Have you ever been in love?

[UninformedLover]

Anybody here ever been in love?

There's this woman at my job and I can't stop thinking about her. She's been nothing but extremely kind to me and always tries to make an effort to talk to me (even though I'm very shy and a naturally quiet person.) She even says hi to me every time I see her. It's a wonderful feeling but it's also destroying my mental health from the inside out. My attraction to her is negatively effecting my personal life. I can't sleep at night because all I think about is her. I can never have any piece of mind because I spend all my time thinking about her and anticipating the next time I'll see her again. Despite that I rarely see her at work or get to talk to her and not seeing her makes me feel extremely depressed and upset. If I'm unable to speak to her at work I get hopelessly suicidal. Like today I was unable to hold any meaningful conversations with her and I spent a great portion of the day tearing up and being upset about it. Although she did ask me if I was okay... I know none of this is normal...and it's so embarrassing to feel this way but I'm just really obsessed with her. I'm trying to control my feelings for her but they are consuming me whole and I don't know what to do. To cope I started to s/h but it only makes me feel worse, not better. Sometimes I wish she never would have talked to me on my first day of work because...I don't know... it's like the kindness she showed me rewrote the chemistry in my brain. I've just never had someone be so nice to me (and probably for good reason too lol). I just want us to be great (work) friends and talk and laugh and text each other....I dunno.....

 

[sserafim]

No, I don't think so? I don't even know what love feels like. I liked my crush though but unfortunately he stopped talking to me after he got a girlfriend

 

[psp3000]

no, people tend to disgust me and having a crush feels like a severe illness or makes me want to rip my skin off or molt out of it

 

[ijustwishtodie]

No, I haven't. I don't even think I ever had a crush, nevermind getting loved

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

The situation you described sounds more like limerence than love.

I've been in love once. Most beautiful thing I've ever experienced in my life, even though we were only ever friends. It's been three years since we were friends, and the wound is still open. I think about him everyday.

 

[sserafim]

The situation you described sounds more like limerence than love.

I've been in love once. Most beautiful thing I've ever experienced in my life, even though we were only ever friends. It's been three years since we were friends, and the wound is still open. I think about him everyday.

What does love feel like?

 

[DarkRange55]

Absolutely

 

[sserafim]

Absolutely

What does love feel like?

 

[DarkRange55]

This is a thought experiment more than an answer. How do you describe being happy? How do you explain what being drunk is like to someone who has never touched alcohol? It's hard to explain certain things without reference points.
@sserafim

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

What does love feel like?

What a question lol, I've been sitting with it for a couple of minutes now and still not sure how to respond. All I can say is that I never knew joy or elation until I met him, and no matter how many years go by, I will always have this soul bond with another human being that seems to transcends time and space.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I'm in love someone. I was in denial of my feelings for him for a while but I'm coming to accept them. I'm also learning to accept the love he shows towards me.

 

[Malaria]

Yes, I'm in love with my boyfriend.

 

[dödsängel]

No and I don't think I can understand it lol. I've been attracted to girls before and don't care much. Honestly the idea of doing overly affectionate things like cuddling or romance kinda makes me cringe lol

 

[sserafim]

No and I don't think I can understand it lol. Honestly the idea of doing overly affectionate things like cuddling or romance kinda makes me cringe lol

Same

 

[DarkRange55]

Same

Could be your love language

 

[sserafim]

Could be your love language

Lol what? Idk what you mean

 

[DarkRange55]

Lol what? Idk what you mean haha

Fuck, who knows…?

Lol what? Idk what you mean

Love languages refer to the different ways people express and experience love. The concept was popularized by Dr. Gary Chapman. The five primary love languages are: words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch.

 

[theboy]

just 1

 

[sserafim]

Fuck, who knows…?

What do you mean

 

[Final_Choice]

I am very romantic but have never truly fallen in love with someone, I've had a few crushes, some deeper than others, but wouldn't say I've ever been in love. Never pursued any of those crushes though, maybe if I did I would have fallen in love, but ultimately have never been in love.

 

[sserafim]

just 1

What did it feel like?

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I'm also currently in love with a woman from my work but I don't know how well it's going to go because half the time it seems like she wants nothing to do with me and the other half she seems really interested in me but I'm just too cowardly to tell her how I feel. It's been eating away at my psyche knowing she probably doesn't like me back but even if I move on, it will take way too long and I honestly never want to have to go through unrequited love ever again. I know I said that last time and I still mean it all the same. I've been in love with only three other individuals before and they all left me for one reason or another. I never even got to start a relationship with any of them so I feel like what I've been feeling is more like limerence than actual love but it's not like I'll ever get to know the difference.

 

[WretchedDreams]

I am still deeply in love with a man I was dating for a long time. We had a courtship for 1 year and it was the most wonderful affair I can think of. Everything was going great but I ruined it because I was so stupid, insensitive, because I was insecure; I took him for granted and believed it would always be there without me making any effort.

The duel passed but I don't think I ever completely got over it, and some time later I learned that I was in the throes of borderline personality dissorder (I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and BPD after a CTB attempt) so at least I was able to understand why I screwed up. Anyway, I still talk to him and some times see how his life is going up great. I feel terrible when ... I think I was his ballast, just a liability.

Although I am considered "attractive", I have not been able to form any other type of relationship since then. Love is one of the greatest sources of distress.

 

[carac]

Some things in life are too complicated to explain in any language- Haruki Murakami

 

[ConfusedClouds]

No. Which equally scares and embarrasses and shames me. Not helped by knowing what/who/if I'm actually looking for or attracted to.

I can't even accept a friend or family saying they love me - I feel guilty that I don't feel anything back towards my parents/family and it was overwhelming and one of the reasons for me moving away and isolating when friends tried reassuring me with positivity and their love.

 

[Aesthetic guy]

 

[CloudyNightSky]

Yeah I've been in love and wouldn't recommend. Ofc there's also positive feelings, but it can be so damn cruel. For example if you fall in love with the wrong person and only get the negative aspects of falling in love with them, wich maybe ends in rejection, manipulation or abuse, I really wonder why love is so glorified.

 

[theboy]

What did it feel like?

beautiful and perhaps a bit obsessive. But it is a unique feeling

 

[AnyWonderBR]

No I haven't.

 

[tronix]

Yes.