How many people do you think truly regret their failed attempts?

[Mbound]

You know those "I'm Glad I Failed" ads? I think by far the best pro-life argument is that a lot of people have attempted ctb and have gone on to lead better lives and been happy they didn't succeed, so conceivably that could be the case for anyone who's suicidal. The "permanent solution to a temporary problem" (I was also thinking today--a permanent solution to a temporary problem sounds like a pretty sweet deal to me--means that problem is never coming back!--but I guess no one's offering me a job at the sui hotline any time soon)

However, today I was thinking about what percentage actually regret their attempt(s). Obviously this site isn't a good sample size because we're all sad bastards, but it seems like there's a hell of a lot of people out there who wish their ctb attempts had been successful, and tons of people who try over and over again. I wonder if it's even the majority that are "glad they failed"?

I have never attempted. I've never even self-harmed in the traditional sense (though I would argue years of pointedly self destructive choices counts a bit). In my mind I have one chance, because if I failed...assuming I didn't end up a vegetable, the cat would be out of the bag and no one would ever treat me the same again and my chances of being able to go peacefully would plummet. But I do know a few people who have attempted and I mean, they're in therapy and school and seem to be doing somewhat well on meds. They seem like they might have a future. Obviously though, who ever really knows.

 

[Sanguinius]

I regret my failed attepts only in one sense: I wish I did't survive them.

 

[Monster]

Same as OP, pretty much.

 

[LastFlowers]

I have harmed myself to the degree I've been put in the psych ward but there were no true attempts ever made, it was more like an animal attacking itself after being cornered.
I only regret that I now have to be branded and basically have a Scarlett letter attached to my chest. Records. Otherwise I don't mind the scars. Perhaps bashing my head against a concrete wall was regrettable and running towards traffic quite desperate, but oh well. Just other incidents of being cornered.
There is a very narrow window when you are trapped in your own body, and it's very easy for someone to block.

I think the only regret I would have if I failed a true attempt would be if I ended up worse off in any way-which is usually inevitable if you fail-and that I did not succeed.
Will be interesting to see what others say.
Also my situation is for all intents and purposes-permanent. If it was short-lived and temporary, I wouldn't be doing this.
My suicide will also not be a solution to my problem, just an end to my mind having to deal with it.

When I CTB, I've got to eliminate as much possibility of failure as humanly possible. I wish it were as easy as pressing a button. When I look to suicide as my only escape, the worry of failing makes it feel like it's slipping through my fingers. And that's as scary as anything.

 

[TiredHorse]

Given that the single best predictive factor for whether someone will suicide is that they have made a previous attempt, I think the "I'm glad I failed" argument the Pro-Life loves so much distinctly lacks in statistical strength.

 

[Jean Améry]

You know those "I'm Glad I Failed" ads? I think by far the best pro-life argument is that a lot of people have attempted ctb and have gone on to lead better lives and been happy they didn't succeed, so conceivably that could be the case for anyone who's suicidal. The "permanent solution to a temporary problem" (I was also thinking today--a permanent solution to a temporary problem sounds like a pretty sweet deal to me--means that problem is never coming back!--but I guess no one's offering me a job at the sui hotline any time soon)

However, today I was thinking about what percentage actually regret their attempt(s). Obviously this site isn't a good sample size because we're all sad bastards, but it seems like there's a hell of a lot of people out there who wish their ctb attempts had been successful, and tons of people who try over and over again. I wonder if it's even the majority that are "glad they failed"?

I have never attempted. I've never even self-harmed in the traditional sense (though I would argue years of pointedly self destructive choices counts a bit). In my mind I have one chance, because if I failed...assuming I didn't end up a vegetable, the cat would be out of the bag and no one would ever treat me the same again and my chances of being able to go peacefully would plummet. But I do know a few people who have attempted and I mean, they're in therapy and school and seem to be doing somewhat well on meds. They seem like they might have a future. Obviously though, who ever really knows.

The dead don't speak, do they? The majority of those who survived probably had no business/no real reason to CTB in the first place. Both seem good reasons to call the statistics on this biased and the conclusion shaky at best. Not to mention I have little faith in any studies done in the field of psychiatry/clinical psychology. Those bastards have too much to gain by distorting the truth, their livelihood to begin with.

I think you are inquisitive and have the right attitude about CTB: don't act rashly, think things through, prepare thoroughly. Most of all: don't fail. As you mentioned the potential consequences are too grave.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

I regret my failed attepts only in one sense: I wish I did't survive them.

I feel the same … my only regret in my attempt was that I survived.

 

[Retched]

I don't know anything about being 'happy' after my attempt. Broke from medical bills, in awkward family situations, disparity, and continued depression seems about right. I have met some decent friends. On here. But as far as a new lease on life? Meh.

 

[Sanguinius]

just a thought of me:
if you were once in a psychiatric hospital because of suicidality, you only will be at least less stigmatisized and don't have to see a psychiatrist every week etc. if you say you regret it, it was by affect, you're better now and so on, at least here in swizerland.
may it be that they lie about their regrets?
may it be that they told them what they wanted to hear..
...because of fear from loosing their freedom?

 

[IMALB]

Based on everything I've read, it's about a clear draw - 50/50. I have my plans made and everything on hand - if I fail I will be un-happy.

