Funny enough when I'm at my lowest I come here and read and I find it calming in a way to know Im not completely alone in how I feel. This is about the only place I can stumble across posts that share my thoughts and feelings, and I come here because most people would treat me like shit, lock me up, or just avoid the subjects that literally circle in my mind regularly. It helps me in a way. I don't think anything in my life will ever get better, but its nice to know that I can say that and that people won't tell me I'm wrong. I dunno how long I will stick around.... here or in general. I came here searching for peaceful methods at my lowest point and then the month I planned to act on it, like literally a week before, someone I knew that was actually an incredibly amazing person did... a far better person than I could ever be who quite literally brought joy and laughs to thousands of people. I was pretty messed up after it and didn't have it in me, so I've just been taking one day at a time. Things have been extremely hard and discouraging in every possible way, but I quit all my meds as of about 2 months ago and I haven't been as depressed and I have been finding it easier to talk to others more-so than I have in years. When I'm down I come here, when I'm extremely pissed off at the world, I come here... Kinda fucked up, but this place is better therapy most of the time than anything else I've come across.