Discussion Hospitialisation experiences thread

[Lara Francis]

I know this is a topic that is of interest to many people and as new members join us,they are also curious to what we may face should our attempt fail.
I have been a patient on a psych ward a few times and was a compliant patient most of the time.
I wouldnt recommend the experience but i guess it saved my life.
My question is this.: if i am unlucky enough to find myself there again,i will refuse all things condusive to life including,food and water.
What would they do in these circumstances?.

 

[NoOneKnows]

they will give you food through nose with tubes

 

[Lara Francis]

Do they sedate u for this as i would fight ?

 

[Redrock]

force feed

 

[Lara Francis]

So wrong

 

[kohaku]

In my experience they just call paramedics to manhandle you if you resist, but I was at a youth ward back then.

I got put in a psych ward when I was 17. It was the most humiliating, dehumanizing experience in my life. I've been restrained to my bed three times for daring to speak against the nurses and have breakdowns. Whenever I'd have a sobbing breakdown, I'd be irritable and if I rightfully told the nurses to fuck off they'd forcibly restrain me for being "disrespectful". I've been injected with sedatives against my will before and we were allowed to request sedatives if we felt overly agitated, which wasn't a good way of treatment at all, tbh. I realized how good lorazepam felt. We were treated like lesser and it felt more like prison than a healing environment.

I've always been a rebellious type, so I got the short end of the stick. I kind of set an example for the ward of someone who doesn't take shit but a lot of them thought I was being stupid or crazy when I was wrestling the paramedics sent to restrain me that one time. I was there for almost 3 months because of this, both because I got involuntarily admitted and my mother didn't consider me stable enough to get me out. I was mostly in great distress while I was there, because of my distrust for other people. I've had periods of hiding in my bed scared of people and they'd deem me "unstable" for this and I had to force myself to get out of bed and socialize. Participating in activities and talking to other patients was how they considered you "stable".

I can tell you more about this if you'd ask, because youth wards here are way more interactive than adult wards.

 

[Jean Améry]

I know this is a topic that is of interest to many people and as new members join us,they are also curious to what we may face should our attempt fail.
I have been a patient on a psych ward a few times and was a compliant patient most of the time.
I wouldnt recommend the experience but i guess it saved my life.
My question is this.: if i am unlucky enough to find myself there again,i will refuse all things condusive to life including,food and water.
What would they do in these circumstances?.

They'll force a tube down your throat and force you to eat and drink. They will then pat each-other on the back exclaiming they have saved yet another life.

You don't have rights in psychiatry: the very idea of psychiatry is hostile to freedom.

If you do want to CTB you need to be free first. When in captivity play along with the enemy while cursing and mocking them in your head as much as you want. Make them believe they've achieved their goal and you're one of them now. Then they will let you go.

Fighting them any other way is no use since they will just keep you there longer and make you suffer even more abuses, all the while claiming to protect and restore your humanity and autonomy.

Do they sedate u for this as i would fight ?

They'll likely use a sedative on you yes. Or maybe use a straightjacket or put you in a padded isolation cell. The outcome will not be good.

Fighting is useless: you'll be outnumbered and have no chance in hell. I believe that's actually what they want you to do so they can use it as an excuse to medicate you heavily. They'll claim you are a danger to yourself and others therefore you're fair game.

 

[Walilamdzi]

If you object to something in a hospital in a way that the staff don't like, they inject you in the ass apparently. It never happened to me because I just went along with stuff, mainly.

 

[WOODESITY]

they will give you food through nose with tubes

That sounds horrible

 

[lyssanne]

i can speak from experience on my last hospitalization. i would not eat ,drink or get out of the bed. it was a voluntary addmisson but they were going to tube me and started talking of doing ect because to them the meds were not working if i was not functioning

 

[Jean Améry]

i can speak from experience on my last hospitalization. i would not eat ,drink or get out of the bed. it was a voluntary addmisson but they were going to tube me and started talking of doing ect because to them the meds were not working if i was not functioning

Thanks for sharing. This just goes to show that voluntary hospitalization really doesn't mean shit as they can still do whatever they want to you.

