Honest opinion on me

[goodoldnoname923]

I guess i value alot and care much for how people see me so heyo here is this thread…

i need to be aware that this post has to be a double edged sword for the sake of fairness i cant take the good without the bad so again anything nice to say go ahead any amounts of criticism or outright abuse it's open season

So stand back mod's…well on this thread aleast anyway…if people start going out their way to abuse me outside of here well…open season

So yea honestly thoughts about me nice or horrible or indifferent and neutral again I'm asking for this so if i don't like it my problem,that doesn't mean i can't offer a rebuttal though

I hope this thread isn't a mistake

 

[fleetingnight]

I always thought you seem like a kind and smart person, I like seeing your posts around the forum. And even though we're in different situations, I can relate to a lot of the feelings you describe.

 

[goodoldnoname923]

I always thought you seem like a kind and smart person, I like seeing your posts around the forum. And even though we're in different situations, I can relate to a lot of the feelings you describe.

I mean i try to be kind it's something i value about humanity despite people telling me otherwise ^^'

And i try to be knowledgeable were i can be but even there is areas i lack in and i'm not afraid to admit that

And its nice to hear someone does honestly at times more recently than anything i have this sorta paranoia or insecurity of sorts that I complain too much or something in all honesty but again could be wrong

I'd like to be more in touch with your situation in all honesty haven't managed to get around to catching up to your vent thread but i believe I remembered to give it a cheeky follow recently so i can try to remember to keep up to date at some point ^^

 

[Agon321]

I don't know you enough (actually, I don't know you at all) to write anything sensible about you.
I only see some of your comments sometimes.
It's too small a database in my brain.

But I will try to write something simplified.

You're a bit of a chaotic person.
You are trying to find a friend in your life because you really miss someone who understands you.
You feel lost.
You want someone to appreciate you.
You try hard to establish any contact with another person.
You are terrified of rejection.
You are afraid that someone may misunderstand you, which may have negative consequences for both parties.
You try to be a very nice person, among others for the reasons I mentioned above.
You tend to blame yourself because you have very low self-esteem.
You'd rather blame yourself (even if it's not your fault) than risk someone rejecting you.
You're probably not a toxic person who is hostile to many people...

Overall, I rate you neutral/positive because you don't have any subjective flaws/behaviors that would bother me much.
Of course, taking into account only this small database.
I might still hate you (I'm just kidding)

I feel like I'm writing about astrology because I write in a very general way.
I have to write like this because I don't know you, so I can't write in a very specific way.

I hope I haven't offended you too much? ;).
I just wrote the first thing that came to my mind.
Don't take my words seriously at all.
You shouldn't do this.

If you want, you can rate me too.
You can get revenge ;).

 

[KillingPain267]

I always value your replies, and you seem honest.

 

[goodoldnoname923]

I don't know you enough (actually, I don't know you at all) to write anything sensible about you.
I only see some of your comments sometimes.
It's too small a database in my brain.

But I will try to write something simplified.

You're a bit of a chaotic person.
You are trying to find a friend in your life because you really miss someone who understands you.
You feel lost.
You want someone to appreciate you.
You try hard to establish any contact with another person.
You are terrified of rejection.
You are afraid that someone may misunderstand you, which may have negative consequences for both parties.
You try to be a very nice person, among others for the reasons I mentioned above.
You tend to blame yourself because you have very low self-esteem.
You'd rather blame yourself (even if it's not your fault) than risk someone rejecting you.
You're probably not a toxic person who is hostile to many people...

Overall, I rate you neutral/positive because you don't have any subjective flaws/behaviors that would bother me much.
Of course, taking into account only this small database.
I might still hate you (I'm just kidding)

I feel like I'm writing about astrology because I write in a very general way.
I have to write like this because I don't know you, so I can't write in a very specific way.

I hope I haven't offended you too much? ;).
I just wrote the first thing that came to my mind.
Don't take my words seriously at all.
You shouldn't do this.

If you want, you can rate me too.
You can get revenge ;).

