Do you think that recovery is possible for you? Do you want to recover or just to die already?

  • I think that recovery is possible and I want it.

    Votes: 30 25.0%
  • I think that recovery is possible, but I don' want it.

    Votes: 7 5.8%
  • I don't think that recovery is possible, but I wish I could recover.

    Votes: 44 36.7%
  • I don't think that recovery is possible and I don't want it.

    Votes: 11 9.2%
  • I don't know.

    Votes: 21 17.5%
  • Whatever

    Votes: 7 5.8%

  • Total voters
    120
Cosmic dust

Cosmic dust

Among the stars
Feb 28, 2022
151
How many of you think that recovery is still possible for you? Do you wanna recover? Have you just given up already and is just waiting for death? Discuss.
 
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Al_stargate

Al_stargate

I was once a pretty angel
Mar 4, 2022
739
Kinda hard for me to come back mentally due to an injury. I would love to though. I would also like to die but ctb scares me, but in the end, I might have to resort to that.
 
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motel rooms

motel rooms

Survivor of incest. Gay. Please don't PM me.
Apr 13, 2021
7,084
No, I don't think a full recovery is possible for me; I'm mentally ill, not crazy. :hihi: Fortunately, I'm not obsessed with things I can't have & neither is my partner.
 
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D

DynamicDepression

Deranged
Mar 28, 2022
352
I don't think recovery is possible for me, no matter how much I wish it could be. Too much is fundamentally wrong to hope for a miracle.
 
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Cosmic dust

Cosmic dust

Among the stars
Feb 28, 2022
151
I am the person who voted in the first option.

I don't think that recovery is impossible for me, just unlikely, there are some things that we simply have no control over. I wanna die, but only for the pain to cease, if I could instead find a way to live, it would be preferable.
 
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Darkover

Darkover

Angelic
Jul 29, 2021
4,658
good luck fixing a brain injury modern medicine can't even detect a mild traumatic brain injury, so no recovery isn't possible for me but i do wish i could get better and continue living my life but thats never going to happen so this is goodbye
 
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newave3

newave3

I want out
Nov 21, 2020
2,795
You will recover if you keep listening to this song.

 
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Huntfish34

Huntfish34

Enlightened
Mar 13, 2020
1,622
I believe it's Possible but not probable. My hope for recovery has been fading and fading.
 
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fatefulstillness

fatefulstillness

ghost.
Oct 24, 2021
151
Full recovery is not possible for me and I don't want it anymore. I refuse to keep chasing something that only fades away. Every day I fight for the hope that I can still do something good with what's left of me, but I can't see it lasting too long.
 
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FatalSystemError591

FatalSystemError591

{He/They}
Oct 12, 2020
229
It is possible for others but I consider myself too far gone. Wish I could remain optimstic but all that is left is just to figure out a way to cope until I die/CTB
 
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S

silent staring void

Student
Jan 22, 2020
145
What exactly does recovery even mean? Liking life? Just not planning to kill yourself? Not having your mental/physical illness anymore?
 
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natali4

natali4

Student
May 24, 2021
147
I don't know what full recovery means. Right now, I would like to go back to a certain point in time in my life where I was more mentally stable and had the energy to live. That's recovery for me at this point of my life.
 
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WhiteDespair

WhiteDespair

The Temporary Problem is Life
Oct 24, 2019
837
I stopped caring about "recovery" and just started living life. it works out for the most part.
 
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LookingforAnswers

LookingforAnswers

Student
Mar 15, 2022
113
I have tried too much to feel its possible. But would LOVE to if i could because i loved life prior
 
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WhiteDespair

WhiteDespair

The Temporary Problem is Life
Oct 24, 2019
837
I have tried too much to feel its possible. But would LOVE to if i could because i loved life prior
it's weird. it's like a struggle between the past self and the current self. like, old stuff is boring but new stuff requires effort. almost as if it's more learning to like life for what it is at the current time.
 
Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
21,057
I think recovery is possible for me, but in the same way that losing all my hair during a total eclipse on Arbor Day while listening to the Marine Corps Band playing Home on the Range and watching a Badminton match between two guys named Ichabod is also possible.
 
