In my case I see the summer as being the most horrible time of year, but everyday for me is so awful. I see no value in enduring endless days, nothing could ever bring any relief, I just hate having to be trapped in the same existence where finally finding a way to be free from it is not straightforward and comes with complications. Even one second of being alive in this world will always be one second too long for me. But I do get that when life just gets worse it really can be so dreadful. It feels as though suffering is simply inescapable in a life like this.