How do you leave the love of your life?

[Lena]

How do you leave someone who is so good to you and loves you with all his heart? I wanted to spend my entire life with him.

But I'm just suffering so much that I want to be gone. I can't stay here. But the last thing in the world I want to do is leave him.

 

[Lady black]

Maybe it´s best to say nothing, just leaving a letter that explains all, especially that you love him more than everything, but you had to suffer so much that nothing is this universe can make your life bearable

 

[Daystavro]

At least you have someone.
I am male 26 and never had any gf because of my social anxiety.
I only dated for a few dates with women I met online but it didn't develop anywhere.

That's one of the reasons I want to ctb, is because I have no social future and will never have a gf because of my social anxiety.

 

[Lena]

It's more painful than anything in the world leaving someone so good.
At this point in my life I wish I had no one but I suppose it is better to have loved and lost... I wouldn't trade our experiences...

I don't want him to hurt and I don't want to leave him alone...

Am I horrible for wanting to leave him? Am I just the worst most selfish person of them all...

 

[Lena]

Maybe it´s best to say nothing, just leaving a letter that explains all, especially that you love him more than everything, but you had to suffer so much that nothing is this universe can make your life bearable

I've alrwady said so much... he already knows...

 

[Lena]

At least you have someone.
I am male 26 and never had any gf because of my social anxiety.
I only dated for a few dates with women I met online but it didn't develop anywhere.

That's one of the reasons I want to ctb, is because I have no social future and will never have a gf because of my social anxiety.

I'm so sorry being along is so hard. It's all we need is love and family...

 

[AndyCurious]

How do you leave someone who is so good to you and loves you with all his heart? I wanted to spend my entire life with him.

But I'm just suffering so much that I want to be gone. I can't stay here. But the last thing in the world I want to do is leave him.

Good question.. It is hard for sure.. There is a quote though..: I love you so much, that I would die for you.. I have no good answer to this, as I know a persons pain can be way too much to handle..

 

[Lady black]

No you are not selfish. Someday one of you would have to face the fact that the other one has died, Maybe by suicide, maybe by an accident, maybe just a natural death. If he really loves you, he will understand what you will do and will let you go.

 

[AndyCurious]

I'm so sorry being along is so hard. It's all we need is love and family...

You got that right my friend <3 Hugs

 

[Daystavro]

I'm so sorry being along is so hard. It's all we need is love and family...

Yeah it sucks.
Again , having no gf is one of the reasons I want to ctb.

But you do seem to have it.
Is that your boyfriend ?

 

[AndyCurious]

It's more painful than anything in the world leaving someone so good.
At this point in my life I wish I had no one but I suppose it is better to have loved and lost... I wouldn't trade our experiences...

I don't want him to hurt and I don't want to leave him alone...

Am I horrible for wanting to leave him? Am I just the worst most selfish person of them all...

No, you are not even close to be horrible, or the worst most selfish out there.. I believe you are a wonderful person, unfortunately you have too much pain..

 

[Lena]

Good question.. It is hard for sure.. There is a quote though..: I love you so much, that I would die for you.. I have no good answer to this, as I know a persons pain can be way too much to handle..

Yeah if I love him so much that I would die for him why am I not willing to live a life of suffering for him?

 

[Lena]

Yeah if I love him so much that I would die for him why am I not willing to live a life of suffering for him?

Maybe because I can't enjoy life and I can't make him as happy as I want him to be...

 

[Lena]

No you are not selfish. Someday one of you would have to face the fact that the other one has died, Maybe by suicide, maybe by an accident, maybe just a natural death. If he really loves you, he will understand what you will do and will let you go.

I hope to see him again one day...

 

[Lena]

Yeah it sucks.
Again , having no gf is one of the reasons I want to ctb.

But you do seem to have it.
Is that your boyfriend ?

Yes we have been together for 7 years...

 

[Lena]

Yes we have been together for 7 years...

I'm just so ill...

 

[Lena]

No, you are not even close to be horrible, or the worst most selfish out there.. I believe you are a wonderful person, unfortunately you have too much pain..

I wish I didn't have it....

 

[Daystavro]

Yes we have been together for 7 years...

So why do you want to ctb?

I wish I had a gf for 7 years.

 

[Lady black]

Love is not the only thing that keeps a human alive. You can have the best partner but if you get too sick you will die...

 

[Lena]

So why do you want to ctb?

