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noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
5,415
The book I read say some people with suicidal thoughts think that. They feel crazy for having suicidal thoughts. Tbh I never felt like a loser or weak for the sole fact that I have suicidal thoughts. To be honest it rather seemed to be rational and logic for me. It never fueled my self-hatred this fact. And believe me I loath myself for countless reasons relentlessly.
 
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ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
5,305
No, I'm not wrong for having suicidal thoughts. Me being suicidal is just a natural and reasonable response to how insane and cruel this world is. Just because many people disagree with me doesn't mean that I'm in the wrong
 
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Namelesa

Namelesa

Trapped in this Suffering
Sep 21, 2024
224
For me I thought it was nuts that most people don't have suicidal thoughts a lot of the time. I do understand why some people want to live but I don't understand how most people can get through life without even thinking of quiting it earlier at least once a day.

Tho I do think I am nuts for other thoughts I have.
 
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exitingtothevoid

exitingtothevoid

🏳️‍⚧️
Aug 2, 2024
52
Yes, because for me I don't have a logical reason to CTB except that my ideation sometimes gets so intense that it is all I can think about and I desperately want to CTB because of the ideation.
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
10,061
The first time I had them- I was 10 bear in mind, they frightened me. Because I had been taught that suicide is wrong, suicides go to hell etc. So- while it felt like a taboo thing to think about, it never felt 'crazy'.

I challenge anyone to experience 3 close family members die in childhood and get bullied constantly by a (suspected) narcissist and think life's great. It made perfect sense to me why I wanted the hell out!

Following on from that, life's been up and down but, it's been a lot of struggle overall. I simply don't buy that everyone has a good life by default and it's nuts to think differently. The quality of our lives vary enormously- all throughout life. I'd actually assume that a large proportion of depression is down to a person's situation. Including their history- childhood. You can't change that shit!

Besides, saying that is also saying that 'I like life' is the default setting on humans- maybe animals. Why? Surely, our default settings are: 'I will survive (and procreate.)' We don't actually need to be always joyful to do that necessarily.

A joyful antelope bounding across the plains probably missed the lion hiding in the grass. Isn't there science to say we are more wired to be affected by negative experiences? 'Oh, what a lovely sunset' won't impact your life so much as: 'Shit! Isn't that a snake?'

Of course, depression can affect people with very good lives. I think the whole classic: 'If the things that once brought you pleasure now don't' is going on then sure- maybe it is depression. Maybe it's worth trying some things out to cure it. That's not to say they will though... Maybe they're saying that to cover that demographic.

I'm guessing this book is irritating you? 😆
 
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Worndown

Worndown

Illuminated
Mar 21, 2019
3,105
Well, it is a sign there is something that is not "right" with someone. Life is not in balance.
"Nuts" is an unpleasant way to describe it and lumps them into a much larger and varied group.
 
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divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2024
3,331
For me I thought it was nuts that most people don't have suicidal thoughts a lot of the time. I do understand why some people want to live but I don't understand how most people can get through life without even thinking of quiting it earlier at least once a day.

Tho I do think I am nuts for other thoughts I have.
I always thought it was weird that there are people who dont ever have suicidal thoughts either
 
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Caffeineaddiction

Caffeineaddiction

Caffeine is my only source of happiness.
Dec 18, 2024
8
I never felt crazy, but I have felt weak and pathetic because of it. Like I'm a failure for wanting out of life and not fighting. And then I doubt my own suicidal thoughts saying that I shouldn't think this way because technically nothing is that wrong I mean there are people in way worse positions than me. All of this accumulates to feeling like I should kill myself even more, because such cowards shouldn't exist.
 
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LostLily

LostLily

Why do I exist?
Nov 18, 2024
297
When I told a friend of previous attempts she yelled at me for "being stupid" . That made me feel even worse at myself
 
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Caffeineaddiction

Caffeineaddiction

Caffeine is my only source of happiness.
Dec 18, 2024
8
When I told a friend of previous attempts she yelled at me for "being stupid" . That made me feel even worse at myself
I feel that. I'm an oversharer. After someone lashing out at me for telling them about my experience I've stopped alltogether. I just hurt people by talking about it.
 
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LostLily

LostLily

Why do I exist?
Nov 18, 2024
297
I feel that. I'm an oversharer. After someone lashing out at me for telling them about my experience I've stopped alltogether. I just hurt people by talking about it.
After that incident, I have became more withdrawn and cautious of sharing my feelings
 
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Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
11,653
No. My suicidal thoughts and sometimes active plans are a logic consequence of my personal situation and uncontrollable external circumstances.
 
