Have you ever missed school/work because of your mood?

[15dec]

I skipped college all of last week because I just feel to depressed and paranoid to go out. I used to do it a fair bit in high school too but I thought I was done with that after starting college. I feel like a failure to be honest, I started this year with high expectations for myself and now I can't even bring myself to go in and haven't done any work. Even if I wasn't feeling great some days I still went in to see all my friends but I can't even bring myself to send a text now. Sad thing is, I plan on skipping as much of next week as possible too even though I know it's screwing up my course. Am I the only one like this?

 

[Othermind]

I skipped college all of last week because I just feel to depressed and paranoid to go out. I used to do it a fair bit in high school too but I thought I was done with that after starting college. I feel like a failure to be honest, I started this year with high expectations for myself and now I can't even bring myself to go in and haven't done any work. Even if I wasn't feeling great some days I still went in to see all my friends but I can't even bring myself to send a text now. Sad thing is, I plan on skipping as much of next week as possible too even though I know it's screwing up my course. Am I the only one like this?

Jesus, you set a really low bar for feeling like a failure.
During my second year of high school I just stopped going to school a few weeks after christmas and spent the rest of the school year at home. No apologies. I just told my parents that I wasn't going anymore and if they didn't like it they could throw me out of the house.
Then I did it again when I started uni and I realized I totally wasn't ready for it. Only that time I did promise I'd try to get a job, which I never did apart from a few half assed attempts at an employment agency. But it's the thought that counts, right?
I mean, skipping a few days of school, even a whole year, because of your mood is nothing, I know people that have done that and I totally understand them.

 

[15dec]

Jesus, you set a really low bar for feeling like a failure.
During my second year of high school I just stopped going to school a few weeks after christmas and spent the rest of the school year at home. No apologies. I just told my parents that I wasn't going anymore and if they didn't like it they could throw me out of the house.
Then I did it again when I started uni and I realized I totally wasn't ready for it. Only that time I did promise I'd try to get a job, which I never did apart from a few half assed attempts at an employment agency. But it's the thought that counts, right?
I mean, skipping a few days of school, even a whole year, because of your mood is nothing, I know people that have done that and I totally understand them.

I wish I could just take a year off, sadly my mum has already had a few phone calls demanding why I'm not coming in despite her telling them I've been ill and if I push it much more they'll threaten fines again and it's just more stress to deal with.

 

[Othermind]

I wish I could just take a year off, sadly my mum has already had a few phone calls demanding why I'm not coming in despite her telling them I've been ill and if I push it much more they'll threaten fines again and it's just more stress to deal with.

What? Fines? For not going to college? Does it have anything to do with a scholarship or something or is it just a crazy private school that you go to?
I'm sorry you're in this situation, btw, it just sounds surreal to me. I mean you're supposed to be an independent adult when you go to college, why do they treat you like a kindergartener?

 

[JustAboutDone]

I wish I could just take a year off, sadly my mum has already had a few phone calls demanding why I'm not coming in despite her telling them I've been ill and if I push it much more they'll threaten fines again and it's just more stress to deal with.

Sweetheart, I'm sorry you're feeling so rubbish right now :-(
Can you identify if there is a specific element that is putting you off going in, or is it the lethargy of the depression that is making it impossible to do anything atm?
Is there any way to get a Drs note to be able to negotiate half days? It's easy to forgot that depression is a real illness with mental and physical symptoms and lethargy and exhaustion are part of it - and it is made fifty times harder by not having a giant orange plaster cast on your arm that gives people a visual to see.

If you can get to negotiate 3 days a week or half days that might be a help, I was able to do that for work a few years back where I arranged I would work from home 2 days and office 3 days and found I could cope better.

Xxxxx

 

[15dec]

What? Fines? For not going to college? Does it have anything to do with a scholarship or something or is it just a crazy private school that you go to?
I'm sorry you're in this situation, btw, it just sounds surreal to me. I mean you're supposed to be an independent adult when you go to college, why do they treat you like a kindergartener?

I'm in England so college is different to in the US, it's basically the last two years of high school. I don't know what it's like in America or anywhere else but when my attendance has started falling below 95% we start getting phone calls and letters that usually threaten fines if it doesn't increase.

 

[JustAboutDone]

I'm in England so college is different to in the US, it's basically the last two years of high school. I don't know what it's like in America or anywhere else but when my attendance has started falling below 95% we start getting phone calls and letters that usually threaten fines if it doesn't increase.

