, not because they smoke but you create a bind each time you join them, then a beer after work, if you don't drink a coffee it's fine, just be yourself, when you first join them tell them you missed that smell. I vape now and still break the ice, good luck. Let me know how it goes.
