Hate myself. Hate my life. Can't CTB

[Dead Mans Shoes]

Hey all

First Post here. Literally hate myself. Can't stop ruminating thoughts about my ex. Have indoors to sleep but it's on the floor. My back hurts I've been in bed that long.

I setup suicide texts the other day. Fell asleep drunk and woke. Theyd all been sent. I woke up sheer panic. Luckily I was out of credit. Was half expecting the police to arrive. That would be my luck.

I have fentanyl from dark Web. 100 tablets of. I've never taken them and wanted to know how many tbh. Had it for ages. But I've been trying with hanging. What's more peaceful to find. Fentanyl or hanging.

Anyways. My ex destroyed my sense of being worthy. I feel so ill due to the amount of alcohol I've consumed. I feel like I'm in a dead man's shoes. Just making excuses to stay. They'll run out eventually. Fuck this world.

Hey guys. No pun but I'm Richard.

 

[CTB-London]

Hey all

First Post here. Literally hate myself. Can't stop ruminating thoughts about my ex. Have indoors to sleep but it's on the floor. My back hurts I've been in bed that long.

I setup suicide texts the other day. Fell asleep drunk and woke. Theyd all been sent. I woke up sheer panic. Luckily I was out of credit. Was half expecting the police to arrive. That would be my luck.

I have fentanyl from dark Web. 100 tablets of. I've never taken them and wanted to know how many tbh. Had it for ages. But I've been trying with hanging. What's more peaceful to find. Fentanyl or hanging.

Anyways. My ex destroyed my sense of being worthy. I feel so ill due to the amount of alcohol I've consumed. I feel like I'm in a dead man's shoes. Just making excuses to stay. They'll run out eventually. Fuck this world.

Hey guys. No pun but I'm Richard.

Is this more of a short term rut after your relationship break down that will pass?

 

[Asacschrader33]

If your fentanyl is pure you don't need much of it at all and it will be one of the most peaceful ways to go.

 

[JadedGray]

The title of this thread is relatable.

 

[FvckLife]

100 tablets of fentanyl... you're lucky, I wish I had that. I'm getting heroin off the street tomorrow and I'm gonna get drunk then snort it all. I doubt I'll die though cause the heroin probably won't be pure enough :(

 

[tiredandhuddledmass]

@FvckLife I have the same plan, too bad the OP is gone, I wish I knew where to get fentanyl. "Western society" always blubbering about "human rights" but they force you to suffer like an animal when all you want is to fall asleep in peace

 

[wanttodie]

me to I hate myself and hate my life and I hate living and need to end my life

 

[Robbyna]

I hate that I don't have the courage to CTB too. I would say it's a grave ( pun intended) decision and we shouldn't be so hard on ourselves for not taking it lightly.