Chaotic
I'm definitely in need if friends always have been
Feeling lost that's accurate
I crave Apperation and validation
I definitely struggle with forming connections
Fear of rejection definitely
Misunderstanding happens all the time with me sadly i'm a hard person to comprehend granted based on your description so far idk
I definitely blame myself alot but at the same time i feel i blame others alot for my problems and short comings too (although I haven't expressed these in my posts it's definitely something i do impulsively)
Low self asteem and fragile ego
I also can be rather hostile but it is never intended with malice usually a really shitty defence mechanism thats hard to correct

And you haven't offended me at all honestly you seem to have a good grasp on reading people and that's something not many people have so be proud of that

I always value your replies, and you seem honest.

I'm not even sure if i've ever responded to you directly but I've definitely seen you around before. And honestly is something i pride myself on despite people doubting everything i do feel think and say ^^'

 

[ijustwishtodie]

My honest opinion about you is that I don't really have an opinion about you as I only saw one thread from you and that's it. I forgot what that thread was about though I remember comparing yourself to FC for venting in it which I thought seemed strange but, nonetheless, I still don't have an opinion on you

Edit: I guess I saw two threads from you (prior to this one of course) with the second thread being the "most used section" but, once again, I still don't have an opinion on you yet

 

[goodoldnoname923]

My honest opinion about you is that I don't really have an opinion about you as I only saw one thread from you and that's it. I forgot what that thread was about though I remember comparing yourself to FC for venting in it which I thought seemed strange but, nonetheless, I still don't have an opinion on you

I wouldn't say I'm exactly like FC but part of my understanding was that people found FC annoying because of their constant post vents that seem to just repeat the same sorta things over and over

Saying about how existence is terrible without much actual subtext i guess my empathy type is relation…without being able to relate or understand someones hardships or exact emotions it's difficult to empathise

From what I've heard from others she does have a story but her posts to me feel just as that abstract poetry I can't fully comprehend id like to empathise with the human behind that name but it's hard to tell if she or even he is real

But yea my point was if people found my vents repetitive and perhaps they are idk but yea

 

[halleyscomet]

I don't know you very well but I have seen a lot of your threads.

You seem to have a lot of difficulty keeping relationships. When I see somebody who posts a lot of those types of threads, where some blame themselves and some blames the people they have relationships with - it makes me question if there is some sort of pattern of behaviour that is not being recognised that could be causing the failure of those relationships.

Obviously I have no idea about these situations, and I am not trying to blame you or call you a bad person or something, but I do find it odd that this seems to keep happening to you, and I'm wondering if there is some sort of problematic behaviour that you're exhibiting to cause these issues. I can't imagine that you are so unlucky that these relationships keep failing, imo you have to be doing something at least partially for these relationships to keep falling apart.

Perhaps your fear of rejection and low self esteem sabotages these relationships? It's pretty common for these types of feelings to cause relationship dysfunction.

I feel as if you pity yourself more then you try to improve your situation, which I suppose a lot of us do on here. It doesn't make you a bad person or anything, but it is a flawed way of thinking.

I think you are a very flawed and sensitive person, but I think you are a valuable member and you do seem to make an effort to be kind to the community.

I hope you don't think I'm trying to be horrible or something, I do wish you all the best.

 

[goodoldnoname923]

I don't know you very well but I have seen a lot of your threads.

You seem to have a lot of difficulty keeping relationships. When I see somebody who posts a lot of those types of threads, where some blame themselves and some blames the people they have relationships with - it makes me question if there is some sort of pattern of behaviour that is not being recognised that could be causing the failure of those relationships.

Obviously I have no idea about these situations, and I am not trying to blame you or call you a bad person or something, but I do find it odd that this seems to keep happening to you, and I'm wondering if there is some sort of problematic behaviour that you're exhibiting to cause these issues. I can't imagine that you are so unlucky that these relationships keep failing, imo you have to be doing something at least partially for these relationships to keep falling apart.

Perhaps your fear of rejection and low self esteem sabotages these relationships? It's pretty common for these types of feelings to cause relationship dysfunction.

I feel as if you pity yourself more then you try to improve your situation, which I suppose a lot of us do on here. It doesn't make you a bad person or anything, but it is a flawed way of thinking.