 

[Lara Francis]

i can speak from experience on my last hospitalization. i would not eat ,drink or get out of the bed. it was a voluntary addmisson but they were going to tube me and started talking of doing ect because to them the meds were not working if i was not functioning

I wouldnt like to have ect!
Jenna - hi x

 

[Jenna]

Hi @Lara Francis

I have been hospitalized. I live in the states. My experience is it's a big medication game. You are checked on every 15 minutes and you are searched as to not even have a shoe string. You may have an hour outside with supervision. I did put medications under my tongue to spit them later. In my opinion they seem to just keep you alive the time you are in them.

I did see people there that seemed to be helped.

I half suspect my experience was better than so many.

 

[crea_the_hopeless]

I was an inpatient as well as an outpatient at a few treatment facilities during my teens. Every experience was involuntary and a result of my self harm. Easily one of the worst experiences of my life. You're basically being babysat the entire day. We had to either socialize, look at magazines, or look at the tv that stayed on the same channel for hours on end. Then every so often throughout the day they made us do these group and private sessions where we had to do arts and crafts, talk about what's "bothering" us and come up with "coping skills." It's a whole gimmick. They give everyone there meds. It's so sad. If you don't participate in group or refuse to take their medicine they keep you there longer. And if you're really belligerent they give you "booty juice" which is what they called the sedative. I realized that my first day in. So every time I got committed I just played the game. Pretended I was getting better and that meds were helping me (they absolutely weren't.) I got out quicker than most. But the last time I went I swore I'd never come back. It's not helpful at all.

 

[Lara Francis]

In my experience they just call paramedics to manhandle you if you resist, but I was at a youth ward back then.

I got put in a psych ward when I was 17. It was the most humiliating, dehumanizing experience in my life. I've been restrained to my bed three times for daring to speak against the nurses and have breakdowns. Whenever I'd have a sobbing breakdown, I'd be irritable and if I rightfully told the nurses to fuck off they'd forcibly restrain me for being "disrespectful". I've been injected with sedatives against my will before and we were allowed to request sedatives if we felt overly agitated, which wasn't a good way of treatment at all, tbh. I realized how good lorazepam felt. We were treated like lesser and it felt more like prison than a healing environment.

I've always been a rebellious type, so I got the short end of the stick. I kind of set an example for the ward of someone who doesn't take shit but a lot of them thought I was being stupid or crazy when I was wrestling the paramedics sent to restrain me that one time. I was there for almost 3 months because of this, both because I got involuntarily admitted and my mother didn't consider me stable enough to get me out. I was mostly in great distress while I was there, because of my distrust for other people. I've had periods of hiding in my bed scared of people and they'd deem me "unstable" for this and I had to force myself to get out of bed and socialize. Participating in activities and talking to other patients was how they considered you "stable".

I can tell you more about this if you'd ask, because youth wards here are way more interactive than adult wards.

That sounds so scary especially as a younger person.

 

[kohaku]

And if you're really belligerent they give you "booty juice" which is what they called the sedative.

Omg, I'm sorry but this made me laugh. Booty juice is so accurate.
The youth ward was really rowdy so we had entire rhymes about meds and a whole meme about the one male nurse who was super strict and usually did the shots. There was a lot of stuff written over the walls until they renovated the place by the end of my stay, sadly, and one of those things was "i want a shot in the ass from mr. [male nurse]".

 

[intheweeds]

I've been hospitalized three times. First time was when I was 16 and I'm now 32 for reference.

The first hospital was pretty bad. I had a roommate who would start choking me to near unconsciousness and then let go and say he's just joking. He was fucking nuts but for whatever reason I never told the staff.

