Mixo
Blue
- Aug 2, 2020
- 773
I don't really leave the house much. Just stay indoors, watch videos on youtube, and try to learn programming. Also eat. Rinse, repeat. Don't speak to anyone, don't socialize.
I was content at home, I was content on a path of darkness I was comforted there, sitting just doing my own thinking, silently planning my CTB,
Now though I am forced to work, deal with people and hours of paperwork, I no longer have time to even have a shower, I have no time to think, I never get time alone now, I am stuck, I spend my day's ensuring other people are happy over my own contentment, I hate it so much!
Nowadays I've stumbled into the habit of waking up and playing league all day and then going to bed at an unreasonably late time. Rinse and repeat. I feel like shit constantly.
Before I'll have to go back to school-I've been spending my days at home mostly, sleeping till 3pm later playing games and playing with my bunny. Also eatingI don't really leave the house much. Just stay indoors, watch videos on youtube, and try to learn programming. Also eat. Rinse, repeat. Don't speak to anyone, don't socialize.
How do you sleep at night when you've slept through the day? I find it so hard to keep a sleeping routine and get up in the morning..I wake up at 9 everyday, either read or watch something for the day. Try to sleep through the day too. Rarely leave the house unless I'm taking my dog somewhere or getting groceries.
Really sorry to hear this.At this point I'm sleeping my life away cause I can't deal with my problems anymore. I've been housebound almost every day for the past 6 months cause of my backpain gotten worse around then with a very limited number of things to do like smoking, eating, looking at my phone or tv, reading a book, etc. It doesn't help that I don't enjoy literally anything at all let alone have any hobbies or interests at this point either. I hang out with my mom and brother whenever they're here but they work most of the time and whenever they are here I feel empty and unfulfilled around them in a way cause I can't do much with them or that they have somewhat boring lives also but atleast they're mobile. I'll go outside in the backyard sporadically whenever I'm awake either to go smoke or simply be outside to feel the wind, sun, and such since I don't go outside much anymore. My back limits me to about 30-40 minutes at most to be outside until I have to go back in to lay down for a bit before being able to go outside again kinda like recharging your batteries but the batteries are shit. Lately I've been trying to atleast go to a park that's near me just to get away even for a little bit. Since I can't walk much I'll just bring a seat to sit down next to my car and smoke then watch and zoned out looking at the trees, grass, bugs, birds, the sky, etc.. It does make me appreciate nature more but it's a very disheartening situation to experience. And that's basically it, pretty fucking depressing. It's driving me insane and making me even more suicidal cause I can't fathom living like this for years. Hell this took me 30 minutes to type that's how boring my life is now.
I dont really know, it doesn't matter how much sleep I get at night I always wake up at the same time. I wish I had a proper routine :/How do you sleep at night when you've slept through the day? I find it so hard to keep a sleeping routine and get up in the morning..
At this point I'm sleeping my life away cause I can't deal with my problems anymore. I've been housebound almost every day for the past 6 months cause of my backpain gotten worse around then with a very limited number of things to do like smoking, eating, looking at my phone or tv, reading a book, etc. It doesn't help that I don't enjoy literally anything at all let alone have any hobbies or interests at this point either. I hang out with my mom and brother whenever they're here but they work most of the time and whenever they are here I feel empty and unfulfilled around them in a way cause I can't do much with them or that they have somewhat boring lives also but atleast they're mobile. I'll go outside in the backyard sporadically whenever I'm awake either to go smoke or simply be outside to feel the wind, sun, and such since I don't go outside much anymore. My back limits me to about 30-40 minutes at most to be outside until I have to go back in to lay down for a bit before being able to go outside again kinda like recharging your batteries but the batteries are shit. Lately I've been trying to atleast go to a park that's near me just to get away even for a little bit. Since I can't walk much I'll just bring a seat to sit down next to my car and smoke then watch and zoned out looking at the trees, grass, bugs, birds, the sky, etc.. It does make me appreciate nature more but it's a very disheartening situation to experience. And that's basically it, pretty fucking depressing. It's driving me insane and making me even more suicidal cause I can't fathom living like this for years. Hell this took me 30 minutes to type that's how boring my life is now.