To start off this story, I first want to say I am not a 'pro-lifer' - this is just me saying if anyone has the ability to get mental health support, it'd do them good to take it, which seems like an uncommon view on this forum.
I grew up in an abusive household, got molested at 4, neglected, bullied through high school, put through the ringer. First suicide attempt at 16, during the COVID lockdown. After this I felt fine enough and carried on living well enough - up until a year later in August 2022. While on holiday in Turkey with family, I suffered a SEVERE psychotic break and experienced serious psychosis. I'm talking psychosis like the Austin Harouff case - I was walking around screaming "I want to eat people" in public, which obviously aroused concern in my family. I also was involved in a Neo-Nazi satanic cult named as The Order of Nine Angles. They had called the crisis team and I was now in the hands of the mental health team for CAMHS. I think if this weren't done, I would've lost my mind like Austin and genuinely killed and eaten someone.
Later it was revealed after a course of DBT and EMDR that I had BPD. At which point I was given antidepressants which helped for a while until I stopped taking them and haven't been on them for a while, at which point the suicidal thoughts came back and so did the attempts, but I still don't want to take them.
either way, if it wasnt for the intervention i had, someone else completely innocent would be dead. this basixally my way of saying that if you havent given support a good go, i think you should.
i dont know if writing this was a good idea, but i figure if it helps even just one person then it was worth it
Thanks for reading
I grew up in an abusive household, got molested at 4, neglected, bullied through high school, put through the ringer. First suicide attempt at 16, during the COVID lockdown. After this I felt fine enough and carried on living well enough - up until a year later in August 2022. While on holiday in Turkey with family, I suffered a SEVERE psychotic break and experienced serious psychosis. I'm talking psychosis like the Austin Harouff case - I was walking around screaming "I want to eat people" in public, which obviously aroused concern in my family. I also was involved in a Neo-Nazi satanic cult named as The Order of Nine Angles. They had called the crisis team and I was now in the hands of the mental health team for CAMHS. I think if this weren't done, I would've lost my mind like Austin and genuinely killed and eaten someone.
Later it was revealed after a course of DBT and EMDR that I had BPD. At which point I was given antidepressants which helped for a while until I stopped taking them and haven't been on them for a while, at which point the suicidal thoughts came back and so did the attempts, but I still don't want to take them.
either way, if it wasnt for the intervention i had, someone else completely innocent would be dead. this basixally my way of saying that if you havent given support a good go, i think you should.
i dont know if writing this was a good idea, but i figure if it helps even just one person then it was worth it
Thanks for reading
