M
mexican_patty
Member
- Apr 9, 2024
- 10
I've thought about CTB for years, and this year the ideas have come stronger and stronger. I've talk to myself for hours on end, my best choice is to die, I feel useless, incapable of doing anything, including being at peace. But there's something that stops me. I have SN, I never have the courage to drink it. I just want to die, but I always end up thinking about my friends, or my family, or my pets, or things as simple as movies and books and music. But I don't want to think about any of that, I want to detach so I can just focus on myself and what's best for me. My best friend is moving overseas in a couple of weeks, he was my biggest support. I want to die before having to say goodbye to him, but I'm scared. How can I accept my own death? I'm obsessed with it, I've been thinking about it for years, every single day, but I can't manage to do it. I'm drained. How can I just do so?