I wish I had a gf for 7 years.

I'm so so sick and miserable. Something so horrible happened to me.. I have had multiple brain injuries and then I went through some really extreme traumas. I've lost everything I was and all my joy and mental stability. I'm in so much pain emotionally and physically and I just can't take it anymore. I feel some have it worse than me and I am such a pussy for wanting to leave especially because I have such an amazing man in my life... I hate myself and I am so ashamed.

 

[Lena]

I made it worse because I let myself become depressed and I didn't take care of myself... my health is very fragile and when I stress and cry and don't take care of myself I make it worse.... I could have had a chance to turn it around but I didn't... really above anything else else this is my fault I am so awful... I never believed in Hell before all this but I had some crazy experiences that make me believe in God and the after life... and I really feel like I'm so awful that I'm afraid of hell... I hate myself....

 

[Lena]

I was always a happy person I never had issues with depression but now I'm just crazy and cry all the time... I can't take it anymore... I wish I could have been better... I wish it was easier to die... I wish I wouldn't be leaving my boyfriend by himself...

 

[AndyCurious]

Yeah if I love him so much that I would die for him why am I not willing to live a life of suffering for him?

Well, I may be right, and I may be wrong, but I think he can never be fully happy, when he see you in such pain and unhappy state 24/7..

 

[throwaway777]

To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer, to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy then is to suffer. But suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore to be happy one must love or love to suffer. Or suffer from too much happiness. (Woody allen)

ps. anyway i admire you because for me suffering for your love is the most noble thing of all ...

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[Lena]

To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer, to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy then is to suffer. But suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore to be happy one must love or love to suffer. Or suffer from too much happiness. (Woody allen)

ps. anyway i admire you because for me suffering for your love is the most noble thing of all ...

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You will not admire me for long..

 

[chapternate]

I don't know. I've been thinking about this a lot lately too. I love my girlfriend with all my heart, and I wish before I die I could go back to the start of our relationship and live it all over again, because she's everything to me.
I don't know if it's selfish to ctb, and leave the one you love behind. I know if someone did that to me I'd feel,,, abandoned. But I don't think any of us- not you, not me, not either of our partners- should have to live a life of suffering. I think it'd be even cruel-er to force myself to live just because I love her. I'd never want to internalise that angst, y'know? like "I'm alive for you, I'm putting myself through this suffering for you". It's so much better if I quit while I'm ahead, I can't go on anymore, and it's not her fault. But this way yeah,,, it'll hurt her. And I don't want to hurt her. But this way she gets to heal and to move on. I hope she finds someone who's not as much of a burden as I am, and makes her smile. Because there's nothing on this earth more important to me than that smile.
I don't know if this helped. but we're in kind of the same place here, and I hope sharing my own feelings was a comforting thing to do

 

[throwaway777]

You will not admire me for long..

i have a strange conception of love … i only hope that your person can understand your suffering and let you go ...

 

[Lena]

I don't know. I've been thinking about this a lot lately too. I love my girlfriend with all my heart, and I wish before I die I could go back to the start of our relationship and live it all over again, because she's everything to me.
I don't know if it's selfish to ctb, and leave the one you love behind. I know if someone did that to me I'd feel,,, abandoned. But I don't think any of us- not you, not me, not either of our partners- should have to live a life of suffering. I think it'd be even cruel-er to force myself to live just because I love her. I'd never want to internalise that angst, y'know? like "I'm alive for you, I'm putting myself through this suffering for you". It's so much better if I quit while I'm ahead, I can't go on anymore, and it's not her fault. But this way yeah,,, it'll hurt her. And I don't want to hurt her. But this way she gets to heal and to move on. I hope she finds someone who's not as much of a burden as I am, and makes her smile. Because there's nothing on this earth more important to me than that smile.
I don't know if this helped. but we're in kind of the same place here, and I hope sharing my own feelings was a comforting thing to do

You are so sweet... thank you for telling me this. I feel the same way but there is also an evil side of me that hates the fact that he will fall in love with someone else... but ultimately I want him to just be happy...

 

[Lena]

I don't think suicide is right... it's a sin... yes a forgivable sin... but I'm doing something wrong... and leaving behind heart break...

 

[Donewith_]

I am very sorry you are going through a lot of pain..Can see the self-hate, guilt stacked up in you. It feels heavy.You still love him.. you can't let him go. Did you let him know the issue you are facing