How many years have you been suffering from suicidal thoughts ?

[Buddha.e.c]

I been dealing with suicidal thoughts ,depression and anxiety for 11.5 years now.
How long have you guys had these thoughts for ?

 

[elfin]

around 14 years

 

[pphelpme]

I've wanted to die since I was 4. That's 4 decades. I've tried four times and failed over those decades. My last effort to CBT was in November. I'm going blind, I have PTSD and bipolar and have panic disorder. I can't handle all these things anymore.

 

[Buddha.e.c]

around 14 years

I know personality its very hard to deal with for more then a decade . 14 years wow very long time to be in pain

 

[slagiatt]

Oh God, probably 17 years. I remember either middle or high school keeping a rope hidden and testing it on the I beams in the basement.

Attempted 12 years ago, but unfortunately had moved out by then, no basement, nothing to fully suspend from, so failed

 

[elfin]

I know personality its very hard to deal with for more then a decade . 14 years wow very long time to be in pain

11 and a half years is a long time too :( sending best wishes

 

[olkf]

Heck if I know, if I had to guess 7 years

 

[Mr2005]

You might think it's 17 but it's actually 'only ' 12

 

[pphelpme]

I'm bipolar so I only was suicidal on and off. But in the last five years it's been really intense. And now that I'm going blind I'm in a hurry to do it.

 

[Buddha.e.c]

I've wanted to die since I was 4. That's 4 decades. I've tried four times and failed over those decades. My last effort to CBT was in November. I'm going blind, I have PTSD and bipolar and have panic disorder. I can't handle all these things anymore.

I know how hard it can be to just want to end it all. Everyday to feel like shit everyday when you wake up because deep down i know im not "getting better ". Also im sorry for the pain you are in its not fair that you live with so much stress and discomfort i wish you the best hope that it goes well.

 

[Treeline589]

Ever since I was 12.... I am now 47

 

[Buddha.e.c]

Oh God, probably 17 years. I remember either middle or high school keeping a rope hidden and testing it on the I beams in the basement.

Attempted 12 years ago, but unfortunately had moved out by then, no basement, nothing to fully suspend from, so failed.

I know how hard it could feel especially when you expect to be successful and fail at a attempt . Ive had i similar experience with a rope and basement setting and failed as well i send you my wishes hope it goes well soon for you .

Ever since I was 12.... I am now 47

Wow thats a long time so much pain and suffering. Honestly im in my early 20s i dont know if i have that long

 

[pphelpme]

I know how hard it could feel especially when you expect to be successful and fail at a attempt . Ive had i similar experience with a rope and basement setting and failed as well i send you my wishes hope it goes well soon for you .

Wow thats a long time so much pain and suffering. Honestly im in my early 20s i dont know if i have that long

Why did you fail with the rope? I'm thinking of hanging myself. I just started thinking about it so I've just started asking questions and researching questions.

 

[Buddha.e.c]

Why did you fail with the rope? I'm thinking of hanging myself. I just started thinking about it so I've just started asking questions and researching questions.

I knew nothing about how to properly execute the hanging method sadly i was rushing the method

 

[DunnoWhyButYeah]

23.

 

[FuneralCry]

In my case, I have never wanted to be alive. Even when I was very young, I found death to be comforting and I could never quite understand people who wanted to live. I started to actually think of ctb when I was around 11 and I remember I started to see everything as hopeless and I just wanted to escape from this life. As the years have gone by, I have became more and more suicidal. I am now 21. I would not say that I suffer with suicidal thoughts, in fact I find suicidal thoughts to be quite comforting. Suicide is the only thing that makes sense for me, I am not meant for this world.

 

[thisplaceisaprison]

10 years? Off and on, after I hit 25 and went homeless for the first time and even after moving back into an apartment after 3/4 months of homelessness

 

[Buddha.e.c]

In my case, I have never wanted to be alive. Even when I was very young, I found death to be comforting and I could never quite understand people who wanted to live. I started to actually think of ctb when I was around 11 and I remember I started to see everything as hopeless and I just wanted to escape from this life. As the years have gone by, I have became more and more suicidal. I am now 21. I would not say that I suffer with suicidal thoughts, in fact I find suicidal thoughts to be quite comforting. Suicide is the only thing that makes sense for me, I am not meant for this world.

I know your pain i was around that age 12 years old for me im 22 now . Its honestly terrible having thoughts that drain you especially around that age .Thats why i think im so broken because i tried to put bandaids over the pain like medication on a never closing wound aka- depression & suicidal thoughts

 

[BitterlyAlive_]

14 years? :|

I've wanted to die since I was 4. That's 4 decades. I've tried four times and failed over those decades. My last effort to CBT was in November. I'm going blind, I have PTSD and bipolar and have panic disorder. I can't handle all these things anymore.

Oh my goodness. I'm sorry life has been so painful.

 

[Buddha.e.c]

10 years? Off and on, after I hit 25 and went homeless for the first time and even after moving back into an apartment after 3/4 months of homelessness

This life is suffering its not meant for me. What is life if one cannot be happy living it .I wish you the best hope it goes well.

 

[Jack4230]

Way too long

 

[pphelpme]

In my case, I have never wanted to be alive. Even when I was very young, I found death to be comforting and I could never quite understand people who wanted to live. I started to actually think of ctb when I was around 11 and I remember I started to see everything as hopeless and I just wanted to escape from this life. As the years have gone by, I have became more and more suicidal. I am now 21. I would not say that I suffer with suicidal thoughts, in fact I find suicidal thoughts to be quite comforting. Suicide is the only thing that makes sense for me, I am not meant for this world.

I know there a lot of people you're age on here. I'm 52. I've have lived a lot of good things but that's because I'm bipolar and had some good times. I wish you were able to live a little first. But I feel for your suffering. I do have some peace being committed to CBT because I have lived a little first. I hope whatever you do works out well.

 

[Buddha.e.c]

Way too long

i know that feeling

 

[nolongerhuman]

About 10 years, started around the end of middle school when the anxiety started getting really bad

 

[yive]

nothing personal, but i suffer from life, not from "suicidal thoughts". life is the cause of all my problems, and until i was born, "i" didn't complain about anything. my goal is to eliminate the root cause of my suffering

 

[Al Cappella]

On and off for 42 years. Christ, that's a long time…

 

[ineedrope]

It comes and goes. I first thought about it at like 13

 

[unijow]

It started around 16 and didn't stop so far, I'm 23.

 

[Buddha.e.c]

nothing personal, but i suffer from life, not from "suicidal thoughts". life is the cause of all my problems, and until i was born, "i" didn't complain about anything. my goal is to eliminate the root cause of my suffering

Life even for the most rich and successful is hell let alone us .our unfortunate circumstances lead us to take our life in your own hands . the problem in my opinion is the presure society to live a "normal life "

 

[raghu1977]

Around 2 months. I was taking stock if my life, planning what needed to be done in 2022.

Then I realized there was just way too much crap. And not enough return for the effort.

I was a little scared of ctb because there are so many ways that shit can go wrong.

But after research - I figured that the 2 Ns can provide a relatively simple and pain free way to ctb.

So yeah - 2 months since I started. And 1 month to go