zeldalover

zeldalover

Everybody agrees 👏🏼
May 16, 2023
95
I'm curious. I know it seems to be very dependent on where you go, and more likely than not it's horribly traumatizing, but I'm starting to feel like it's either inpatient or death right now. I honestly don't think I'll make it within a week or two without seriously attempting. I've never gone to inpatient and so I have no idea if it would help me but it feels like maybe the only shot I have before fully determining to full blown CTB. I've heard stories where it has helped at least for a bit, and I just need something to help keep me alive for at least a year or two.

I guess a lot of it too is that I don't want to impulsively attempt if I'm going to attempt but every day feels like I'm so close to it. I promised my therapist a week of living and I had thought that if I can make it to next week without trying that I might try to see if I can voluntarily go, as it won't be easy for me otherwise given my living situation. I can't even call my CPEP because if I do I'm convinced my mom will say that I don't need it and that I'm being overdramatic, when in actuality I was shaking so hard last night in the bathroom trying not to do it.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: sadwriter
LaVieEnRose

LaVieEnRose

Angelic
Jul 23, 2022
4,220
It didn't help me at all. It caused me lifelong trauma.

Everyone's mileage varies and it's really impossible to tell you with certainty what your experience will be. If you go in voluntarily it should be a better experience than going in involuntarily than not. But going in voluntarily doesn't necessarily mean you'll get to leave whenever you want.

If you really, really don't want to CTB and you feel you really, really can't trust yourself no matter what, then you should consider going in. But I urge you to really explore your options on the outside because you probably don't need any additional trauma.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Life'sA6itch, Hollowman and zeldalover
Alwaysdreaming

Alwaysdreaming

Lost and alone
Jul 6, 2021
46
I have gotten a great deal of help from step-down psych facilities. It's like living in a dorm with a bunch of other people for two weeks. You get two therapists assigned to you and staff is always there to assist you if you need anything. You also go to group therapy and classes throughout the day that help you better understand yourself and others. The place I went to had acupuncture, meditation, and even yoga if people wanted it. You get a psychiatrist to assist you with medications and even case management which will help you with outpatient sources. Not all places are the same keep in mind this was what was offered through my local community service board. Also keep in my mind this isn't really a fix but it does help. I have never gotten proper help from a psych ward.
 
  • Like
Reactions: zeldalover
movinout17

movinout17

Student
Feb 2, 2023
113
I'm in residential right now, you can try that. It's not in a hospital, but at a house, with 10 other people. I'm totally sure it's better than the hospital.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Alwaysdreaming
bleedingbxnes

bleedingbxnes

fight decay, perfect nothing
Nov 20, 2023
22
I'm curious. I know it seems to be very dependent on where you go, and more likely than not it's horribly traumatizing, but I'm starting to feel like it's either inpatient or death right now. I honestly don't think I'll make it within a week or two without seriously attempting. I've never gone to inpatient and so I have no idea if it would help me but it feels like maybe the only shot I have before fully determining to full blown CTB. I've heard stories where it has helped at least for a bit, and I just need something to help keep me alive for at least a year or two.

I guess a lot of it too is that I don't want to impulsively attempt if I'm going to attempt but every day feels like I'm so close to it. I promised my therapist a week of living and I had thought that if I can make it to next week without trying that I might try to see if I can voluntarily go, as it won't be easy for me otherwise given my living situation. I can't even call my CPEP because if I do I'm convinced my mom will say that I don't need it and that I'm being overdramatic, when in actuality I was shaking so hard last night in the bathroom trying not to do it.
it helped for a while. my stay was for 8 days. it basically "shocked" me out of my suicidal blur. like it was so traumatic to be taken away from my mom in an ambulance at 4 am that the protective numbness of my depression went away, and all i felt was pain. not pain because my attempt failed, but because i missed my life. i was happy for many months after, but it's very very common for the ideations to return. buuut they'll probably get you on good medication there, so that'll help! plus a treatment plan afterwards. however, it is very scary and traumatic, and the system is very flawed. then again, i was taken against my will. if you admit yourself it'll be a much gentler experience - the ladies i met there who were there by choice seemed to actually get better and were lovely to chat with. i recommend it if you're really wanting to get better but fear you may harm yourself. best wishes!
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: edu0z
penguinl0v3s

penguinl0v3s

Wait for Me 💙
Nov 1, 2023
799
No, it was traumatic.

Inpatient is not designed to treat depression or other mental disorders. It is solely designed to stop you from killing yourself, under the assumption that your active suicide ideation is only temporary and will go away if just held in captivity for a few days.
 

Similar threads

H
Replies
3
Views
278
Suicide Discussion
houd1n1
H
Mx_Pathetic
Replies
3
Views
130
Suicide Discussion
dying flower
D
A
Replies
4
Views
307
Suicide Discussion
DeadManLiving
DeadManLiving
toxicjester
Replies
10
Views
436
Suicide Discussion
toxicjester
toxicjester
TANETS
Replies
8
Views
301
Recovery
Hollowman
H