Second time was when I was 19. This hospital was not bad at all. Once I got off suicide watch I was able to go do activities like basketball, pool, bowling, or go outside and play volleyball. I actually began to befriend some of the other patients there and think at the time it may of actually helped.

And the last time was 24. Nothing all eventful to mention about this. I mostly just stayed in my room, the only time they made me present was for therapy and medication. Some patients even slept through some meals. Just mostly told them what they wanted to hear and got myself out as quickly as possible. It wasn't bad or great, it was kind of a blur, I don't remember much of it.

 

[kohaku]

I've been hospitalized three times. First time was when I was 16 and I'm now 32 for reference.

The first hospital was pretty bad. I had a roommate who would start choking me to near unconsciousness and then let go and say he's just joking. He was fucking nuts but for whatever reason I never told the staff.

Second time was when I was 19. This hospital was not bad at all. Once I got off suicide watch I was able to go do activities like basketball, pool, bowling, or go outside and play volleyball. I actually began to befriend some of the other patients here and think at the time it may or actually helped.

And the last time was 24. Nothing all eventful to mention about this. I mostly just stayed in my room, the only time they made me present was for therapy and medication. Some patients even slept through some meals. Just mostly told them what they wanted to hear and got myself out as quickly as possible. It wasn't bad or great, it was kind of a blur, I don't remember much of it.

Seems like the youth wards are always the worst because they'd have complete control over us. Adults have so much more freedom and they're legally protected from abuse. (Doesn't stop some nurses though.) So are teens and children, but in youth wards it's much easier for nurses to excuse abuse as "taking care of us".

I envy your experience because all the mental hospitals I'm aware of in my country are genuinely strict and awful. And I'm also surprised that no one noticed the guy hurting you, because in the hospital I was in when I was 17, the nurses would keep constant watch over us, we weren't allowed to close our doors and we had rooms of 2 and 4. If they knew they'd probably have sedated the shit out of him and tied him down.

Anyone else had experience with straitjackets/restraints? I have been restrained to my bed three times (belts, we called it, in a literal translation) and was threatened with a straitjacket once.

 

[Addy92]

UK is shit. Only been on a 136 twice and both times released in less than 12 hours after being advised there's not much they can do for me.

Following this I've begged for help. It's not there. Our mental health system needs looking at. Not even been prescribed any medication. Have to self medicate through means otherwise seen as illegal.

Who knows if I'm even taking the right thing.

 

[406metallicblue]

My experience in france was brilliant compared to what others describe, the nurses were genuinely caring and there was always the opportunity to ask for help. This was partly because i was nicely compliant, took my meds and was polite and showed signs of wanting to get 'better', which sometimes i genuinely did and sometimes faked it in order to get out. However, in a case where you refused to take food and water i expect the outcome would be the same as others have said, you'd be sedated and force fed cause that's what they do. There is no way they are going to allow you to starve yourself to death, it goes against everything modern medicine takes as standard.

 

[Addy92]

My experience in france was brilliant compared to what others describe, the nurses were genuinely caring and there was always the opportunity to ask for help. This was partly because i was nicely compliant, took my meds and was polite and showed signs of wanting to get 'better', which sometimes i genuinely did and sometimes faked it in order to get out. However, in a case where you refused to take food and water i expect the outcome would be the same as others have said, you'd be sedated and force fed cause that's what they do. There is no way they are going to allow you to starve yourself to death, it goes against everything modern medicine takes as standard.

I was willing to accept help. Now I can't see the point after my experiences. Feel like I'm on my own.

 

[406metallicblue]

I was willing to accept help. Now I can't see the point after my experiences. Feel like I'm on my own.

I was willing to accept help. Now I can't see the point after my experiences. Feel like I'm on my own.

Part of the point of this forum is that you are not on your own.

 

[Addy92]

Part of the point of this forum is that you are not on your own.

Yeah but I'm not here for that. I'm here for the methods. Well. I know my methods actually idk what I'm here for anymore. Just passing time till I pass.

