
Grumpy Bear
People are poison
- Jul 21, 2021
- 150
This is my description of my closest practice or attempt whatever you want to call it. Rewind 7 or 8 years ago. I had my own apartment and was alone and very drunk. Drunk enough that I would consider this a brown out or a spotty black out so details may not be 100% accurate. I decided to partial with a coaxial cable attached to a door handle. I placed my neck into the ligature. After a brief amount of time I had tunnel vision and my hearing was going out. I felt if I was there a second longer I would have fallen unconscious and nature would take its course. At that last second or two there were some contradictory elements. I felt the call of the void and the will to go but my SI overcame it just barely. I felt peaceful and fearful at the same time. So obviously I lifted my body up and out of the ligature at what felt like the last second. But here is the thing my face was red as a stop sign and a little purple for about two weeks afterward. I know that my face was like that because of petechial hemorrhaging which is a strong indicator of successful strangulation. So, my question is was I close and did I have the right technique?
I know my SI felt like it wasn't my time and I had unfinished business maybe. I almost feel that it is closer to my time to CTB so I feel my next attempt if I have one will be even more likely to succeed.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.
I know my SI felt like it wasn't my time and I had unfinished business maybe. I almost feel that it is closer to my time to CTB so I feel my next attempt if I have one will be even more likely to succeed.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.