Venting help I forgot how to be human

[okkkk]

Whatever muscle allows you to enter a room and talk to people and convince them that you arent completley crumbling inside has atrophied to complete uselessness. I dont know how I used to do it but I sure do notice it now that its gone. I can say without hyperbole that I would cut off a limb to be able to enter a room of strangers, or even people that I already know and be comepletley calm and be able to be relaxed and speak my mind. No more profuse buckets of sweat. No more shaking. No more constant racing thoughts.

Im so alone. IM ALONE and i cant take it. Id do ANYTHING to quell this horrid anxiety. I hate knowing something is so very wrong with me but have nothing in the way of actually fixing it. I just want to be in the ground. I just want to sleep. IM so tired of the fear and the shame. Id do anything to be able to talk to someone and enjoy them being around me. and vice versa

 

[Soul]

We're here - you can talk with us.
I'd call us baby steps but we aren't, not at all.

And there's a kitten taste-testing your pizza. What's not to enjoy?!

(((Hugs)))

 

[21Neberg]

Whatever muscle allows you to enter a room and talk to people and convince them that you arent completley crumbling inside has atrophied to complete uselessness. I dont know how I used to do it but I sure do notice it now that its gone. I can say without hyperbole that I would cut off a limb to be able to enter a room of strangers, or even people that I already know and be comepletley calm and be able to be relaxed and speak my mind. No more profuse buckets of sweat. No more shaking. No more constant racing thoughts.

Im so alone. IM ALONE and i cant take it. Id do ANYTHING to quell this horrid anxiety. I hate knowing something is so very wrong with me but have nothing in the way of actually fixing it. I just want to be in the ground. I just want to sleep. IM so tired of the fear and the shame. Id do anything to be able to talk to someone and enjoy them being around me. and vice versa

I can relate to the social anxiety, a lot. It's absolutely horrible. What helps me usually is to blast music into my head so that I can't even hear myself think. Could that work for you too?