penguinl0v3s

penguinl0v3s

Wait for Me 💙
Nov 1, 2023
799
My recovery buddy is gone, and every day the guilt only settles in more.

He said that he would've liked to live if he were given the chance too. He would've wanted to live believed it was possible for him to live without suffering.

He said that he would never be able to recover from his disorder because he tried everything, but after his death I did more research about it and it seems like he was wrong. Everyone recovers from it if given enough time… why didn't I figure this out earlier…

I am not sure what to think now, because it seems like my negligence robbed him of a life that he wished for.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: Dangerdonkey333, Sad Paradise and tiger b
tiger b

tiger b

AI without the I
Oct 24, 2023
1,236
I don't know if this will be of use, but let's see.

I was given poor information on a medical condition from a doctor. Because of this, I suffered a complication that was preventable - ironically while trying things to improve my health.

Ultimately the responsibility was mine because I didn't educate myself on my own condition. And I could have double checked before trying things. We all know medical advice can be patchy.

Hindsight is a great thing. You took his word and why would you doubt his own knowledge of his condition? If things were the other way round, would you want your buddy feeling guilty?

I am sorry for your loss.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: Dangerdonkey333, Sad Paradise, penguinl0v3s and 1 other person
Sad Paradise

Sad Paradise

She told me that love is not enough
Nov 21, 2023
12
I deeply regret learning about your recovery buddy's loss. It's clear that you care deeply for him, and it's natural to feel a mix of emotions, including guilt and a sense of responsibility. It's important to acknowledge that you did your best with the information available at the time.

Discovering more about recovery after his death is a difficult realization, and it's okay to feel a range of emotions. Remember that you were there for your friend, providing support during a challenging journey.

Grief is a complex process, and it's okay to seek comfort and understanding. Don't try to shoulder all the blame to feel better about it; I'm sure you did what you could...

I'm sorry for your loss.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: Dangerdonkey333, penguinl0v3s and tiger b
penguinl0v3s

penguinl0v3s

Wait for Me 💙
Nov 1, 2023
799
I don't know if this will be of use, but let's see.

I was given poor information on a medical condition from a doctor. Because of this, I suffered a complication that was preventable - ironically while trying things to improve my health.

Ultimately the responsibility was mine because I didn't educate myself on my own condition. And I could have double checked before trying things. We all know medical advice can be patchy.

Hindsight is a great thing. You took his word and why would you doubt his own knowledge of his condition? If things were the other way round, would you want your buddy feeling guilty?

I am sorry for your loss.
I'm upset that he gave up because meds and therapy didn't work on him. I think society overemphasizes the value of healthcare when it comes to mental disorders, but most of the work actually comes from yourself, friends, and family. Meds and therapy did not work for me either. It was his friendship and support that cured me. So why couldn't I cure him? While disassociation can be hell, it looks like people who suffered agree that it eventually goes away for everyone, maybe after a few years.

You are right though, I have hindsight only now. These thoughts never even crossed my mind when he was alive, and I doubt that they would've had he not died. I was afraid of giving him false hope.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: tiger b

Similar threads

Cyber4ngel!
Replies
2
Views
257
Suicide Discussion
Cyber4ngel!
Cyber4ngel!
bye_forever
Replies
8
Views
316
Suicide Discussion
selfsabotagequeen
S
S
Replies
9
Views
168
Offtopic
CatLvr
C