I'm trying really hard to get better, mainly bc I have a husband and family, but it's been so long, I've tried so many medications and treatments and therapies and nothing is helping at all. I even checked myself into the hospital and now am in a specialized treatment facility (which is ridiculously expensive) but I still feel completely hopeless and in despair. I've been begging my husband and mom to let me euthanize myself. I feel like if they loved me they would want me to be out of my suffering. I feel like I can't go on and I just can't live in this world. Does anyone have any hope they can offer? I just don't know what to do.
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One can understand the weariness of having tried many solutions and finding them not very helpful. It sounds like you have not had much help with the medical approaches you have tried.
There are many other things with which to experiment that might have an impact on what you are experiencing. Nutrition is an often overlooked area. Many people in Europe take SAMe for depression. This can be effective because some people have a slight deficiency in a chemical process called methylation. A lot of food is grown on factory farms that have depleted their micro nutrient decades ago. A simple multi-vitamin with minerals can sometimes be helpful. Even something as simple as Fava beans can boost dopamine levels.
Exercise is another area that can be experimented with. Chronic Fatigue Syndrome is another poorly understood area that might have bearing. General inflammation might also be a contributing factor.
In addition to external and internal contributors, our mental constructs can become an influence on us. Therapists usually probe for some developmental trauma that resulted in a way of thinking we carry with us into adult life that hinders our functioning. However, often after dealing with a situation for a long time, we form ways of looking at things that can also be a hindrance.
One experiment to try is for you and your husband to give yourselves a nice romantic weekend at a nice hotel and take advantage of the pool or Jacuzzi and have a nice meal at a good restaurant. If you can enjoy the indulgence, it might tell you that you have the capacity to transcend the issues you are dealing with (even if only briefly) and should experiment on how to make that transcendence more frequent.
If you cannot rise above your issues under the most pleasant circumstances, you may have to work on identifying if the internal issues have more of a biological/chemical source or result more from mental/attitudinal sources. There are self harm cycles that one can become trapped in like cutting or anorexia. Similarly, there are other mental cycles that can become established that work like a millstone around the neck. In this case you can experiment with some of the various techniques those who have overcome these problems have used.
Experimentation is a process of successive approximation. Each failure is a step closer to identifying what can help.
There are many other things with which to experiment that might have an impact on what you are experiencing. Nutrition is an often overlooked area. Many people in Europe take SAMe for depression. This can be effective because some people have a slight deficiency in a chemical process called methylation. A lot of food is grown on factory farms that have depleted their micro nutrient decades ago. A simple multi-vitamin with minerals can sometimes be helpful. Even something as simple as Fava beans can boost dopamine levels.
Exercise is another area that can be experimented with. Chronic Fatigue Syndrome is another poorly understood area that might have bearing. General inflammation might also be a contributing factor.
In addition to external and internal contributors, our mental constructs can become an influence on us. Therapists usually probe for some developmental trauma that resulted in a way of thinking we carry with us into adult life that hinders our functioning. However, often after dealing with a situation for a long time, we form ways of looking at things that can also be a hindrance.
One experiment to try is for you and your husband to give yourselves a nice romantic weekend at a nice hotel and take advantage of the pool or Jacuzzi and have a nice meal at a good restaurant. If you can enjoy the indulgence, it might tell you that you have the capacity to transcend the issues you are dealing with (even if only briefly) and should experiment on how to make that transcendence more frequent.
If you cannot rise above your issues under the most pleasant circumstances, you may have to work on identifying if the internal issues have more of a biological/chemical source or result more from mental/attitudinal sources. There are self harm cycles that one can become trapped in like cutting or anorexia. Similarly, there are other mental cycles that can become established that work like a millstone around the neck. In this case you can experiment with some of the various techniques those who have overcome these problems have used.
Experimentation is a process of successive approximation. Each failure is a step closer to identifying what can help.
HI!!! YES, I do have hope for you!!!!!!
Let me start out by saying this, that you have a hubby and family and all of us here on SS. YOU are a person with some much love to give not only your hubby and family but the whole world! Now add in the aspect that your love and talents help those around you NOT only now but in the future as well.
I have been there, 2 attempts, 72 hour holds, psychic wards, yep, been there , done that. I always wondered why I am still here and when I read posts like yours, I know why and that is: we are ALL the same, hand in hand, shoulder to shoulder, and we all help each other out. You bring so much to the table as a integral part of so many different angles in your and all the people around you. That also includes me, as I need folks like YOU to help me know that I am here for a reason.
YES, YOU are needed and wanted by folks and I maybe 65, reference point, BUT I always need support and the knowledge that I am here for a reason.
Sending you lots of hugs, love and a outstanding day filled with music, sunshine, love and the knowledge that YOU are awesome!
Walter
Let me start out by saying this, that you have a hubby and family and all of us here on SS. YOU are a person with some much love to give not only your hubby and family but the whole world! Now add in the aspect that your love and talents help those around you NOT only now but in the future as well.
I have been there, 2 attempts, 72 hour holds, psychic wards, yep, been there , done that. I always wondered why I am still here and when I read posts like yours, I know why and that is: we are ALL the same, hand in hand, shoulder to shoulder, and we all help each other out. You bring so much to the table as a integral part of so many different angles in your and all the people around you. That also includes me, as I need folks like YOU to help me know that I am here for a reason.
YES, YOU are needed and wanted by folks and I maybe 65, reference point, BUT I always need support and the knowledge that I am here for a reason.
Sending you lots of hugs, love and a outstanding day filled with music, sunshine, love and the knowledge that YOU are awesome!
Walter
Tav
Member
- Apr 20, 2018
- 39
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