S

Susan Caswell

Specialist
Feb 25, 2019
316
I cant go on any longer and don't know how to go help anyone cant take this any longer tinnitus so deafening its driving me a tortured demented wreck pinning my hopes on Pagasos in Switzerland but don't know if I can hang on I want to go now desperate for quiet peace calm never thought it would come to this I was so well happy 2 years 6 months deafening jet plane roaring hammering drilling hissing taken terrible toll so ill from the anxiety that bad alone lost 2 stone most of my hair body bouncing and shaking I had a life a happy wonderful life this came from nowhere how is this possible its torture day after day humans have to have quiet calm be happy I cant live with this why o don't even know why or cause came from nowhere help me someone please
 
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Reactions: TAW122, cosmicpixiedust, Quarky00 and 1 other person
Zoltiel

Zoltiel

We're asleep in life's waiting room
Jan 7, 2020
162
I'm sorry that you're suffering. It looks like you've been here a while, surely you must know about the various methods talked about on this forum?
 
Thereisnothing

Thereisnothing

Enlightened
Jan 4, 2020
1,604
Tinnitus can be hell, I suffer with it in varying degrees but not as bad as some people do. Sounds like yours is really getting to you.
I have multiple illnesses and one has made me lose a lot of my hair, plus with severe gastric problems I have lost alot of weight.
Its hard when we reach the stage where we feel so, so desperate that another second to have to get through is just too much, yet somehow we seem to get passed it and then minute, ten minutes......
Sadly I dont know how to help my tinnitus, its not an easy thing to treat, so not really got many ideas to share with you really but just wanted to let you know I can understand how much be for you. Are there other problems you have which are making you suicidal? You say you just want to get to Switzerland, have you approached them and asked for assessment etc or is it something you just feel you would like to do.
Life or existence as I often call it can be hell, to the point of really suffering greatly, its so hard to fight and find coping mechanisms, but its surprising what we can find to alleviate it even if just a tiny bit. I think you've made right step by writing your post, just getting things off your chest can be therapeutic and a help in itself. It doesn't change the situation, but better than bottling it up and going round and round in head.
 
S

Susan Caswell

Specialist
Feb 25, 2019
316
I'm sorry that you're suffering. It looks like you've been here a while, surely you must know about the various methods talked about on this forum?
Can only think jump or stop eating and drinking terrified of living with this terrified of dying never thought id ever have to contemplate such a thing just cant believe this has happened or why I was healthy fit happy all good really good went to bed fine woke up deafening noise knew I couldn't live with it if it didn't stop or let up not only has it not let up but so much worse than when it started then hyperacusis came and it changed everything to unliveable with followed by crippling anxiety I hated noise hate it but this in your own ears day after day is truly horrific I could have stood lived with any other condition but this that you just cant stop cant get away from cant sleep wish I could get someone to take me out this is tragic all it had to do was not come my life would just have been perfect wonderful years of happy ahead all my plans cant get over it millions live with tinnitus but not like this usually mild moderate certainly copable this isn't or I would can stand a lot but this no I cant don't know how I am still here or not had heart attack or stroke with the anxiety like this why me why this now been good all my life recovered from cancer taken out with tinnitus but theres tinnitus and TINNITUS this is suffering like I never knew possible tried and tried to find cause get it treated just got louder and louder so loud now my ears pound vibrate echo pain its hideous to want to die for the peace not like me I valued life but this has pushed me to breaking point and I can take a lot this could rip my head off I was terrified of dying now its all I hope go to sleep never wake up please someone out there help me there must be an answer cant survive this at breaking point how long will it take if I stop eating and drinking think it will be a terrible death but cant risk jumping and not dying that would just be my luck x
 
Defenestrator

Defenestrator

Experienced
Jan 17, 2020
257
I'm not sure of your history, I'm assuming you've been to a doctor? It may sound extreme but, if there is no cure for this kind of tinnitus, why can't they give people the option of deafness? Would that help? Seems far less extreme than euthanasia.
 
