Apostle
Student
- Apr 17, 2019
- 129
In your opinion, is it better or worse to intentionally give yourself some possible way to back out, when attempting a ctb?
I'm a huge coward with no resistance to pain. I'm mainly looking at full suspension for a method. It's infamous as a scary and excruciating way to go, especially if you do it wrong (which I probably would), but it seems like the best way to trap myself, forcing myself to take the pain and potentially making it very difficult or impossible to escape if there's nothing to easily grab onto or cut. That's what's attractive about it to me. I just don't believe I have the balls to fully go through with killing myself if I know there's an easy escape the whole time. I think it's necessary to trap myself, for that reason, but maybe I need to think about it more, and hear what people have to say about it. Especially since I haven't even taken a "test drive" or even figured out my hanging setup yet.
I know some people say it's important to have an exit because when you start dying, that can potentially be the moment when you start to regret or have second thoughts about your suicide and suddenly decide you want to live. And for some people that may be true, but personally I feel like my mind would only be less sober and reasonable. Like, I might feel that way when I start dying, but, I think that'd just be survival instinct and fear speaking, not to mention my blood and oxygen deprived brain. Not my actual thoughts. I think if I come to the point of sticking my neck in a noose, with real intent to die at that moment, I've already made my decision and my feelings while I'm hanging, seconds later, should probably just be ignored.
But there could be a side to this I'm not seeing and I'm curious to hear what you guys think. Thanks.
I'm a huge coward with no resistance to pain. I'm mainly looking at full suspension for a method. It's infamous as a scary and excruciating way to go, especially if you do it wrong (which I probably would), but it seems like the best way to trap myself, forcing myself to take the pain and potentially making it very difficult or impossible to escape if there's nothing to easily grab onto or cut. That's what's attractive about it to me. I just don't believe I have the balls to fully go through with killing myself if I know there's an easy escape the whole time. I think it's necessary to trap myself, for that reason, but maybe I need to think about it more, and hear what people have to say about it. Especially since I haven't even taken a "test drive" or even figured out my hanging setup yet.
I know some people say it's important to have an exit because when you start dying, that can potentially be the moment when you start to regret or have second thoughts about your suicide and suddenly decide you want to live. And for some people that may be true, but personally I feel like my mind would only be less sober and reasonable. Like, I might feel that way when I start dying, but, I think that'd just be survival instinct and fear speaking, not to mention my blood and oxygen deprived brain. Not my actual thoughts. I think if I come to the point of sticking my neck in a noose, with real intent to die at that moment, I've already made my decision and my feelings while I'm hanging, seconds later, should probably just be ignored.
But there could be a side to this I'm not seeing and I'm curious to hear what you guys think. Thanks.