 

[uiop]

I was hospitalized four times this year. Two was voluntary; two was involuntary (5150). Compared to what others have described, my experience in the US wasn't too bad, albeit boring, but maybe I'm one of the few lucky ones. I got to meet a lot of interesting people though. It opened my eyes to a wide array of fascinating personalities. They were each beautiful in their own way.

 

[Lara Francis]

I

Yeah but I'm not here for that. I'm here for the methods. Well. I know my methods actually idk what I'm here for anymore. Just passing time till I pass.

Its nice to have your company until that time comes

I was hospitalized four times this year. Two was voluntary; two was involuntary (5150). Compared to what others have described, my experience in the US wasn't too bad, albeit boring, but maybe I'm one of the few lucky ones. I got to meet a lot of interesting people though. It opened my eyes to a wide array of fascinating personalities. They were each beautiful in their own way.

4 times this year ! How long were you in for each time ? If u dont mind me asking.

 

[uiop]

I

Its nice to have your company until that time comes

4 times this year ! How long were you in for each time ? If u dont mind me asking.

Not at all, feel free to ask! I like this community, so I want to be as transparent as possible.

The first two times was voluntary. I desperately needed help, but only stayed three days, which is the minimal amount. I knew they couldn't help me so I got out of there fast. The third time, I stayed for two days. All they did was changed my medication and sent me on my way. The most recent hold was around November; I spent my Thanksgiving at the psychiatric hospital. i got held there for two weeks. The doctor changed my medication, and now I'm taking 150mg of Zoloft every morning for depression and anxiety. It dulled my emotions for a while, made me feel invincible even, but now everything is going downhill fast. I break down over the most minute things, and I don't understand why.

Mental illness is expensive; I've wasted over 6k going in and out of psychiatric facilities, but luckily I have insurance through my day job.

Sorry for ranting; I don't have any family/friends to express this to. The few people that I have disclosed this to do not understand. They want me to be well, and I'm grateful. I promised them I'll keep fighting, but I don't know how much longer I can hold out.

 

[Hotsackage]

Well I live in canada. They almost spoil you so it wasn't that bad

 

[Lara Francis]

Your not ranting @uiop ,I can totally relate.
I was on those meds too and yes they do dull your emotions in a variety of situations.
I wish they could numb my heartache
I cant be bothered with them anymore.
I am here whenever u want to talk,its nice knowing and talking to people who understand.

 

[uiop]

Your not ranting @uiop ,I can totally relate.
I was on those meds too and yes they do dull your emotions in a variety of situations.
I wish they could numb my heartache
I cant be bothered with them anymore.
I am here whenever u want to talk,its nice knowing and talking to people who understand.

Thank you very much. It means a lot.

 

[myrtaryniel]

In Spain it's a really non-pleaseant situation, but it was tolerable. I was there when I was 17 for about two weeks (and it was a lot to see for me at the time, honestly). I was heavy on intravenous drugs so I slept all the time I could, but at times where when we weren't allowed to sleep I just tried to read books and shut everything off. I read Someone flew over the cuckoo's nest, among others, and I don't remember a single thing about the damn book. The place had kind of a living/dinning room but it was really small and there wasn't enough space for everyone. There weren't enough chairs in the dinning room, and they also had to bring in a new bed for me and stuff me where they could. I shared room with two other women, one who spent every damn night screaming and the other one, crying and laughing. Thank god they were tied to the bed and I was on a lot of medication cause other wise I'd have been shitting blocks.
The staff really depended on the turn, sometimes you got the shitty nurses and sometimes you got really nice people, one even let me read in my room when they were supposed to be closed because she saw I was just a lil-suicidal-scared-girl, and for an afternoon I got to not be all the time with the psychos screaming dirty things at me with no one stopping them, or see people shit themselves and spread their feces on their face. I appreciated that.

Over all would not repeat, so if I finally ctb I better do it right lol.