S
spiraloutdeath
Member
- Jun 10, 2024
- 22
i have had some serious side effects from medications last 2 years. My health is dealing badly and my body is difficult to move around. Docs have been useless. I can't bare to even see myself in the mirror.
Part of me still wants to live but i know i cannot live in this world like this. That is what is driving the desire.
So I need to go but part of me wants to stay alive but knows it cannot in this shell its like a catch 22 and its been like Groundhog Day every day reviewing these forums. I think i am waiting for myself to snap and just do it.
I want a fool proof way…. I feel like suspension and partial can still have the potential to be found. Drowning seems super painful but more finite… maybe the ocean.. but thats also scary as hell..
I dont want to go out with Meds for some reason….maybe i am scared of having duff meds and getting more damaged…
Any one feel similar catch 22
Part of me still wants to live but i know i cannot live in this world like this. That is what is driving the desire.
So I need to go but part of me wants to stay alive but knows it cannot in this shell its like a catch 22 and its been like Groundhog Day every day reviewing these forums. I think i am waiting for myself to snap and just do it.
I want a fool proof way…. I feel like suspension and partial can still have the potential to be found. Drowning seems super painful but more finite… maybe the ocean.. but thats also scary as hell..
I dont want to go out with Meds for some reason….maybe i am scared of having duff meds and getting more damaged…
Any one feel similar catch 22