S

Susan Caswell

Specialist
Feb 25, 2019
316
Tinnitus can be hell, I suffer with it in varying degrees but not as bad as some people do. Sounds like yours is really getting to you.
I have multiple illnesses and one has made me lose a lot of my hair, plus with severe gastric problems I have lost alot of weight.
Its hard when we reach the stage where we feel so, so desperate that another second to have to get through is just too much, yet somehow we seem to get passed it and then minute, ten minutes......
Sadly I dont know how to help my tinnitus, its not an easy thing to treat, so not really got many ideas to share with you really but just wanted to let you know I can understand how much be for you. Are there other problems you have which are making you suicidal? You say you just want to get to Switzerland, have you approached them and asked for assessment etc or is it something you just feel you would like to do.
Life or existence as I often call it can be hell, to the point of really suffering greatly, its so hard to fight and find coping mechanisms, but its surprising what we can find to alleviate it even if just a tiny bit. I think you've made right step by writing your post, just getting things off your chest can be therapeutic and a help in itself. It doesn't change the situation, but better than bottling it up and going round and round in head.
No nothing else purely the tinnitus I was fine before this came from nowhere really was healthy happy and had a wonderful life all was good more than good jujst the difference in it not coming id be continuing life to the full had such plans hopes and dreams cant believe its happened and no clue why came from nowhere no sign no creeping up just went from nothing to horrific can remember day I woke up with it will never forget it 25 July 2017 I can remember saying to my partner no dear god please please not tinnitus my partner had it 3 friends do all don't bother live life to the full I have had high pitch hissing for years never bothered me but seriously roaring like jet on runway with hammering I can feel and pneumatic drill hyperacusis so bad all sound is also deafening I cant even talk my own voice echoes back at me vibrates how can a human being live with this we need quiet peace and calm I want my life back just getting so ill. Yes applied to Switzerland waiting to here don't know if I am too ill to get there though x
x
I'm not sure of your history, I'm assuming you've been to a doctor? It may sound extreme but, if there is no cure for this kind of tinnitus, why can't they give people the option of deafness? Would that help? Seems far less extreme than euthanasia.
Ive asked to be made deaf they said id still hear the damn tinnitus X
 
Defenestrator

Defenestrator

Experienced
Jan 17, 2020
257
Ah yeah, I've just looked it up - it seems to be comorbid with hearing loss. That's shitty and I'm really sorry you're going through it. It sounds truly awful.
Does nothing help at all? Like playing white noise through in-ear buds?
 
J

JSauter

Experienced
Oct 14, 2019
207
I've had tinnitus for 11 years now. I couldn't stand it at first. Now I don't even notice it's there. Sorry you're struggling with it
 
J

jgm63

Visionary
Oct 28, 2019
2,467
If you've decided that you wish to CTB, then what methods have you looked into ?
Many people on this site seem to use "SN".

:heart:
 
D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
I'm so sorry Susan you sound so desperate it must be awful. I suffer from tinnitus and hearing loss, but it's not that bad and I've gotten used to it. Yours sounds awful. And yeah I've never found a treatment though having my ears syringes helped a little but you are well beyond that.
I can only offer my heartfelt sympathy. You shouldn't have to suffer this.
 
foreveryoung

foreveryoung

Member
Jan 2, 2020
63
I thought I had tinnitus (obviously not as bad as you described it), but went outside and found out? or can almost be sure it was a nearby construction work or a generator going off 24/7. I know the city does not care about noise pollution or how it will hurt people, they just want to make a profit. Sometimes I think it might be tinnitus, but i can't really tell, but it still drives me mad. I rather it be tinnitus because if it was from outside thats a disturbing thought in itself.

I thought they had hearing aids or things that help make it better? hopefully you can get them. I can't get much help firstly because i can't afford to see a doctor, and secondly i still can't tell if its construction work or just in my head. Life is just like this we keep losing one thing at a time until we pass away completely.
 
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