since i was 11, so over half my life at this point.. and i always had bad anxiety even before that for as far back as i can remember, at least. still, all my combined mental issues have just stolen... well, everything? depression, social anxiety, and an eating disorder basically turned me into a husk. my teenage years are mostly a blur, i didn't have fun or friends, i just worried about food and what people thought of me and hated myself. and not much has changed i guess, but now i also have debilitating OCD that developed in the early years of the pandemic and just completely halted my already slow, strained progress in life. i feel like i was barely able to keep my head above water as it was, and the trauma built up in my body that was never let out over all those years just broke my brain and body.