Lullaby

Lullaby

🌙
Mar 9, 2022
651
I'm not sure. Logically, I totally think if I put in the work, I could get to the point where I want to be, but I'm just tired now. I'm finally at the point where I'm genuinely trying to make an effort, but I'm exhausted from all the years of this.

Part of me wishes I had taken my treatment seriously when I was younger, maybe it would've made a difference.
 
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Cosmic dust

Cosmic dust

Among the stars
Feb 28, 2022
151
What exactly does recovery even mean? Liking life? Just not planning to kill yourself? Not having your mental/physical illness anymore?
Good question, I supose its subjective.

For me, to achieve a state where I am satisfied with life, at least enough to consider myself happy and to not want to kill myself. That implies improving my mental health, between other things.

I will never forget all the years of pain and life is never going to be perfect, but could be better.
 
Last edited:
gottablast888

gottablast888

Student
Apr 15, 2022
171
i wish i could be who i was before OCD and live for longer with my family and die after my parents but i cant cope with this
 
R

rattenkrieg

Member
Apr 24, 2022
9
I've gotten out of depression before so I think I can recover. Although everything seems very bleak right now, I know it's the depression making me feel like this.
 
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Al Cappella

Al Cappella

Are we there yet?
Feb 2, 2022
888
I'm in something from there's really no recovery per se, but it can certainly be managed to where it's not entirely ruinous. In theory, anyway…
 
N

noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
5,243
I think my chances for full recovery are 85 % no happy end, 15% a somewhat happy end.
I still think a rational suicide in my future is very likely. Life has humiliated me a lot. I am pretty sure the worst times are for me yet to come. It is sometimes very surreal. I think for me it is rational that the future will be way way worse. I am very dependent on my parents also financially, I think poverty will drive me to ctb.

Currently I sometimes can enjoy things. But I have extreme anxiety about the future. There are so many problems I cannot solve no matter how much energy I invest. I try my best but I think this game is rigged against me.

I am currently in recovery btw. I had a tiny success but I know this won't be enough to save me.

Though my worst time will probably be when my parents are dead. So this can take a while: I try to postpone my suicide, do escapism and try to win despite the odds are against me.
 
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Celerity

Celerity

shape without form, shade without colour
Jan 24, 2021
2,733
I think "recovery" is a misnomer that has set me up for disappointment. The idea that I could return to some undefined, pristine state of "before" is inspiring, but I think it's more like trying to bend plastic back into shape after you have dented it. You might get something approaching the original shape, but it won't ever be as strong as it had been, and you will have to handle it delicately. That vision of what is means to "recover" has to be good enough for me because it's all I have left. I've tried and failed too many times to return to some mythical life without depression; my damage is here to stay.
 
onlyanimalsaregood

onlyanimalsaregood

Unlovable 💔 Rest in peace CommitSudoku 🤍
Mar 11, 2022
1,329
I don't know what full recovery means. Right now, I would like to go back to a certain point in time in my life where I was more mentally stable and had the energy to live. That's recovery for me at this point of my life.
I'm doing the same. Taking a day by day.
 
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WorthlessTrash

WorthlessTrash

Worthless
Apr 19, 2022
2,415
I don't think that recovery is possible and I don't want it (for me).
 
author

author

they/them
Jul 13, 2021
76
I think recovery is possible, but not possible for me.
 
Hirokami

Hirokami

Out of order
Feb 21, 2021
607
I'll never be able to do a full recovery. The SI and urges to SH will always be there, even if I do manage to "recover" (just at a lower frequency). I'll always be at-risk, given how I've had this mindset and behavior for so long. Maybe my version of recovery is just a giant cope for the rest of my life, hoping that nothing sets me off.
 
WaterHemlock

WaterHemlock

Student
Dec 18, 2019
112
I had hope for a long time. I did try and fail and try again.
But I've only now realized what everyone else probably already knew. I'm a weird person who makes other people uncomfortable. And no amount of willpower is ever going to change that. And no amount of effort is ever going to make another person love me.
The only people that want to be around me want something.
It would take a miracle to make my life worth living now.
And stupid me, I'm still hoping for a miracle even as I'm preparing for death.
 
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