They are mean like that here, aren't they :-(
Try and see your gp this week and get a sick note and get them off your case do you at least have some breathing space. This is the trouble with having "targets" - it stops people using discretion and understanding individuals

 

[15dec]

Sweetheart, I'm sorry you're feeling so rubbish right now :-(
Can you identify if there is a specific element that is putting you off going in, or is it the lethargy of the depression that is making it impossible to do anything atm?
Is there any way to get a Drs note to be able to negotiate half days? It's easy to forgot that depression is a real illness with mental and physical symptoms and lethargy and exhaustion are part of it - and it is made fifty times harder by not having a giant orange plaster cast on your arm that gives people a visual to see.

If you can get to negotiate 3 days a week or half days that might be a help, I was able to do that for work a few years back where I arranged I would work from home 2 days and office 3 days and found I could cope better.

Xxxxx

I think it's mostly the lethargy and partly another situation that's happened recently. I'm already doing three days a week since I'm doing a btec course and one day of work experience, I could try and get a doctors letter but usually my GP charges for things like that. I think it's about £20 or so for one unless prices changed since last time. I could try and talk to my teacher about if there's any possibility of doing work from home but I'm not sure if my college allows things like that, and I'm a little skeptical of if she'd tell my parents I'm feeling depressed again or involve anyone else in it.

 

[JustAboutDone]

I think it's mostly the lethargy and partly another situation that's happened recently. I'm already doing three days a week since I'm doing a btec course and one day of work experience, I could try and get a doctors letter but usually my GP charges for things like that. I think it's about £20 or so for one unless prices changed since last time. I could try and talk to my teacher about if there's any possibility of doing work from home but I'm not sure if my college allows things like that, and I'm a little skeptical of if she'd tell my parents I'm feeling depressed again or involve anyone else in it.

Good idea - try and talk to your teacher and ask her to keep it private from your parents. It's definitely worth asking if you can do some study from home. Also, it might be worth considering whether you are 100% physically well, too. I remember having glandular fever in 6th form and it was exhausting. I didn't know until they did blood tests for something else as you can have a mild / moderate case and not have severe symptoms except exhaustion.

 

[15dec]

They are mean like that here, aren't they :-(
Try and see your gp this week and get a sick note and get them off your case do you at least have some breathing space. This is the trouble with having "targets" - it stops people using discretion and understanding individuals

Gah, speaking of targets my college put me on one for 'not attending tutorials' (basically monthly class meetings to talk about stuff like internet safety, drugs, that kind of thing). I only missed a couple and one was their fault for making a mistake in my timetable and giving me a different teacher/date for it and the other was when I was at the doctors. Sigh, so frustrating!

 

[Othermind]

I'm in England so college is different to in the US, it's basically the last two years of high school. I don't know what it's like in America or anywhere else but when my attendance has started falling below 95% we start getting phone calls and letters that usually threaten fines if it doesn't increase.

Ok, I didn't know about that.
And I'm not from the U.S but here attendance is not mandatory for most courses, and even then you can get permits from your doctor/employer if you really can't get to the few that are.
Maybe you could look into that, too? I honestly don't see any other option.
Best of luck.

 

[15dec]

Good idea - try and talk to your teacher and ask her to keep it private from your parents. It's definitely worth asking if you can do some study from home. Also, it might be worth considering whether you are 100% physically well, too. I remember having glandular fever in 6th form and it was exhausting. I didn't know until they did blood tests for something else as you can have a mild / moderate case and not have severe symptoms except exhaustion.

Yeah, my other problem is that I've been feeling/being sick a lot more than usual since Christmas, it's part of the reason I haven't gone in recently either. I mentioned it to a doctor but she just said to try gaviscon, I might try and get an appointment with my usual doctor if it's not too busy x

 

[15dec]

Ok, I didn't know about that.
And I'm not from the U.S but here attendance is not mandatory for most courses, and even then you can get permits from your doctor/employer if you really can't get to the few that are.
Maybe you could look into that, too? I honestly don't see any other option.
Best of luck.

I'll see what my options are, thank you for your advice!

 

[Othermind]

I'll see what my options are, thank you for your advice!

I'd say try to embellish it as much as you can without alarming them and having them send you to a psych ward.

try gaviscon

You mean the otc stuff you take when you get heartburn? Wow...