I think you are a very flawed and sensitive person, but I think you are a valuable member and you do seem to make an effort to be kind to the community.

I hope you don't think I'm trying to be horrible or something, I do wish you all the best.

I definitely do have a lot of difficulty keeping relationships because of my emotional issue's anxietes insecurities outbursts trust issues abandonment issues basically I have a whole load of issues which blended together don't end well

They are definitely patterns but I struggle to identify them…i can identify them even sometimes the cause and solution but it's putting them into actual practice or maintaining them is my ultimate struggle a cycle I genuinely don't believe i can break that will only allow me to continue hurting people and myself over and over (a strong reason of mine to CTB)

I definitely am part to blame but it's also not intentional on my part nor my fault these issues are their but its my problem as sad as that is

And your not wrong at all growing up I would blame others alot in some ways today i even do the same thing even though i can acknowledge my faults and flaws I struggle to fully take accountability…i guess its part of the villfication i get from certain people i really dont think that helps

I wish people would focus more on how i make them feel rather than how terrible i am as a person and misjudging my intentions

Insecurities and paranoia definitely play apart among other issues and i also do get stuck in a cycle of self pity i admit that

But I tried extremely hard to reflect on my situation with blue this time what i did wrong what i need to do differently how I could even improve my own life relationships and myself but she didn't wanna hear somewhat understandably making me sprial worse and worse

My want to be understood is stronger than my desire to change..is that a flaw…probably perhaps its one of many barriers why i cant

Your being harsh halley…but extremely fair. Gentle but firm the victim mentality is something i adopt alot for good reason but it's not one that will change my situation despite those feelings being valid

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I wouldn't say I'm exactly like FC but part of my understanding was that people found FC annoying because of their constant post vents that seem to just repeat the same sorta things over and over

Saying about how existence is terrible without much actual subtext i guess my empathy type is relation…without being able to relate or understand someones hardships or exact emotions it's difficult to empathise

From what I've heard from others she does have a story but her posts to me feel just as that abstract poetry I can't fully comprehend id like to empathise with the human behind that name but it's hard to tell if she or even he is real

But yea my point was if people found my vents repetitive and perhaps they are idk but yea

People don't find her annoying because of her repetitiveness specifically. They find her annoying because her repetitiveness isn't something that people want to see due to how she sometimes seems to attacks this site or the users within this site. There are other users here who also have a lot of repetition in what they say but they don't get hated on specifically because their views aren't such that where they attack the site. If her views were different and more agreeable, people wouldn't hate her for her repetition.

Also, she does have a story but you'd have to dig pretty far back into her search history to find it. She doesn't really share any of her story now but she did back in 2021 when she first joined here. I think her saying her story would probably make more users here have more empathy for her instead of only saying "death is beautiful" all the time.

Her story even explains as to why she can't ctb easier and the answer to that is far more nuance than just "I can't access nembutal". In short, she has a myriad of chronic health conditions and she probably has even more chronic health conditions that she hasn't revealed yet. She is easily sensitive to suffering due to her autism. She lives with family and is unable to ctb because she doesn't have the means to be independent. She cannot access SN because she has no sense of independence at all and, if she tried to order SN, her parents would probably find out about it or she'd get a welfare check from the police. She's low iq, at least academic wise as she failed high school (btw im not insulting her; im just stating what she already stated in the past).

I think that, with the amount of conditions that she has, she would probably be eligible for euthanasia in countries that have a strict criteria for it. There's more to it but, overall, she has a bigger story than just "I have always hated existence; only death is beautiful". There's still a lot of information that I missed out but, yeah, it sucks that she doesn't show any of her story to others nowadays. She completely distanced herself from everybody else

 

[goodoldnoname923]

People don't find her annoying because of her repetitiveness specifically. They find her annoying because her repetitiveness isn't something that people want to see due to how she sometimes seems to attacks this site or the users within this site. There are other users here who also have a lot of repetition in what they say but they don't get hated on specifically because their views aren't such that where they attack the site. If her views were different and more agreeable, people wouldn't hate her for her repetition.