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CallmeWill4719

CallmeWill4719

Member
Nov 11, 2024
51
The book I read say some people with suicidal thoughts think that. They feel crazy for having suicidal thoughts. Tbh I never felt like a loser or weak for the sole fact that I have suicidal thoughts. To be honest it rather seemed to be rational and logic for me. It never fueled my self-hatred this fact. And believe me I loath myself for countless reasons relentlessly.
I feel nuts everyday I'm still here. morbid curiosity keeps me going and spite
 
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Nadir

Member
Sep 11, 2024
15
Probably at first, I don't rly remember. Then I realized I was right, life is awful, death is preferable.
 
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hereornot

hereornot

Freedom
May 16, 2024
142
What does being crazy mean to you?


Act in disagreement with cultural norms introduced in the interest of the church and governments?

Comply with these norms and behaviors that have been defined so as not to suffer the.consequences of.society and conform to.living a mediocre life.perhaps so as not to fall into disagreement?

Hearing things that don't exist, thinking that situations that you thought were possible are real and already determining that they are real without really knowing if they are?

Deciding to end your own existence, which is something yours, yours alone, which doesn't concern anyone else, regardless of the reason because you have control over your life?

In my opinion, just one of the alternatives is not crazy. Guess which one.
 
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finishLana

finishLana

Student
Dec 12, 2021
126
Yes, I think my suicidal ideation is a lump of psychological issues I find too difficult to overcome. And desire to escape, "avoid" incoming pain and disappointment. I compare myself with my coworkers and they seem so functional and thriving in life, taking right actions and there's me who spends all energy on waking up and just survive through the day. It's just sad to have your mind all fucked up thinking about ctb. When I hear them discuss on how they are going abroad for snowboarding or skiing, feeling interested in something, having dreams and picking up new hobbies. I know everyone has their own struggles and everything comes with an effort but I feel so not enough.
I exist in my patterned loop of negative thoughts about myself and my life. Dissatisfaction levels are too much yet i struggle to take actions to achieve different outcomes. All of this shame and pain are causing obsessive ctb thoughts, which i wish i could avoid, but now idea of avoiding reality and escaping the pain seems more attractive. Just need to organize a solution.

People who say how come not everyone is suicidal and i get it, i was thinking the same at my lowest. But majority of people dont have depression (it is an illness and most of us here experienced it), they have things and people that are important and they are able to enjoy things. Cool if you played your cards right, because getting out of that negative suicidal spiral is really hard. It is breaking you down
 
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depthss

depthss

wikihow
Dec 12, 2023
192
ive never felt crazy for just being suicidal. maybe for my reasons, because i cannot find people that relate. but i have accepted suicide as a normal thing, and im excited to do it. i dont feel bad about the way i think at all
 
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U

username12345

Member
Aug 18, 2024
84
The book I read say some people with suicidal thoughts think that. They feel crazy for having suicidal thoughts. Tbh I never felt like a loser or weak for the sole fact that I have suicidal thoughts. To be honest it rather seemed to be rational and logic for me. It never fueled my self-hatred this fact. And believe me I loath myself for countless reasons relentlessly.
No what I don't get is why people always forget that when you traumatize people and they have PTSD suicidal thoughts is obviously part of that…people are not meant to live traumatic and sad lives. You are not meant to deal with abusive people or other bad things that make your life have no other meaning than trying to survive. I think because of the constant hyper vigilance/survival mode, or just more so with the amygdala being overstimulated after trauma, people think that PTSD is wanting to survive and be alive very much but it's not. Sometimes getting through a bad situation is removing yourself
 
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divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Illuminated
Jan 1, 2024
3,331
No what I don't get is why people always forget that when you traumatize people and they have PTSD suicidal thoughts is obviously part of that…people are not meant to live traumatic and sad lives. You are not meant to deal with abusive people or other bad things that make your life have no other meaning than trying to survive. I think because of the constant hyper vigilance/survival mode, or just more so with the amygdala being overstimulated after trauma, people think that PTSD is wanting to survive and be alive very much but it's not. Sometimes getting through a bad situation is removing yourself
Im so sick of the hyperviglance 24/7
 
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vercabow

vercabow

Member
Nov 22, 2024
34
not at all. that line of argument mostly follows the belief that life, no matter how bad, is always worth living. and to those people who feel that way, you just aren't thinking hard enough of a scenario where suicide would be favourable
 
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MatrixPrisoner

MatrixPrisoner

Enlightened
Jul 8, 2023
1,644
No it drives me nuts that more people don't have suicidal thoughts. Much, much more.
 
-nobodyknows-

-nobodyknows-

Mage
Jun 16, 2024
503
I agree. "Crazy" is not the word I would use for suicidal feelings. However, I do believe that it is rather unusual, especially if you do not fear death.
 

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