 

[Memento Mori]

I finished my last school year with being around maybe two-thirds of the whole time xD
Never cared, couldn't say that I don't regret it but my grades were still acceptable enough to do something I'd like to do.

 

[21Neberg]

I've skipped plenty of classes to get home early and cut myself. I don't do that anymore though, I just cut myself in the bathroom stalls now.

 

[Othermind]

I've skipped plenty of classes to get home early and cut myself. I don't do that anymore though, I just cut myself in the bathroom stalls now.

And how do you deal with being found or bleeding through your clothes? Isn't it a bit too risky to cut yourself in a public place?

 

[Broken]

Probably had more time off work in the last 7months than Ive had in all the 13 years I've been working. I think I'm going to have to leave my job to get better.

 

[TAW122]

Yeah when I was younger and in college, I did end up missing a few classes (luckily the professor of that course didn't take attendance nor is participation factored into the course grade) either by sleeping in (morning classes) or just too upset to leave my room to go to class.

 

[Sanguinius]

No. Never. Not one day.
(Buuuut I got the permission for not have to go to school/work because of my mood :P
Does this count too?)

 

[Koal]

For most of high school I maintained very good attendance, I think one year I even got an award for perfect or highest attendance. But towards the end of my last year I just got so sick of it and would show up half way through the day or not at all. I'd show up but just sit in the art room not go to classes. Then I just dropped out because I felt so angry at myself for disappointing my teachers.

 

[Final Escape]

I skipped college all of last week because I just feel to depressed and paranoid to go out. I used to do it a fair bit in high school too but I thought I was done with that after starting college. I feel like a failure to be honest, I started this year with high expectations for myself and now I can't even bring myself to go in and haven't done any work. Even if I wasn't feeling great some days I still went in to see all my friends but I can't even bring myself to send a text now. Sad thing is, I plan on skipping as much of next week as possible too even though I know it's screwing up my course. Am I the only one like this?

Yes I would miss work due to severe PMDD almost every month and I would get wrote up. I was on a ton of psych meds, but it didn't fix the severe hormone fluctuations around my time of the month. This is why I'm not sure women are as cut out for the labor force unless the employer takes this into consideration and accommodates it. Sadly they don't, and expect u to function and when u cannot you're goin to end up unemployed. This is one reason I felt I had no choice but to work in black market. Because u have more control over your hours and when u work etc. no write ups if u cannot work that day.

 

[therhydler]

I'm sorry you're dealing with this. I missed out a few months of school because of my "depression" (I hate that word). This year I completely stopped going to uni a few weeks after classes had started. My psychiatrist wrote me a note explaining I'm not fit to attend classes. A few weeks after that was my first attempt which landed me in hospital for 2 months and now I'm home, doing absolutely nothing all day...

 

[waived]

I missed school and a lot of your stories here and around the forum bring back hellish memories. I get the mental version of that feeling I get in my legs when watching videos of people falling especially around pools. There has been a LONG era of having a place to live become destabilized while working full time usually involving roommates or a horrific increase in rent, which then causes work to fall through. There's also work just falling apart but falling apart at work is probably my favorite because at least it's a calculated and cathartic fury.

 

[21Neberg]

And how do you deal with being found or bleeding through your clothes? Isn't it a bit too risky to cut yourself in a public place?

It certainly is risky, but the urges are too strong sometimes. I just need to cope with feelings sometimes.

 

[cherub]

LOL, yeah. Come to think of it, I've been considering not showing up to class since I hope to catch the bus this month(hopefully if everything goes as planned and I can get all the supplies I need)

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

Yes, I dropped out of university due to anxiety issues. I was okay the first couple of years, but as time went on I became more and more fearful and antisocial. I felt like people were staring at me when I walked into class, and I am super sensitive to scrutiny. I began locking myself away in my dorm room and avoiding everything and everybody. I would get into awkward interactions with professors whereby I kept having to make up bullshit excuses explaining my many absences. My grades suffered and I started bailing on final exams. That was the final straw, understandably.

 

[Argon]

I've flunked entire semesters because I couldn't bring myself to leave the house and go to classes, and called out of work "with food poisoning/vomiting" at least a dozen times on the days I can't bring myself to fake a smile

 

[Sixfeetunder]

Back in 2016 I did a few times. It can be a struggle to have perfect attendance sometimes.

 

[Kyrok]

I rarely miss work due simply to depression, but often get nothing done because of it. When I'm not depressed, I acheive extraordinary things, so my bosses just give me space when I'm depressed.