Also, she does have a story but you'd have to dig pretty far back into her search history to find it. She doesn't really share any of her story now but she did back in 2021 when she first joined here. I think her saying her story would probably make more users here have more empathy for her instead of only saying "death is beautiful" all the time.

Her story even explains as to why she can't ctb easier and the answer to that is far more nuance than just "I can't access nembutal". In short, she has a myriad of chronic health conditions and she probably has even more chronic health conditions that she hasn't revealed yet. She is easily sensitive to suffering due to her autism. She lives with family and is unable to ctb because she doesn't have the means to be independent. She cannot access SN because she has no sense of independence at all and, if she tried to order SN, her parents would probably find out about it or she'd get a welfare check from the police. She's low iq, at least academic wise as she failed high school (btw im not insulting her; im just stating what she already stated in the past).

I think that, with the amount of conditions that she has, she would probably be eligible for euthanasia in countries that have a strict criteria for it. There's more to it but, overall, she has a bigger story than just "I have always hated existence; only death is beautiful". There's still a lot of information that I missed out but, yeah, it sucks that she doesn't show any of her story to others nowadays. She completely distanced herself from everybody else

I feel like thats more tragic than anything…she's basically resolved to "i want to die i want to die" and has become completely disconnected from everyone and reality she doesn't care what people think of her or how people view her…heck she probably feels vilfied by the world so i can understand her pain really

 

[SuicidalOrganism]

good

 

[DefinitelyReady]

People don't find her annoying because of her repetitiveness specifically. They find her annoying because her repetitiveness isn't something that people want to see due to how she sometimes seems to attacks this site or the users within this site. There are other users here who also have a lot of repetition in what they say but they don't get hated on specifically because their views aren't such that where they attack the site. If her views were different and more agreeable, people wouldn't hate her for her repetition.

Also, she does have a story but you'd have to dig pretty far back into her search history to find it. She doesn't really share any of her story now but she did back in 2021 when she first joined here. I think her saying her story would probably make more users here have more empathy for her instead of only saying "death is beautiful" all the time.

Her story even explains as to why she can't ctb easier and the answer to that is far more nuance than just "I can't access nembutal". In short, she has a myriad of chronic health conditions and she probably has even more chronic health conditions that she hasn't revealed yet. She is easily sensitive to suffering due to her autism. She lives with family and is unable to ctb because she doesn't have the means to be independent. She cannot access SN because she has no sense of independence at all and, if she tried to order SN, her parents would probably find out about it or she'd get a welfare check from the police. She's low iq, at least academic wise as she failed high school (btw im not insulting her; im just stating what she already stated in the past).

I think that, with the amount of conditions that she has, she would probably be eligible for euthanasia in countries that have a strict criteria for it. There's more to it but, overall, she has a bigger story than just "I have always hated existence; only death is beautiful". There's still a lot of information that I missed out but, yeah, it sucks that she doesn't show any of her story to others nowadays. She completely distanced herself from everybody else

I think redundancy is any form is just unpleasant :/

 

[goodoldnoname923]

I think redundancy is any form is just unpleasant :/

i hope that doesn't apply to me

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I don't think I've interacted with you much but I can definitely relate to some of the threads you've made that I have read so we're cool as far as I'm concerned.

 

[goodoldnoname923]

I don't think I've interacted with you much but I can definitely relate to some of the threads you've made that I have read so we're cool as far as I'm concerned.

yea i've seen you about a few times myself,but like you said i don't believe we've ever interacted so yea your good in my books as well

 

[DefinitelyReady]

i hope that doesn't apply to me

I mean even my own mother annoys me because she will tell me the same thing in five different ways, and have a 20min convo about it, that could have been condensed into a 90sec summarizatoon ya know?
You seem to not be comfortable being alone, and I get that, but it's quality not quantity ya know. I think I've also just lost patience and I'm too exhausted too give what little energy I do have to something that isn't impactful. I save articles all the time that I'd like to read in the future (If I ever have one or get around to them.) but they aren't helping me at this moment so they can wait... One reason why I have no room on my phone :/

