Weebster
Everyone is alone. Everyone is empty.
- Mar 11, 2022
- 1,683
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If you haven't yet, we highly encourage you to check out our Recovery Resources thread!
if you want the Buddha's answer, in brief it's by seeing things as they exist: they are compounded, impermanent, without inherent existence. In other words, they are "suffering." When we really understand this basic principle, our attachments are supposed to cease on their own. Easier said than done of course. One of the purposes of meditation in Buddhism is to observe the arising, persistence, and falling away of bodily and mental phenomena, so that we actually see the Buddha's thesis about the world in action and relate it to our own experience.
Morality is also supposed to play a role in this process. Cultivating things like nonviolence, generosity, truthfulness, and sobriety put the mind at ease and create a context in which insight meditation is more easily developed.
I can direct you to some books and even free ebooks if you're interested. There is staggering amount of Buddhist literature distributed for free online.
Morality is also supposed to play a role in this process. Cultivating things like nonviolence, generosity, truthfulness, and sobriety put the mind at ease and create a context in which insight meditation is more easily developed.
I can direct you to some books and even free ebooks if you're interested. There is staggering amount of Buddhist literature distributed for free online.
Assuming it is desired to break off a relationship that is toxic.
The simplest is a total break where there is no further contact. This requires the most resolve, and can require an environment where there is little chance of future encounters.
A less intrusive technique is a decrease in the frequency of connection such that other interests might be cultivated.
Some who are often unable to summon the resolve to initiate corrective steps often suffer until the other person loses interest and breaks things off.
The phrase "Once burned, twice shy" captures a little of what can be learned from bad experiences such that one becomes more skilled at early identification of toxic characteristics.
The simplest is a total break where there is no further contact. This requires the most resolve, and can require an environment where there is little chance of future encounters.
A less intrusive technique is a decrease in the frequency of connection such that other interests might be cultivated.
Some who are often unable to summon the resolve to initiate corrective steps often suffer until the other person loses interest and breaks things off.
The phrase "Once burned, twice shy" captures a little of what can be learned from bad experiences such that one becomes more skilled at early identification of toxic characteristics.
Curiously yesterday I was browsing the internet after Budism content. I'd be glad to know more if you want to give me some pointers.
Lost Magic
Illuminated
- May 5, 2020
- 3,145
I think attachment is suffering. It is very difficult to not be attached to things because our ego likes to cling onto stuff. Meditation and living a minimalist zen lifestyle will help though.
Weebster
Everyone is alone. Everyone is empty.
- Mar 11, 2022
- 1,683
Below are the sites I have consulted the most. They feature essays, study guides, recorded talks, and translations from the scriptures. There's tons of material here. These are all from the Theravada tradition, which is based on the Pali Canon. I would especially check out the "For Beginners" section at dhammatalks.org. If you like listening more than reading, there are several channels on YouTube presenting talks by Thanissaro Bhikkhu, an American monk ordained in the Thai tradition.
Teachings - Books - Forest Sangha
forestsangha.org
Access to Insight
SuttaCentral
Early Buddhist texts from the Tipitaka (Tripitaka). Suttas (sutras) with the Buddha's teachings on mindfulness, insight, wisdom, and meditation.
For a wider range of Buddhist traditions, the site below is decent. It's maybe not a good idea to read too widely at first. When I first got into Buddhism, I ended up confusing myself by reading too indiscriminately and not recognizing different schools of thought, which may use seemingly identical terms but really mean something quite different by them.
BuddhaNet eBooks: Welcome
BuddhaNet - Buddhist Information and Education Network: Buddhist Studies, World Buddhist Directory, BuddhaZine - Online Magazine. Insight Meditation Online, eBooks on Buddhism.
buddhanet.net
I admit it can be challenging reading the Buddhist scriptures. They were written in a style that will likely be strange to modern readers, reflecting their origin in oral accounts, and can be dense with unusual or technical terms that don't translate well. They can also be quite poetic and moving at times. It takes patience getting used to them. The first canonical Buddhist text I ever read was the Dhammapada, which made a great impression on me. This book can be read at any stage of Buddhist practice. I like the translation offered on buddhanet.net, "The Dhammapada: The Buddha's Path of Wisdom" best. Another excellent anthology is Bhikkhu Bodhi's "In the Buddha's Words," although it's not free (legally at least).
onlyanimalsaregood
Unlovable 💔 Rest in peace CommitSudoku 🤍
- Mar 11, 2022
- 1,329
Rosiel
Member
- Jan 24, 2019
- 45
Really great question - but attachment or desire is such a natural human state, it is not something you can avoid or choose not to feel. The only thing that works for me in all forms of attachment is to make decisions towards a state where you are trying to actively overcome your fears (i.e. fear of losing something, or fear of change, or fear of not getting what you want, etc.). Also, having a sense of certainty, that whatever happens is for the ultimate best. Easier said than done of course, but I find believing that our current experience is not base reality helps. It helped kept me going despite wanting to CTB for a while now.
Recently though, my desires and expectations from life have become more, that life breadcrumbing me is not enough and giving me temporary solutions is not enough, hence the renewed determination to just end it once and for all.
Recently though, my desires and expectations from life have become more, that life breadcrumbing me is not enough and giving me temporary solutions is not enough, hence the renewed determination to just end it once and for all.
