Help How can I open up?

[peerlesscucumber]

I've been self-harming for 3~ years and I've never been found out.

I used to be very careful with where I cut, never going beyond the part of my upper thigh that my school uniform covers.
The problem is, this year I've lost control, my skin has gotten too hard so I was forced to go under.

Now my whole right leg is covered in scars, same with my left wrist.

Summer is coming up in my country and I'm 100% fucked.

Plus, I study in a very folkloric school, meaning we have to do mandatory dancing for independence day (September), and this year my class chose a Polynesian dance.

I'd like to open up to my family myself instead of them accidentally finding out, but I have no idea of what I should do or say, neither how or when I could approach the subject.

I know "just blurt it out" is a plan, but I prefer good plans yk... Plus, I've been trying to "blurt it out" for at least a year, hasn't worked at all yet

 

[Redleaf1992]

If you struggle to communicate these things with your parents you could try writing it down as a letter to them?

It also means they read your full feelings and what is going on before making a snap reaction.

 

[kinderbueno]

Write down a plan of what you're going to say and how you'll say it and where you'll say it. Make sure it's detailed so that you can be prepared for every kind of situation

 

[Grumble]

If you struggle to communicate these things with your parents you could try writing it down as a letter to them?

It also means they read your full feelings and what is going on before making a snap reaction.

Yes, absolutely write it down.

I'd suggest, also, preemptively answering any questions or concerns they might have.

So let's say, if all you stated was, "I've been self-harming for three years," what questions or concerns do you think they'd have in response to that information?

I'm guessing they're going to want to know if you're stable, if you're in any danger of escalating the self-harm, or if you're suicidal. They may want to know how they can help you or support you or if you'd be willing to see a doctor or a counsellor.

And... What do YOU want out of telling them about this? What do YOU want from them?

 

[spottem]

If you're unable to blurt it out, I'd take steps to practice opening up. I've been learning to slowly reveal things about myself to different people in my life the past couple of years, and it eventually gets easier.

 

[sos]

start by writing it down for yourself, it helps

it doesn't only reflect on your actions, but it also allows you to think and feel what you might have or might not have felt/thought before

that way you can eventually work up towards opening to others

but first you've got to open up to yourself

open up to the emotional rollercoaster you've been in and to understand what you wanna share w not only yourself, but most importanly w others