What if I'm left there, sitting forever with all my regrets and what ifs.
Maybe im reading too much into this, but if your talking about potentially having what ifs and regrets then maybe it's just not your time to go yet?
Personally, i believe there is nothing after death (like literally nothing, you won't even realise because there's nothing, nothing), no matter what you believe, or what actually happens after death, why do you want to leave this life wondering if it's the right time to go?
I'm happy to die young because there's nothing in particular i want to do/achieve and there's no way I can see myself living any kind of a fulfilling life (im just waiting for my dog to pass away). If you think there's still a chance for you to do stuff you wanna do or live a somewhat fulfilling life then why not go on for a little bit longer?
Once again, maybe im reading into this too much but it sounds like you're having second thoughts. Don't forget you can ctb at anytime, there's no rush.