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I feel like thats more tragic than anything…she's basically resolved to "i want to die i want to die" and has become completely disconnected from everyone and reality she doesn't care what people think of her or how people view her…heck she probably feels vilfied by the world so i can understand her pain really

Her situation and her endless venting on here truly is tragic. I don't think that anybody or anything can convince her or change her mind on anything anymore. She'll be in this endless loop of venting about the same thing until either this site changes massively in terms of the moderation, this site gets taken by pro lifers, she gets banned or, last but not least, until she dies. She's too far gone unfortunately. I understand her pain too and she's my favourite user but even I have to admit that she isn't really fully in the right with her behaviour. Her pain is immense and valid and I understand her a lot because my life is basically similar to hers minus the chronic issues (I never really enjoyed life to begin with similar to her) but, at the end of the day, she is in a public forum and there are rules here. As @LaVieEnRose stated once here, this place has its own internet decorum to abide to but even I'll admit that FC doesn't exactly abide to that at all

 

[goodoldnoname923]

Her situation and her endless venting on here truly is tragic. I don't think that anybody or anything can convince her or change her mind on anything anymore. She'll be in this endless loop of venting about the same thing until either this site changes massively in terms of the moderation, this site gets taken by pro lifers, she gets banned or, last but not least, until she dies. She's too far gone unfortunately. I understand her pain too and she's my favourite user but even I have to admit that she isn't really fully in the right with her behaviour. Her pain is immense and valid and I understand her a lot because my life is basically similar to hers minus the chronic issues (I never really enjoyed life to begin with similar to her) but, at the end of the day, she is in a public forum and there are rules here. As @LaVieEnRose stated once here, this place has its own internet decorum to abide to but even I'll admit that FC doesn't exactly abide to that at all

Tbf and i dont want this thread to devolve into the "opinions on FC thread" but my own decent interaction with FC was ages ago around when i intially joined here when i made a post about my friend kimchi giving me premission to die at 18

Said something along the lines of she sounds like a really nice friend which actually felt sweet as it wasn't her usual gentic "i wish you well,or whoa is me i want to die" so that was a decent interaction that has stuck In memory for me other than that ye

 

[ijustwishtodie]

Tbf and i dont want this thread to devolve into the "opinions on FC thread" but my own decent interaction with FC was ages ago around when i intially joined here when i made a post about my friend kimchi giving me premission to die at 18

Said something along the lines of she sounds like a really nice friend which actually felt sweet as it wasn't her usual gentic "i wish you well,or whoa is me i want to die" so that was a decent interaction that has stuck In memory for me other than that ye

I was about to say that I'm surprised she would say such a thing but, once I re-read the part about your friend giving you permission to die, I no longer became surprised. She probably only said what she said because your friend gave you permission to die, not because of anything else your friend did. Though, I will admit, it does sound nice to have a friend who accepts your desire to die... well unless you want to recover of course because, in that case, giving you permission would probably be unpleasant

 

[DefinitelyReady]

Her situation and her endless venting on here truly is tragic. I don't think that anybody or anything can convince her or change her mind on anything anymore. She'll be in this endless loop of venting about the same thing until either this site changes massively in terms of the moderation, this site gets taken by pro lifers, she gets banned or, last but not least, until she dies. She's too far gone unfortunately. I understand her pain too and she's my favourite user but even I have to admit that she isn't really fully in the right with her behaviour. Her pain is immense and valid and I understand her a lot because my life is basically similar to hers minus the chronic issues (I never really enjoyed life to begin with similar to her) but, at the end of the day, she is in a public forum and there are rules here. As @LaVieEnRose stated once here, this place has its own internet decorum to abide to but even I'll admit that FC doesn't exactly abide to that at all

Well if she got some kind of reprimand from the moderation she might be more inclined to think about her choice of posts, but clearly that isn't going to happen, which is really just more detrimental to her unfortunately :/

 

[ijustwishtodie]

Well if she got some kind of reprimand from the moderation she might be more inclined to think about her choice of posts, but clearly that isn't going to happen, which is really just more detrimental to her unfortunately :/

She got a few warnings from the mods in the past but that's all I've heard of regarding moderators taking action against her

 

[jarik]

I think you're a good person, keep it up