 

[PatKat]

You know those "I'm Glad I Failed" ads? I think by far the best pro-life argument is that a lot of people have attempted ctb and have gone on to lead better lives and been happy they didn't succeed, so conceivably that could be the case for anyone who's suicidal. The "permanent solution to a temporary problem" (I was also thinking today--a permanent solution to a temporary problem sounds like a pretty sweet deal to me--means that problem is never coming back!--but I guess no one's offering me a job at the sui hotline any time soon)

However, today I was thinking about what percentage actually regret their attempt(s). Obviously this site isn't a good sample size because we're all sad bastards, but it seems like there's a hell of a lot of people out there who wish their ctb attempts had been successful, and tons of people who try over and over again. I wonder if it's even the majority that are "glad they failed"?

I have never attempted. I've never even self-harmed in the traditional sense (though I would argue years of pointedly self destructive choices counts a bit). In my mind I have one chance, because if I failed...assuming I didn't end up a vegetable, the cat would be out of the bag and no one would ever treat me the same again and my chances of being able to go peacefully would plummet. But I do know a few people who have attempted and I mean, they're in therapy and school and seem to be doing somewhat well on meds. They seem like they might have a future. Obviously though, who ever really knows.

I regret living all 3 times I just did more damage to myself each time. Wish it would just be done.

 

[LifeIsNotFun]

The only reason my first attempt failed is because the cops found me. Some random stranger saw my car, and if I hadn't found me, I wouldn't be here. I really hate the guy who saved me. I know he had good intentions, but he had no idea what I was/am going through. The paramedics said if they were five minutes late, my heart would have stopped.

 

[not_a_robot]

You know those "I'm Glad I Failed" ads? I think by far the best pro-life argument is that a lot of people have attempted ctb and have gone on to lead better lives and been happy they didn't succeed, so conceivably that could be the case for anyone who's suicidal. The "permanent solution to a temporary problem" (I was also thinking today--a permanent solution to a temporary problem sounds like a pretty sweet deal to me--means that problem is never coming back!--but I guess no one's offering me a job at the sui hotline any time soon)

However, today I was thinking about what percentage actually regret their attempt(s). Obviously this site isn't a good sample size because we're all sad bastards, but it seems like there's a hell of a lot of people out there who wish their ctb attempts had been successful, and tons of people who try over and over again. I wonder if it's even the majority that are "glad they failed"?

I have never attempted. I've never even self-harmed in the traditional sense (though I would argue years of pointedly self destructive choices counts a bit). In my mind I have one chance, because if I failed...assuming I didn't end up a vegetable, the cat would be out of the bag and no one would ever treat me the same again and my chances of being able to go peacefully would plummet. But I do know a few people who have attempted and I mean, they're in therapy and school and seem to be doing somewhat well on meds. They seem like they might have a future. Obviously though, who ever really knows.

I thought the "better lives" they get after are just becoming paid crusaders against suicide.
"I was a jobless total loser and wanted to die til I blew half my face off in a suicide attempt, now at least I have a job telling kids of my mistake, and I am so happy to be alive!"

Surviving doesn't change anybody's circumstances that led them to want to ctb in the first place. At most being so close to death terrifies them into wanting to live, which is great if their lives actually improve.
I just don't know how realistic it is, unless maybe their lives just weren't very bad to begin with.
I would be curious to talk to some but the ones I've heard speak all sound like they're reading scripts.
"I was wrong to want to die. Now life is wonderful because I lived."

I think the survivors also tend to have less-than-serious attempts to begin with, because they don't bother to research a foolproof method, they act all dramatic then choose a method that couldn't kill them anyway.
I think most survivors were just cries for help.
People who are serious research,the way we do. Nobody here is gonna eat half a box of Claritin and claim a "suicide attempt".

 

[sad_frog]

This is a really hard question..
About 5 years ago (at 18yo) I got one foot on the bus. I had taken many meds and fell asleep in the woods on the train track. When I started to get sleepy from the medication I was terrified, adrenaline kicked in and I "regretted" my decision. I woke up 3 days later in the hospital very happy to be alive.

But I never got better. I think I'm more depressed now than I was back then. I'm scared of trying to ctb again because of the extreme terror I had before I fell asleep.

I both do and don't regret it.
I don't regret it because if I didn't do it then I would have tried a different time. I do regret the PTSD that followed.
Do I regret that I failed? At the time 'no' but I don't know if I cared about these years I've been alive since then.. Hope this answers your question.

 

[First loss]

I don't know man. I regret nothing. In fact, I am really sad that I failed. I would be one with nothing right now if things went as planned.

 

[WaterUnder]

In my opinion suicidality varies widely from the vague I-hate-my-present-circumstances-and-don't-know-how-to-deal to the abject rejection of one's life. There are many different actions which qualify as attempted suicide.

Someone I know of swallowed a bottle of Tylenol, another person I do know swallowed a bottle of anti-depressants. They both then called for help immediately. These were suicidal "gestures", which in no way should be taken lightly. The latter regretted the attempt, the former I don't know.

Then there was me with the fasting, anti-emetics, and shitload of CNS depressants. Person came home unexpectedly early, I win in a coma for days. I regret nothing other than failing the attempt.